


Trouble Sleeping

by Sammynughh



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adventure & Romance, After 9 Serums Cure For Werewolf Works Under Weird Circumstances, Blow Jobs, Bottom Dean Winchester, Bottom Dean Winchester/Top Sam Winchester, Bottom Sam Winchester, Cas Erases Mary's Memory of Incest, Castiel Finally Shows Up, Crowley & Scientist Attempt Werewolf Cure Again, Crowley Turns Dean into a Werewolf But Can't Cure Him, Dean Infects Sam and Sam Becomes a Werewolf Too, Dean Tries To Cheer Sam Up, Dean Winchester Has a One Night Stand, Dean is Captured and Turned Into a Vampire Then Cured, Dean is Experimented on By Crowley by Order of Toni Bevell, Dean is First To Tell Sam His Secret Lust For Him, Dean is a Werewolf Crowley Keeps in Cage to Cure., Dean is a voyeur, Dean's Sexy Goatee, Dildos, Good Wolf Pack Needs Help Killing Rogue Wolf, Hurt Sam Winchester, M/M, Mary Cured By Mind Meld Using Dr. Shaffer's Computer & Hypnosis, Mary Has No Memory of John or Her Sons, Mary Kept Locked Up in Hell Until Dean 's Cured., Mary Sees Sam & Dean Having Sex Then Leaves Again, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Dean Winchester, Rogue Werewolf Pack Almost Kills Sam, Sam & Dean Organize Raid on BMOL Hdqtrs After Freeing Mary, Sam Almost Died Dean Needs Him Sex, Sam Catalogs BMOL Weapons and Crowley's Cures, Sam Dreams of Having Sex with Dean, Sam Fucking Winchester is Bad Ass, Sam Kills Toni Bevell and Blows Up BMOL HQTRS, Sam Winchester Has Wet Dream of Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester Has a One Night Stand, Sam Winchester in the Hospital, Sam is Captured in Room with "Lucifer", Sam is Drugged By Toni Bevell and Hallucinates Seeing Lucifer, Season/Series 10, Season/Series 12, Sex in Baby (The Impala), Sharing a Bed, Sick Dean Winchester, Spector Bugs Moran Protecting Haunted House, Spooning, Story Jumps From S10 to S12 in Chapter 8, Swimming, Switch Sam Winchester, Switch Vincent Flynn (Original Character) One Night Stand, Toni Bevell Kidnaps Mary Winchester Planting Bomb in Bunker, Top Dean Winchester, Top Dean Winchester/Bottom Sam Winchester, Top Sam Winchester, Werewolf Cure Fails With Dean, Werewolf Problem in Indiana, Wincest - Freeform, Winchester Brothers Go to Garth's Farm, Winchesters work with vegan werewolf alpha to kill rogue killer werewolf, brothers being brothers, crowley is in Devil's Trap Bracelet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-01 18:32:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 46,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17872577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammynughh/pseuds/Sammynughh
Summary: MATURE AUDIENCES ONLYTHIS IS WINCESTWARNING: Smut, Angst, Action/Romance, Drama, Incest, Hurt!Sam, Comfort!Dean, Top!Dean, Bottom!Sam, Top!Sam, Bottom!Dean (Only twice. Both times initiated by Dean & second time stopped by Dean w/o completion), Canon Divergence BIG TIME!, Season 10, Season 12WORDS: Total of 15 chapters. 46,741 words total.SUMMARY & BACKSTORY: Begins in 2014, Season 10 after Demon!Dean has been cured by Sam. Dean still has the Mark of Cain, but Sam's not actively looking for a way to remove it just yet. He just needs a break. He's depressed and tired.Dean isn't feeling the full weight of the blade right now. Crowley has it hidden far from him. His main concern is Sam. Why Sam hasn't given him the boot after trying to kill him, he doesn't know. He hates himself, but he will do whatever he can to make it up to his little brother.~~~~~Wincest Canon-divergent meaning the story line has been completely altered from SPN canon facts on purpose. SPN Characters are not mine.





	1. Depression

NOTE: I know, according to canon, Dean can't get physical ailments while he has the Mark of Cain. (The flu, pneumonia, cancer, etc.) Although he did get sick when he got close to the site where the angels tried to smite Amara. (Cas tried to stick his finger in Dean's mouth.) Just note that in this fiction, Dean CAN get illnesses.

Also, Sam is NOT in an arm sling.

•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪•▪

 

Sam knocks on his brothers bedroom door at 10pm or so. "Hey. You still up?"

Dean's just quietly listening to his music when he hears Sam knock. "I'm up."

Sam enters the dimmly lit room and stands near the foot of his brother's bed having second thoughts about why he's there. His head is bent low as he looks toward his older sibling.

Dean can tell Sam needs to talk. He sits up and pats his bed. "Have a seat and tell me what's eating you."

Sam sighs. He's thinking about not saying anything at all. What if he just gets ridiculed? Dean has enough to worry about with the Mark of Cain on his arm. Sam's thinking that Dean doesn't need to hear his pain in the ass little brother's stupid problems.

He's about to turn and just leave when Dean grabs his wrist. "Hey."

Sam turns and makes eye contact with Dean. He sees no ridicule or mockery on his face. Only real patience and concern. "Talk to me."

Sam nods and takes a seat. He sits forward and rubs his face with his hands. His elbows are resting on his knees.

Dean sits beside his brother. Whatever it is that's bothering Sam, it's serious. He places his hand on Sam's back and soothes him some while waiting patiently for him to say whatever he needs to say.

Sam is already starting to feel better. He knows these feelings are temporary, but if he ignores them, they'll only get worse and manifest into something he won't be able to control. "I haven't been myself lately. I can't sleep and I just feel empty. I'm not sure what it is, but I don't think it's anything supernatural like something taking over me. I think I'm just..."

Dean pulls on Sam's arm. "Come here."

Sam leans toward Dean as his big brother wraps his arms around him. Sam rests his head on Dean's shoulder while Dean holds him tight. "You've been lonely Sammy. First, I go and get myself killed, I become a demon, you chase me down and then I'm chasing you down with a hammer." He rubs Sam's back. "I'm so sorry. I know this had to be very hard on you. You're depressed, but I'm here for you now."

Sam nods and is so grateful that Dean understands. He feels his tears fall as relief fills him that his brother knows what he's going through and doesn't think he's being childish for it.

They part and Dean sees Sam wipe at the tears on his face. He places his own hand on Sam's wet cheek. "Bunk here tonight." He smiles. "I'll be the big spoon."

Sam can't say a word or he might just cry some more. His emotions are terrible right now. This life of sacrifice has given him absolutely nothing in return but heartache and pain. Only Dean understands every last bit of that.

Dean gets under the covers and makes room for his ginormous little brother to curl up in front of him.

Sam gives his brother a grin when he sees Dean waiting for him. Images of him and Dean sharing motel beds as young boys fill his mind as he slips off his house shoes and robe. He gets under the covers with Dean. His back to Dean's front.

Dean curls himself closely to Sam and places his arm around Sam's chest hugging him tight. "I got you Sammy."

Just those words alone send Sam into tears again. Nobody has Sam like Dean does. Nobody.

"Shhhh. It's okay little brother." He rubs Sam's trembling chest as he cries. "You're okay. I promise, you'll feel better in the morning."

Sam sniffles. "Thanks De."

Dean hates it when Sam's in pain of any kind. "That's why I'm here. Now, try to get some sleep."

Guilt is eating Dean up. That's why he believes that the minute Sam cured him of being a demon, Sam should have told him to hit the road. Instead he's here needing Dean's comfort of all things.

After a few minutes. After Sam has calmed down. Dean reaches over and turns the bedside lamp off.

They both sleep more peacefully than they have in a long time. No nightmares. No dreams that either can remember. Just a deep restful sleep.

~~~~~

Sam wakes up to Dean's empty bed. He looks at the clock and it shows 10:48am. "Wow!" He's about to get up when Dean walks in holding a tray of food.

Dean smiles at seeing that Sam's awake. "Good morning princess!" He sets the tray of food on the desk by the bed. He then goes to Sam who's sitting on the side of the bed and gives him a hug. "Feeling better?"

Sam really does feel better. This warm greeting by Dean makes all the difference. He knows it might all be temporary, so he will cherish it while he can. He hugs Dean back and lets the warmth of it fill his battered soul. "I'm getting there."

Dean leans away from Sam and pats down his crazy bed head. "That hair Sammy. Five minutes and some scissors."

Sam smiles as he stands up. "No!" He slides his house shoes on and robe before looking at the tray of food. He looks back at his brother. "You did this for me?"

Dean shrugs. "Well, yeah. I know you like fresh fruit and oatmeal better than cakes and eggs. I just figured..."

Sam cuts him off with another body crushing hug. "Sammy... can't... breathe."

Sam smiles. "Sorry." He lets Dean go. "I just can't believe you made oatmeal AND cut up a cantaloupe! You hate that."

Dean says nothing. He just pats Sammy's cheek and tells him _"But I love YOU, you idjit."_ with his eyes.

Sam gets the message loud and clear.

After using the restroom, Sam eats his breakfast in Dean's room while listening to Dean's music that Dean selected to play. Songs they grew up listening to, of course. Happy and up beat songs.

"Let's go do something." Dean suggests. "Whatever you want. Wherever you want to go." Sam likes seeing Dean in this kind of good mood. He hopes it lasts.

Sam smiles. "You like fishing."

Dean tilts his head while looking at his brother. "What is it YOU what to do?"

Sam bites his bottom lip. "Go swimming in a nice, big swimming pool?"

Dean smiles. "Awesome! We haven't done that in ages. We'll get the beer cooler and have some tunes going." He claps his hands together and rubs them. "Let's do this!"

Dean pauses as he was about to grab something. "I know of a great place to go!" He turns back toward Sam. "Pack a duffle and load your hunting bag too."

Sam sighs. "No hunting Dean!"

"No. We aren't hunting." Dean touches Sam's shoulder. There's a huge mansion less than 200 miles from here that Crowley owns. It has to still be in the hands of him, his demons or abandoned because it's haunted. Humans won't live there. I suggest we check it out. The pool is awesome! It has a waterfall! Oh, and from what I remember, it has a slide and one end of the pool is 12 feet deep!" Dean looks like a kid about to go to an amusement park.

Sam smiles at his very excited brother. "Okay. Just know if things get too hairy, we aren't staying. I'm not wanting to get into a fight with anyone or anything." Sam can't deal with Dean's anger issues right now.

"Agreed. The only hairy thing we'll deal with today is you." Dean tugs Sam's hair.

"Ouch!" Sam smiles.

"Go! Get your shit, bitch!" Dean goes to grabs his duffle.

Sam leaves Dean's room with a smile on his face and lightness in his step. "Jerk."

~~~~~

  
Dean and Sam arrive at the huge mansion Dean had in mind. It's two stories and has at least 15 bedrooms. For such a huge home, it's very well secluded.

The gate is open and covered in vines. The driveway and lawn are unattended and overgrown. Sam gets concerned that the pool idea might be a bust. If the lawn looks like shit, the pool must be empty or green and slimy. Right?

They pull to the side of the mansion and exit Baby. Both men have salt shotguns in hand as they enter the back of the property to do an initial inspection. Sam has his demon knife and Dean an angel blade.

Turns out that the pool looks perfect. Dean was right about someone still living here, if living is the correct term. Demons or monsters, someone's been maintaining the pool and, from what they can see, the inside of the home.

Dean grins. "What'd I tell ya Sammy?! Perfect, huh?"

Sam's still cautious, but starting to feel a bit better about the whole idea the longer they're there and nothing pops up.

Touching the pool water Sam notices something. "Saltwater."

"What?"

Sam looks up at Dean from where he's bent down by the pool. "The water is saltwater. Demons can't swim in this."

Dean's brow furrows. "It wasn't like that when I swam here with Crowley."

Sam sighs. "Maybe there's new owners and they did this to get rid of the old tenants."

Dean smiles. "Smart."

A shotgun racks from behind Dean. "Don't move!"

Sam and Dean stay still.

"Who are you and why are you here?"

Dean turns slowly with his arms out to his side. Shotgun still slung over his shoulder. He sees a man not much older than himself pointing a shotgun at him. "My name's Dean Winchester. This is my brother Sam. I visited this place when it was owned by Crowley."

"Crowley don't come around here anymore. Rumor has it he's hiding from the devil. Frankly, I could care less. This place is mine now."

Dean suddenly recognizes the man. "WAIT! You're Bugs! Damn it Bugs, put that gun down before someone gets hurt!"

Sam is floored by Dean's behavior.

Bugs looks at Dean. "Oh wait. I remember you! You still one of those black eyed bastards?" He levels his shotgun at Dean's chest.

"Hell no! Wait." Dean slowly pulls his weapon off his shoulder and sets it on the ground. He pulls his boots and socks off. He then places his feet in the saltwater pool. "See?! If I were a demon, I'd be smoking out right now. Right?"

Bugs points the gun at Sam. "You're next kid."

Sam sighs heavily as he takes his shoes and socks off. He whispers to Dean, "Who the hell is this asshat?"

Dean whispers back, "Bugs Moran. THE Bugs Moran. Just do as he says."

Sam can't take his eyes off the gangster now as he gets his feet wet. With Sam's affinity for reading anything related to serial killers and crime as a kid, seeing the actual Bugs Moran is a real treat for Sam.

Bugs is satisfied the brothers aren't demons. He lowers his weapon. "You boys are welcome to stay, just don't mess up the joint!" He flickers and vanishes.

Sam is shocked. "A specter."

Dean nods in agreement. "He died in Leavenworth prison of lung cancer."

Sam sighs, "I know."

Dean rolls his eyes, "Well, The prison's not far from here. A lot of the ghosts in there are from the prison."

Sam has his shoes back on at the same time Dean does. "Demons must have really pissed him off. You sure you want to stay here? We could just swim and sleep somewhere else."

Dean smiles. "Let's just have some fun and worry about sleep later."

Sam unloads the Impala of the beer cooler, snacks, portable stereo (with cassette player), cassettes and other essentials.

Dean gets the power turned on at the mansion so they can plug in the music, have lights and hot water later on.

Sam is overly cautious. He draws a salt line around the car, just in case.

Dean teases him. "You gonna pour salt around the whole pool Sammy?!"

"Screw you! It's better to be cautious."

Dean starts playing AC/DC on the stereo and cracks open a beer. He tosses one to Sam and they drink it down quickly. They open a second beer. The sun is high and it's getting hot outside. The beer really hits the spot.

The brothers have swim shorts on under their jeans. So, they strip down by the pool and dive right in.

Sam's face is the happiest that Dean has seen in a very long time. He's laughing, splashing around, diving, and teasing Dean relentlessly. It's like the brothers suddenly went back in time and are in their teens again.

After about 6 beers each, they're singing loudly and chasing each other in an endless game of water tag. Sam pulls out a football and they toss it around for a while. Later, Dean has fun on the water slide while Sam relaxes under the waterfall.

Dean has an idea. He challenges Sam to dive to the bottom of the 12 foot end of the pool and fetch a bullet. Sam tries, but he can't find it. Dean dives down and finds it on the first try.

Sam yells, "No fair! You cheated!"

"Bullshit! You saw me go down and get it!"

Sam shakes his head. Wet hair flopping. "It's not the same bullet."

Dean's a bit lightheaded and getting pissed. "Fine! I'll do it again!" He takes the bullet in his hand and shows it to Sam. He then marks it against the rough edge of the pool. Afterward, he holds it up to Sam's face. "See that! Unique, right?"

Sam nods. "Yeah."

Dean tosses it into the deep end of the pool. He takes several deep breaths and dives for the bullet.

He grabs the bullet from the bottom of the pool. Just as he's about to come up, something grabs his wrist. It looks like a pale woman with her hair flowing behind her. She's holding his wrist so he's unable to surface. Dean struggles against the force holding him under water, but he can't get free. He loses consciousness.

~¤~¤~

  
Dean wakes up to Sam pressing hard on his chest. He coughs up a lot of saltwater and it burns his lungs, throat and nose. He inhales deeply and keeps coughing. Each cough causes more pain, but provides vital oxygen.

Sam falls back on his ass completely out of breath. "Oh thank god!"

Dean's voice is very rough, "Bitch drown me."

Sam's confused. "What?"

Dean sits up. He's still coughing. Sam gets him a bottled water from the cooler. Dean drinks some with gratitude. He then explains about seeing a ghost in the pool.

Sam starts feeling guilty about wanting to go swimming.

"No. Don't you do that."

Sam's eyebrows go up. "What?"

Dean gets up and takes several deep breaths. "You know what." He walks up and embraces his brother. "I'm fine Sammy. We're having fun. Don't go blaming yourself for any of this." He looks into Sam's eyes. "We're Winchesters." He shrugs with a grin. "Shit happens."

Sam can't help but smile at Dean's goofy grin and devil-may-care attitude.

Sam gets to thinking. "Dean, with the pool having saltwater in it..."

They both say it together, "A ghost shouldn't be able to manifest in the water."

Dean asks himself the question: _"What was it that grabbed my wrist and held me under water then?"_

Dean sees Sam getting dressed. "Come on Sammy! We don't have to leave." Dean gets his jeans and puts them on. Sam's done and Dean feels terrible about it.

Sam's buttoning up his flannel. "I really don't want to stay Dean. It was great up until you died and I had to give you CPR. I just for once want to have something go right." He has his clothes on and starts picking things up.

Dean finishes dressing himself while listening to his brother. He feels terrible about ruining their fun day. "I'm sorry Sam." He goes to turn the electricity to the mansion off while Sam starts loading up Baby.

Dean kicks his feet while walking to the meter to turn it off. In all honesty, he can't blame Sam for not wanting to stay another minute. Dean thought this place was awesome. Maybe it was for a Knight of Hell and his King of Hell buddy. Just not so great for the brothers that save the world and do their damnedest not to die in the process.

~~~~~

  
The ride back to the bunker is quiet except for Dean's occasional coughs. Dean isn't even playing music.

Sam brakes the silence about 30 minutes down the road. "How does your throat feel?"

"Hurts. I've felt worse." He reaches over and places his hand on Sam's. "I'm okay."

Sam pats the top of Dean's hand and gives him a small grin that he doesn't feel.

Dean doesn't move his hand. He asks, "You okay?" He's worried about Sam. The recent events could make his depression worse.

"I'm okay. Just tired." Sam turns his hand over and squeezes Dean's hand. "I'll make you some hot lemon and honey tea when we get to the bunker. That should help soothe your throat."

"Sounds good." Dean grins as Sam lets go of his hand.

After a couple minutes, Dean sees a fast food burger place he likes. He pulls in and places an order.

Sam orders a grilled chicken sandwich. He had no idea just how hungry he was until Dean pulled into the drive thru.

Dean takes the lid off his vanilla milk shake and sips on it. It soothes his throat some.

Sam smirks. "You're gonna regret that later."

"Shut up. It's helping now."

They eat while Dean drives the rest of the way back to the bunker. It takes them a couple hours to get home.


	2. Sick Bed

Once home, they unpack the car. They each shower and get ready for bed.

Sam makes the hot tea he promised for his brother and brings it to his bedroom.

Dean smiles at Sam. "Thank you."

"Oh. You sound worse." Sam holds his own throat as if he too can feel how harsh and sore Dean's throat must truly feel.

Dean tries to clear his throat.

"Don't do that. You'll only make it worse." Sam gives him the cup of tea. "Drink this."

Dean sips on the warm liquid and it is very soothing. He just wishes it could also soothe the burn from his lungs, but they will just need to heal on they're own. He tries to not let Sam know just how badly his lungs and throat hurt, but damn it! It hurts to breathe!

Sam leaves and returns with a large bowl full of hot water and a towel. "Sit up on the side of the bed."

Dean does and Sam sets a chair between Dean's knees and places the bowl on the chair.

"I placed a remedy in the water. Lean over the bowl with the towel over your head. Breathe in the steam and it'll help you feel better. You might even breathe better."

Dean sighs. He's not use to Sammy being the "mother hen", but he does as Sam says.

After about 10 minutes of breathing in the steam, (That smells not so bad, by the way.) Dean's lungs feel better. He feels like he can take deeper breaths. "Thanks Sammy."

"You sound better already." Sam smiles.

Sam disposses of the bowl of water and the towel. He returns the tea dishes to the kitchen as well.

Sam returns to Dean's room to see if he needs anything else.

"Will you... I slept really good last night."

Sam smiles. "Me too. You want me to sleep in here again?"

"Would you mind?" Dean's smile is something no living creature can resist. Relative or not.

Sam nods and approaches Dean's bed. "Can I be the big spoon?" His eyebrow is up telling Dean he will gladly sleep big or little spoon, but is asking to be the big spoon.

Dean just nods. He rolls over so his back is to his little ginormous brother. Sam curls his long body around Dean.

Dean reaches up and turns off the bedside lamp. He then reaches behind him and takes Sam's arm and curls it up against his chest. Presses Sam's open hand over his heart and doesn't say a word. The action alone speaks a thousand words to Sam.

Sam is Dean's heart. Sam knows this. He feels it. As long as Dean loves him this much, Sam will be okay. Darkness will never take Sam and have it's way with him again.

Sam wakes up to Dean being very hot, drenched in sweat and shivering in his arms. "Damn it!"

Over the next 72 hours, Sam nurses his brother back to health. It's exhausting, but Sam can't stand the fact that Dean got sick while trying to lighten his little brother's mood.

~~~~~

  
Dean gently wakes Sam up after he'd been sleeping almost all day.

Sam sits up immediately. He rubs his face. "I'm up. You need something?"

Dean hands Sam a cup of coffee. "Here. Drink this."

Sam accepts it and is happy it's a perfect temperature for drinking.

"Now, go shower. You stink." Dean leaves Sam's room without another word.

After his shower, Sam discovers Dean's been busy. He's doing laundry. He stripped Sam's bed and has it in the wash. He also made a roast for dinner, which smells amazing!

Dean is cleaning up in the kitchen when Sam takes the broom from his hands, sets it aside and hugs him. "Thank you."

Dean hugs him back. "You rested up?"

Sam nods as he releases his brother. "Yeah. I was pretty wore out, I guess." He grins. "You sound a lot better."

Dean grins back. "Thanks to you. Felt like I was dying there for a bit."

Sam doesn't comment.

Dean continues, "You know, I think I was getting sick before we went swimming. The second dive I made for that bullet was a bad idea on my part. I was already feeling winded and tired. I might've already been feverish and didn't even known it." He sighs. "What I'm getting at is, I don't think anything held me under water. I think I panicked because I couldn't surface fast enough and lost my sense of direction. My mind messed with me and I drown. You saved me by the pool. The water in my lungs damn near gave me pneumonia and damned if you didn't save me again." He squeezes Sam's forearm. "Thank you."

Sam nods in agreement that Dean being sick makes more sense than a ghost in saltwater. "You're welcome. And let's put this experience on our extensive list of things to never ever do again."

Dean picks up his broom. "Agreed." He sweeps and Sam pours himself some coffee.

"I'm still going to find something for us to do that will lighten your mood." Dean finishes his task with the broom.

Sam wears a bit of a smile. "Can't you see my mood is already improved? Just you being healthy and things being almost normal are enough for me. Oh, and dinner. It smells amazing!"

Dean is beaming with pride now. "I made your favorite and mine."

Dinner was fantastic! Pot roast with all the veggies that Sam loves. Dean also got an apple pie that he baked in the oven and served up warm with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Sam truly felt spoiled.

~~~~~

  
Another night. Another nightmare.

Sam wakes up alone in his bed after dreaming that Lucifer mutilated and stabbed Dean to death. Lucifer was very evil about it too. He knows every thought inside Sam's mind. He knows how deeply Sam loves his brother. The way the devil killed his brother... Sam's best friend. Sam's shaken to his core because he was the one killing Dean while being possessed by Lucifer. Sam saw Dean's blood on his own hands.

Sam knows something about killing others and not being able to do anything about it. Seeing his own hands doing things he has no control over. The first time, it was a hunter named Steve Wandell who Sam murdered while the demon Meg possessed him in 2007. In 2010, Sam happily killed a room full of former Azazel coherts while being possessed by Lucifer. He tells himself, _"At least I was able to jump into the cage and save the world from suffering a two-thirds annihilation."_ The most recent occurrence was right before Christmas in 2013. Gadreel used Sam's hands to kill Kevin Tran. Sam can't ever let this happen to him again.

It's 3:17am. Sam silently jumps out of bed and rushes down the hall to Dean's room. His door is ajar, like usual. Dean's laying on his back, earphones on and fast asleep.

Sam closes his eyes and lets out the breath he was holding. _"See. He's fine. Just a stupid nightmare. Go back to bed Sam."_

As he starts walking away he hears Dean.

"Sammy?"

Sam turns back toward Dean's door.

Dean's sitting up on his elbows, headphones off and looking at his brother with concern. "Everything okay?"

Sam rakes his fingers through his hair. "Yeah. Just... I'm fine."

Sam's ready to turn and leave when Dean sits all the way up. "Seriously. You okay?"

Sam stops and has a certain look that Dean's familiar with.

"Come here." Dean sits on the side of his bed and pats the space beside him.

Sam shrugs as he stands by the doorway. "Dean, I'm not a kid any more." He won't even look at his brother.

"I know that." Dean's reply is soft. He's trying really hard to not placate his brother. None of Sam's mental or emotional issues are trivial. Ever. If he's showing signs of physical distress, it's serious. Dean knows Sam needs help. "Just know I'm here for you anytime."

Sam lifts his head and looks into Dean's eyes. A gruesome memory from his recent nightmare hits him. Sam's left wondering if the images from his dreams are darkness spawned from his own deep dark issues or do they come from the demon blood that he nursed on as a baby? Maybe... maybe Lucifer was right. Maybe there will always be this struggle to fight against his true nature. Sam's not wanting to accept that his true nature could be anything other than good, but moments like these trouble him terribly.

Dean's up off his bed and has hold of Sam's face. "Hey, you're okay."

Sam wants to back away and leave, but at the same time he needs reassuring that he's not falling into darkness. Not again.

Sam just winces. "Make it stop."

Dean presses his forehead to Sam's. "I'll do whatever you need to help make it stop Sammy. What do you need?"

Sam is holding his own palm and Dean notices. Memories of Sam's hallucinations and their repercussions cause Dean to cringe. He leans back and holds Sam's hand. "You seeing hallucinations again?"  
Dean's not accusing, he's concerned.

Sam shakes his head. "Just vivid nightmares. Really bad ones and I have no idea where they're coming from. They're so vile and evil. I can't believe my mind is capable of coming up with the things it's showing me De." His hands start visibly trembling.

Dean holds Sam in his arms. "You know you're not evil Sammy. Right? You know you're not cursed and the nightmares are just horrible memories from being in that cage. The cage was real, but you're not evil. You're not Lucifer. You know this, right?"

Sam is holding on to his brother tightly. He's clinging to every word Dean is saying and willing each word into truth. _"I'm not evil. I'm not cursed. Nightmares are just horrible memories from that cage. I'm not Lucifer."_

"Sammy?"

Sam takes a deep breath and lets his brother go. "Yes. I know." He lifts his head and they make eye contact. This time, Dean can see Sam's feeling better. "Thanks De."

Dean smiles. "See. You're not as much of a pain in my ass as you might think."

Sam lifts one eyebrow. "What if this whole time, the pain in the ass has always been you?"

Dean gets an offended look on his face. "I was going to invite you to a sleep over, but now you went and hurt my feelings."

"Awwwe. Sorry Jerk." Sam pushes his brother playfully.

Dean gets back into his bed and picks his headphones back up. "Seriously though, if you need to crash here, you can. I'm here for you." He puts the headphones on and winks at his brother. "Bitch." Sam can hear the music through his headphones as Dean turns it on.

Dean watches as Sam leaves his room. Dean holds his hand over the mark on his arm. He closes his eyes and lets the music lull him to sleep.

Sam goes to the kitchen and makes some herbal tea before going back to his own bed. He sleeps the rest of the night with no further disturbances.

~~~~~

  
Over breakfast in their kitchen, Dean asks what Sam's nightmare was. It's the first time Dean's ever asked Sam for details on one of his nightmares.

Sam's been looking at lore about the Mark of Cain for months. Dean says it's a curse, so he's researching ways to maybe undo the curse. Sam closes his laptop computer. Dean's question about Sam's nightmare has him confused, "Why do you want to know?"

Dean rolls his eyes. "I'm writing a book."

Sam looks at him in stunned silence.

"Why do you think I'm asking? I want to try and help you find out why you're having them. To do that, I need some info to work with." He shrugs.

Sam swallows nervously. He folds his arms over his computer while thinking. "You told me about your time with Alastair. My time with Lucifer was... similar in some respects. Lucifer played twisted games."

Sam can't look at Dean while talking about this. So, he looks at the loose granules of pepper on the table. "While possessing my body and using my hands, he'd use numerous tools of his imagination to disembowel and dissect the bodies of those I love." Sam rubs his hands over his face trying to keep those images from reemerging in his mind.

He swallows hard and hopes his breakfast stays down as he forces himself to continue. He still can't look at Dean. "Once all he had was my soul, he continued the same type of torments, but turned his instruments on me. He destroyed my soul with his torments that were truly unimaginable until they were made real for me."

Sam is visibly shaken. Dean places his hand on Sam's that are trembling badly. Sam finally looks into Dean's eyes. "My nightmares are always some variant of my hands tearing at your flesh, with or without a blade. The part that wakes me up almost screaming in terror is how much I enjoyed what I was doing. It was giving me a high like drinking demon blood." A tear escapes the corner of Sam's eye and he looks away quickly.

God, Sam hates himself right now. What kind of a brother just tells his only family member something like this? He dreams of murdering him and in the dream enjoyed doing it. Really?!

Dean quickly sits beside Sam and hugs him. He knows Sam may reject his affection, but Sam needs to KNOW that Dean doesn't hold anything he just said against him. He doesn't think Sam's a freak or a monster. He just loves him and wants to help make him better.

Sam lets his pain out. He holds his brother. "I'm sorry Dean."

"Hey. You didn't do anything to be sorry for Sammy. You're having nightmares because of bad memories that aren't your fault." He looks into Sam's eyes after wiping away his tears. "I have very similar nightmares Sam. I enjoyed tearing people apart while Alastair watched. It's called hell for a reason. The longer you're in it, the more you adapt and start enjoying what you're doing because it beats the alternative."

Sam nods in agreement.

"We'll get through this. I know you. The real Sam. You're not a freak. You're not a monster. You weren't born to be some vessel of evil. You're my little brother and a damn good man. I brought you up right with a little help from dad. Everything you need to be the best YOU is right here." Dean places his hand on Sam's chest.

"And here." Sam places his hand on Dean's face. "I can't do it without you."

"You've never had to and never will." Dean's feeling emotional now. He's glad Sam's opening up to him. Maybe now he can start healing some. He and Sam will never fully heal. Ever. Dean just wants Sam to get back into a good place.

Dean looks at Sam's uneaten bacon and eggs. "You should eat. Let me make you something different maybe? Oatmeal?"

Sam says nothing as Dean gets up and takes Sam's cold plate away. He starts boiling water for oatmeal and watches Sam make a fresh cup of coffee. He hopes Sam gets better now. The guy deserves a break from his own mind. Hell, they both do.

~~~~~

  
It's been a little over a month and Sam has only had a couple bad dreams.

Dean has had a few himself. It seems that talking with Sam put a crack in the wall that Dean had up in his mind keeping his memories of Alastair and hell at bay. Dean doesn't mind though. Seeing Sam improve has been worth it.

Going on a few hunts helped too. Dean watched Sam take out a werewolf with such speed, he was impressed. Dean could watch Sam hunt all the time. He knows that's weird, but it's a pride thing. Dean's so proud of Sam and watching him do what he does best just fills Dean's heart like nothing ever could.

~~~~~

  
Sleeping at a motel after a vampire hunt, both Sam and Dean took some hits and got banged up pretty bad.

Stitched, bandaged and iced up - they go to sleep in their separate queen beds completely exhausted.

Sam wakes up to Dean whimpering. He might be in pain. "Dean? You okay?"

Dean moans while holding the mark on his arm, He's panting and sounds distressed.

Sam moans as he painfully sits up. He goes to Dean's bed and can tell he's having a bad dream. He gets into bed beside Dean and gently wakes him up. "Brother, wake up."

Dean gasps and opens his eyes. He sees Sam lying beside him and immediately curls up against his chest. Sam wraps himself around Dean and holds him. Nothing is said. Just comfort being given.

They both fall back into a peaceful sleep.

Sam wakes up a few hours later and quickly goes to the bathroom. He's out of breath as he leans against the sink with his eyes closed. Images still in his mind of Dean kissing him and touching him. He's had dreams like this before, but not this intense or vivid.

Sam sits on the toilet with the lid down. He lowers his boxers and holds his straining cock in his hand. Just a few strokes and he cums. He bites his lower lip to keep from making any noise.

He sits there a few minutes hating himself as he catches his breath. He finally gets up, uses the toilet and then quickly cleans himself up.


	3. Vincent

Sam leaves the bathroom and stands beside his brother's bed. It's 4:25am. Dean's lying on his side facing the window overlooking the street of the motel they're staying in.

Sam can hear Dean's long deep breathing as he lays back down behind him. He places his arm around Dean's body and Dean instantly responds by taking Sam's hand and holding it to his chest.

When did this happen? Sam's chest is tight and his whole body has a forbidden desire to be as close to his brother as possible. He's always loved Dean, but these feelings are new and they're scaring Sam worse than jumping into Lucifer's cage did. How can he accept this? How can he explain it to himself, let alone Dean?

Sam decides to keep this to himself. He'll acknowledge to himself that he's in love with Dean, but he will show true love by not acting on it. He closes his eyes and savors the feeling of holding his brother in his arms. This is the most he will ever hope to get from Dean and it's enough. It's more than enough. Sam feels a warmth in his soul and knows it's gratitude that his brother is still here and not in heaven, hell or stuck in purgatory. He's still here and loves Sam enough to hold his hand to his chest as he sleeps.

Yes, this is enough.

Sam falls asleep with a smile on his face and a warm chest full of love - he has his brother.

~~~~~

  
Two days later, back at the bunker, Sam announces to Dean that he's going to get laid.

Dean's eyebrows go up. "Really?"

Sam smirks as he adjusts his nice non-plaid dress shirt. "Yeah. Really."

"Need a wing man?" Dean has a smile that won't quit.

Sam is actually blushing. "No. I'll be back before dawn."

Dean tosses Sam the keys to the Impala. "You know the rules. Have fun."

Sam catches the keys with a smile. He was hoping he didn't have to drive one of the MOL cars. "Thanks."

~~~~~

  
Sam met a guy online using a dating web site. He's never done that before, but his dreams about Dean are getting to be too intense. Sam's only been with a guy once and that was in college. All they did was suck each other off.

Sam's very nervous about doing this, but the guy he's meeting looks a little bit like Dean. Sam talked with Vincent on the phone. He was able to have an intelligent conversation and he even made Sam laugh.

Vincent is a mechanic. He drives a 69 Dodge Charger he restored himself. He's also a gun collector. Mostly antiques. He likes hunting deer, but hasn't done it in a while. Fishing is more his thing.

Sam arrives at the bar they chose to meet at. He sees the black classic Charger parked toward the back of the parking lot, so Sam parks the Impala beside it. He gets out and sees Vincent standing beside his car.

Vincent walks around the Impala. "Jeezus! Where did you get this?"

Sam smiles. "It was my dad's."

After a walk around he smiles up at Sam. "Lucky bastard." He gives him a hug and Sam hugs him back.

"I guess. Hope I didn't keep you waiting?" They step back.

"Nah. Just got here." He looks into Sam's eyes. "You're taller than I expected."

Sam just grins. He's obviously nervous.

"Hey. It's okay." Vincent takes Sam's hand. "Let's go inside and have a drink."

Sam nods and they enter the bar together.

Sam discovers this is a gay bar, so them holding hands isn't a weird thing here.

Vincent even paid Sam's cover to get in. Apparently there's a "show" tonight. Sam is very curious about this.

They go to the bar and Sam orders a beer with a shot of whiskey. Vincent has the same. Sam insists on paying for the first round since Vincent paid to get in.

Sam is able to slip some holy water into Vincent's whiskey when no one is looking. He also touched him with a palmed silver coin.

They sit, talk and drink for a while. (He passes all of Sam's monster tests.) Sam loves looking into his eyes. He has long lashes and honey brown eyes. They just seem to sparkle. His hair is short and blonde. It's cut almost identical to Dean's. He's got a goatee with a mustache that's neatly trimmed at a perfect length. Almost a reddish tint to his facial hair. His last name is Flynn. Irish blood.

There's a stage at this bar. The lights dim everywhere else and a show begins on stage where men dressed as women perform lip syncing competitions. Sam is amazed. He's seen drag queens before, but never performing on stage like this.

Vincent is sitting beside Sam. They're both on bar stools. He holds Sam's hand in his. "What do you think?"

Sam is smiling. "It's amazing!"

"Right! How can they do that?"

"I never could."

"Me neither."

Sam turns to look at Vincent. Vincent places his hand on Sam's cheek and kisses him. A simple chaste kiss.

Sam looks into Vincent's eyes with his own hand over Vincent's that's still on his face.

"Was that okay?"

Sam nods. "Again."

Vincent kisses him again, but this time it's a deeper kiss. Sam placing his hand on Vincent's jaw and moving his hand down his neck. Vincent moans as their lips part. "That was nice." He smiles.

They both turn back toward the show and their drinks.

Sam is so hard right now. He hopes he knows what he's doing.

~~~~~

  
It's 12:40am. Sam follows Vincent back to his house. It's in a quiet little suburb.

Once inside, Vincent pushes Sam against a wall and kisses him hard and full of need. Sam kisses him right back. After a few moments of this they pause to catch their breath.

Sam confesses. "I've never gone all the way with a guy before. I mean, I've fooled around, but..."

Vincent nods. "Lucky for you, I have." He kisses Sam again and rubs his hand over Sam's crotch. Sam moans at his touch. "You're gonna enjoy this."

Sam's cheeks are red, he's hard as fuck and he doesn't know how long he'll last with this gorgeous man.

"I'm going to make you cum. Then, we'll take our time and enjoy things. Cause right now, you're wound up way too tight. I can tell it's been a while."

Sam just nods, unable to make any coherent thought after what he just heard.

Sam's still leaning against the wall as Vincent unbuckles Sam's belt and lowers his pants. He lowers Sam's boxers and strokes Sam's very hard cock while kissing him. Vincent fists Sam's hair and Sam groans at how good this feels.

Vincent unbuttons Sam's shirt while still kissing him. He moves his hands over Sam's chest. He kisses his way down Sam's neck, chest and abs till he's kneeling in front of him. He then licks Sam's cock from base to tip while Sam watches. Sam is biting his bottom lip as Vincent takes Sam into his mouth and starts sucking on him.

Sam's head goes back as pure pleasure fills him from the base of his spine up. Vincent gives him an amazing blow job. He sucks and licks him perfectly. Swallows him to the back of his throat several times. Strokes his spit covered cock with his fist then goes back to sucking on it some more.

Sam gasps, "Mmmah, gonna cum."

Vincent pulls back and strokes Sam's cock as he cums. Sam's palms are against the wall keeping him from falling as the waves of his release hit him. Only noise he makes is a grunt and gasp for breath.

Vincent ends up with cum on his hand and some on his cheek. He stands up to kiss Sam and Sam smiles a dopey grin as he uses his finger to wipe the drop of cum off Vincent's cheek. He surprises Sam by licking it off his finger and then sucking on his finger a little bit after.

Vincent is starting the fire back up in Sam's belly. Just that quick.

He releases Sam's finger and kisses him. Sam can taste himself on Vincent's tongue and likes it.

Vincent backs up and smiles. "I'm going to clean up." He waves his cum covered hand. "Don't you DARE get dressed!" He laughs. "In fact." He grabs Sam's hand with his clean hand to drag him along.

"Wait! I need to take my pants off!" Sam laughs, almost triping over his pants that are still around his ankles.

They both laugh and wait for Sam to slip out of his shoes and clothes. Sam's naked and feels a bit vulnerable, but exhilarated at the same time as he lets Vincent guide him wherever he wants.

They go to his master bedroom. "Go ahead and get comfortable." Vincent uses the vanity sink.

"The toilet?" Sam points to the door by the vanity.

"Oh yeah. Go ahead."

Sam uses the bathroom. When he return and washes his hands, he finds Vincent naked beside the bed.

Vincent is beautiful. He has an athletic build that shows he's got definition, but he doesn't work out to achieve it. Sam's mind quickly compares Vincent to Dean, but there really is no comparison. Dean has lived a hard hunter's life. Vincent is younger and his body is pristine.

"What are you thinking?"

Sam approaches Vincent. "You're beautiful."

He shakes his head and looks away. "Well, there's a first."

"What?" Sam cups his cheek and looks into his eyes. "No one's ever told you that before?"

"No. Cute or handsome, but never beautiful." Vincent looks deep into Sam's eyes.

"You're all those things. Very beautiful." He kisses Vincent and they move onto the bed.

Sam hovers over Vincent while they kiss. He rests his hard cock next to Vincent's and slowly moves his hips while they kiss. Both of them enjoy this for a short while.

Sam then kisses his way down Vincent's body and looks into his eyes as he takes his cock into his mouth.

Sam loves seeing his lover's reaction. Vincent arches his back with a moan as Sam sucks on him. He remembers how Vincent gave him head and imitates his actions as best he can. Sam gags a few times trying to swallow his cock, but soon gets the hang of it.

"Stop! Stop! Stop!"

Sam sits up suddenly afraid he did something wrong.

Vincent sees the confusion on Sam's face. "No. It's okay. I just don't wanna cum." He grabs hold of Sam and kisses him. "I want this to last. You know?"

Sam nods. "So do I."

"I want you inside me." Vincent is now the one blushing.

Sam swallows hard. "O-okay."

"I know you've never done that, but I can show you it feels good." He runs his fingers through Sam's hair.

"I've fingered my own prostate, so I know it feels good. I just haven't with anyone else." Sam's face is flushed now, too.

"You want to bottom?" Vincent's thumb moves over Sam's jaw.

Sam can't think right now. Vincent has his mind going in circles.

"Tell you what. You top first. If you still want to try bottom, we'll switch. Okay?"

Sam smiles and nods.

Vincent reaches into his nightstand and gathers a box. He opens it and removes a vibrator, lube and a couple condoms. He hands a condom to Sam. "I got to prep first. You will too, if you bottom."

He lays back on the bed and Sam watches as Vincent lubes his hole and then lubes his vibrator. It's a little bit smaller than Sam in size, but large for a toy. Sam watches as he first uses his fingers to open himself up. Stroking his cock and fingering his hole. He then hands the vibrator to Sam. "Slowly. Okay."

Sam places the toy at his lover's entrance. He watches the look on his face as the vibrator enters him. It's pure ecstasy. "Oh god that feels good!"

Sam just holds it inside him until he tells him it's okay to move. Sam then fucks Vincent with the toy some and watches his reaction. It's enough to make Sam achingly hard. He wants to be inside Vincent so badly now, he can taste it.

"Fuck me Sam! Please!" Vincent is panting and in need.

Sam removes the toy and rolls the condom onto his very hard cock. He places a pillow under Vincent's hips. He adds some lube to his sheathed cock and slowly presses it inside this most gorgeous man. Once he's all the way in, he leans down and kisses him.

Vincent grabs hold of Sam and kisses him with a heated passion. His legs up around Sam's waist as Sam begins moving his hips. Vincent's mouth opens up against Sam's in a gasp. Sam sits up and holds his lover's hips as he starts moving with some consistency.

"Feels so good Sam." His face is of total bliss.

Sam's having a hard time believing just how perfect this feels. How normal and right. He's making love to a practical stranger, yet Vincent seems like he could be something more. Sam decides to stop over thinking and just enjoy.

Sam really gets into it. He enjoys every touch Vincent gives him as they make love. Every kiss. Every sigh and moan.

Sam pauses and leans over Vincent. They kiss. "I want you inside me now."

Vincent is panting. "You sure?"

Sam nods. "Definitely "

Vincent wipes at the sweat on Sam's brow then kisses him. "You're gonna love it."

Sam backs away and tosses his condom in the trash.

Vincent washes his toy. He gets a towel and hands it to Sam to help with the sweating. He also lowers the A/C and turns on the ceiling fan. Hands Sam a cold bottle of water. They both drink their water. It's a nice break. They sit and just look into each other's eyes while cooling off a moment.

"You're beautiful too, you know?" Vincent grins.

"Thanks." Sam looks away with a grin and runs a hand through his damp hair.

Vincent takes Sam's bottle and sets it on the nightstand. "I mean it. You are fucking gorgeous." He kisses Sam and Sam melts into Vincent's embrace. Vincent straddles Sam's lap and holds him in his arms as they make out for a bit.

Once their lips are completely red and swollen from kissing, Vincent tells Sam to lay back and he'll help prep him.

Sam lays back on the bed and Vincent places a pillow under Sam's hips. He smiles. "If this is too weird for you, tell me. I think you're going to love it though. It'll help you relax. So, relax."

He smiles as he first lifts Sam's cock and licks it from base to tip.

"Mmm. That's nice."

"Just wait."

He sucks on Sam's cock a bit then sucks on his balls. Licks his taint and then moves to lick his hole. Sam gasps at the sensation of Vincent's wet tongue against this most private of areas. Vincent isn't shy about eating Sam's ass either. He really gets into it. The head of Sam's cock drips pre-cum on his abs as Vincent continues giving Sam pleasure in a way he never knew before.

Vincent then slides a lubed finger into Sam and starts loosening him up. Adds a second, rubbing his prostate on purpose. Sam is moaning in pleasure. "Feels good."

Vincent smiles. "Good." He gets his lubed vibrator and slowly inserts it. Sam winces at the added girth. "You okay?"

Sam takes a deep breath. He looks into his lover's eyes. "I'm good. Don't stop."

Vincent has the vibrator in and after a few moments to adjust, he begins fucking Sam with it while sucking Sam's cock.

The pain-pleasure Sam's experiencing is perfect. He's making noises he's never heard himself make. "You... you better fuck me. I'm not... not gonna last."

Vincent smiles as he releases Sam's cock with a grin. He removes the toy and leans over Sam to kiss him. "I love how you taste."

Sam smiles. He tastes himself on Vincent as they kissed. It's something new and has Sam's head spinning. "I'm ready."

Vincent puts a condom on and lubes up. He lubes Sam's hole and slowly pushed himself inside. Vincent places a hand over Sam's chest. Sam feels his own heart trying to beat right out of his chest and into Vincent's hand. Amazingly enough, there isn't any pain.

Sam moves his legs to wrap around his lover's waist. Vincent moves at a steady pace. Their eyes stay focused on each other as Vincent starts to move faster.

He's hitting Sam's prostate just right. Sam moans. "Like that! Oh yes!" He's even trembling some it feels so good.

Vincent feels Sam's heart racing. His body trembling. Sam is so incredibly hot right now. So passionate. He leans down and kisses him. "You're amazing Sam."

Sam has his eyes closed. Enjoying the complete and total pleasure Vincent is giving him. When he leans down and tells him _"You're amazing Sam.",_ Sam has a flashback of being in the cage. It only lasts a second, but he sees Lucifer on top of him like this. Sam quickly blocks it and has help when Vincent kisses him and starts stroking his cock.

Sam opens his eyes and watches as Vincent works his body against Sam's. Thrusting deep and fast, he gasps and grips Sam's hips. "I'm close."

Sam starts stroking his own cock. "Me too."

"You first." Vincent grunts and keeps thrusting just perfectly.

Sam, using his own pre-cum as lube, strokes his cock quickly and with the friction against his prostate... "Oh, I'm cumming! Yessss! Nughhh!" He cums harder and longer than he's ever cum before. He had at least 10 spasms of cum leave his cock and some flew up his chest and onto his neck.

Seeing Sam come completely undone beneath him, Vincent couldn't hold back and finds his release while still inside Sam. "Oh shit!!" His eyes roll back and his whole body trembles as he cums. He moves his hips slowly a few times before carefully removing himself with the full condom from Sam's backside. He disposes of the condom while Sam is wiping off his own mess using the towel Vincent gave him earlier. Sam also removes the pillow from beneath him and wipes up his backside.

Vincent returns to the bed and lays across Sam's chest. Both men are covered in sweat and smell like sex. They love it. He kisses Sam. "Stay till morning. Have breakfast with me at least."

Sam looks into those honey brown eyes of his. How can he say no?


	4. Sharing Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since it's the weekend (and I really want to keep these next two chapters together *wink*), I'm going to post two chapters instead of just one. I know you'll enjoy them as much as I did writing them. Thank you for following my stories! ❤

Sam feels awful about rejecting Vincent's offer to sleep over and wake up to have breakfast.

"I can't stay. I have an appointment tomorrow that I can't miss." He rubs Vincent's back.

"Will I see you again?" He sighs as if he knows the answer.

"I'd like that." Sam looks into his eyes. "I mean it."

Vincent smiles. "Good."

Sam doesn't want to move, but he must. "I really need to go."

Vincent lets him up.

Sam gets dressed while Vincent puts on a robe. Once dressed, Sam uses the bathroom, then washes his face and hands. Feeling a little refreshed, he's ready to drive home to the bunker.

Vincent gives him a wonderful parting kiss with a promise of more good things to come. All Sam has to do is call.

~~~~~

Sam pulls into the bunker garage at 4:28am. He heads straight for his bedroom to grab clothes and take a shower.

After his shower he goes to the kitchen and Dean's in there pouring coffee. Sam comments, "You're up early."

"Went to bed early. I was bored." He's looking at Sam with a grin.

Sam has a cup of coffee and is heading for the fridge. He looks at Dean. "Don't."

"Don't what?"

"You know what."

"Night moves?"

"Shut up."

Dean laughs.

Sam points at Dean's car keys on the counter. Dean pockets them.

"Was she sexy?"

"Yes." Sam smiles as he makes a sandwich.

"Tell me about her." Dean sits down wanting to hear all about Sam's sexcapade.

"She had the most amazing eyes. Honey brown with long eyelashes. Moves like you wouldn't believe. Absolutely beautiful." Sam can't stop smiling.

"Heeeeyy! I think you're smitten!" Dean looks shocked by Sam's description over this one-night-stand.

Sam waves a hand at Dean blowing him off. "Whatever!"

"Seriously dude! You don't normally talk like this about chics."

"You're right. I don't." Sam shrugs as he takes his plate and coffee to the table Dean's at. He starts eating like he's starving. He really worked up an appetite. He looks at Dean. "We got any chips?"

Dean starts laughing. "Yeah. I'll get em." He gathers a bag of plain potato chips and a bag of Cheetos.

Sam takes the potato chips. Dean starts munching on the Cheetos.

"It's good to see you in a better mood Sammy." Dean is legitimately happy Sam is feeling better.

"Thanks." Sam does feel much better. He just hopes the yearnings for his brother will finally subside now that he's gotten some dick. Sam laughs at himself over that thought.

"What's so funny?"

"She wanted me to stay. I told her I had an appointment and couldn't. Funny thing is, I wanted to stay." He eats more chips.

"You should've." Dean's serious.

"No. Unless I'm ready for a serious relationship, I won't do that. How can I get into a serious relationship with anyone when we have a family business of saving people and hunting things?" More food in mouth.

"Tell her and see what happens."

Sam chokes.

Dean jumps up and gets him some water. Sam drinks it. He clears his throat. "You did that with *she who I must not name or get my nose busted* and look how that went."

Dean sighs heavily. "Yeah. Things are different now though."

"How so?"

"The apocalypse is over. Nothing is actively out to kill us."

Sam shakes his head. "Aren't we suppose to be putting Lucifer back in his cage? And what about the Mark on your arm?"

Dean just shoves his mouth full of cheetos.

Sam sighs not really wanting to discuss Lucifer or the Mark either. "Look, if she was already a hunter and in *the life*, maybe. I'm just saying I'd never bring another living soul into what we do. Ever."

Dean just nods in understanding. He sort of feels hurt though too. Hurt that Sam can't have a significant other. Dean did have that life with Lisa for a short while and it was perfect. He thinks back on it from time to time and misses her and Ben. He'd love it if his little brother could have a piece of that apple life for himself.

Sam touches Dean's hand. "You okay?"

Dean places his other hand over Sam's. "I'm fine. Just know there's nothing wrong with staying till morning with a chic. Sometimes, you get waffles and morning sex." Dean smiles. "Morning sex is awesome."

Sam also smiles and nods. "I'll keep that in mind."

"You gonna see her again?"

"She was clingy. I don't know if I should. I want to, but she may get too close if I do." Sam finishes his food and goes to put away his plate and the bag of chips.

Dean gets up. "Well, I think I'm going out tonight to get laid myself."

Sam smiles. "Good! It's about time. You get grumpy when you haven't gotten any in a while."

"Whatever." He turns and goes to his room.

Sam goes to his room and goes right to sleep.

~~~~~

  
Sam's on all fours while getting fucked from behind. It feels perfect. Hands are holding his chest and move over to his back. Fingers move up into his scalp and grip his hair as the cock goes deeper into his tight ass. Sounds of skin slapping against skin. "So good!"

He reaches down and strokes Sam's throbbing cock while still fucking him from behind.

Sam moans out, "I'm gonna cum."

"Cum for me Sammy." Dean kisses Sam's neck while fucking him. He strokes Sam's cock as Sam cums hard. Dean cums in Sam's ass while holding Sam's body in his arms. "I love you so much Sammy."

"I love you too De." Sam is still panting.

~¤~¤~

  
Sam wakes up in a pool of sweat. Another dream about having sex with Dean. "Damn it!"

Dean is at Sam's door. "You okay?"

Sam sighs. "Yeah."

"Yeah right." Dean goes and sits beside Sam. "Try that again."

Sam grits his teeth. "Just dreams Dean. I'm okay."

Dean sighs. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"It didn't help, did it?" Dean is looking right into Sam's soul.

Sam shakes his head. "No. It didn't." Sam is feeling like he's being punched in the gut.

Dean hugs him. "Don't forget that I'm here for you."

Sam holds Dean and breathes him in. He aches to kiss him and tell him how much he needs him. How much he truly loves him. "Thanks."

"You sure you're okay?" Dean wipes the sweat from Sam's brow.

Sam says nothing.

"Come on. Change and come to my bed. Yours is soaked." Dean gets up and heads out of the room.

Sam gets up and changes clothes. He then goes to the bathroom and washes his face. He's so tired and has only slept a couple hours.

He shuffles his feet as he heads for Dean's room. Dean's bed is empty. Good. Sam hits the bed and falls right to sleep.

~~~~~

  
"Sammy, get up."

Sam wakes up to Dean sitting beside him on the bed and gently waking him. "I'm up."

"Dinner's ready." Dean touches Sam's face before he gets up and leaves.

Sam touches his cheek where Dean touched him. That was odd. Dean doesn't normally act this affectionate. Sam confesses to himself that they both have been a bit closer. They touch and hug more. That touch Dean gave Sam was something more though. Wasn't it?

Sam gets up and shakes it off. "It was nothing."

He goes to the kitchen and Dean has Sam's plate ready for him. "You wanna eat in here or go to the man cave?"

Sam smiles. "You know I wanna watch TV."

They take their food and beer to the man cave. Once there, Dean turns on the TV and they start watching a Marvel Comics movie.

During the movie Sam's phone buzzes. It's Vincent texting him. "I can't stop thinking about you. I want to see you again."

Sam texts back. "I also enjoyed our time together, but I'm not looking for a relationship."

Dean sees Sam texting. "Who're you texting?"

Sam looks up. "Last night's date. She wants to see me again." He puts his phone away. "I told her I'm not looking for a relationship."

Dean bites his bottom lip as he looks at Sam. "Such a heart breaker."

"Shut up, Jerk. Watch your movie." Sam grins.

Sam's phone buzzes again. Sam looks and Vincent replied, "I understand. If you ever decide you need to unwind, you know were to find me. Goodbye Sam."

Sam's chest hurts. He really liked Vincent.

"Go see her again."

Sam looks up from his phone to see that Dean is watching him. He saw his reaction to Vincent's text. If Dean only knew the truth of it all. Sam explains to Dean, "We discussed this. I can't get into a relationship with her because of what we do. She wants a serious relationship. So, this is better. I just told her goodbye."

~~~~~

  
It's a little after 1:00am and Dean's in a cheap motel with a tall brunette that just so happens to look a little bit like Sam. Her eyes match his remarkably and that's what caught Dean's attention the moment he saw her at the bar. He knew he had to have her.

Dean has her on all fours on the bed and he's fucking her from behind. She's taking the pounding he's giving and she's begging for more. She's climaxed several times.

Dean has her get onto her back and they start fucking missionary. He looks into her eyes and can't help but see his Sammy looking back at him. It sends him over the edge. He buries his face in her hair as he cums and she holds him in her arms.

"Oh sugar, you were spectacular." She kisses his jaw.

He turns his face so their lips meet and they kiss for a little bit. At least until he has to get up and remove the used condom and clean up.

They shower together and get dressed.

"You hungry?" Dean offers.

"No. Thanks though. I should get going." She grabs her purse. "I really had a good time Dean." She kisses him and walks out the door and out of his life.

As the door closes he says, "Bye Amber. I won't be seeing ya."

He turns and sighs. "This sucks." He then grabs his things and leaves as well. He stops for a quick burger before heading home.

He returns to the bunker a little after 2:30am. He's tired, so he heads straight to bed.

He finds Sam asleep in his bed and smiles. He gets undressed so he's only wearing his underwear and a t-shirt. He gets under the covers with Sammy and spoons behind him.

Sam sighs heavily, but doesn't wake up.

Dean falls right to sleep.

~~~~~

  
"Sammy, wake up."

Sam wakes up from a vivid dream where he's tied down and Lucifer is about to carve into him. He's shaking from how real it was.

The bedside lamp is on and Dean sees the terror on his brother's face. He doesn't ask anything. He just pulls Sam into his arms. "You're okay Sammy."

Sam takes the warmth and comfort Dean provides. Memories of that cold cage filling his soul are the last thing he needs right now. Dean is really good at keeping those memories away.

Sam decides to distract himself by asking about Dean's night. "Tell me about her."

Dean smiles. "She wasn't much to talk about. Tall with long dark hair. She was good at taking, but not so much at giving."

Sam sighs against Dean's chest as he listens to his steady heartbeat. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I got off."

Sam snorts. "Well, that's good."

"You okay?"

Sam let's go of the hold he's got on his brother. "I'm better. Thanks."

Dean touches Sam's face. "You can tell me anything."

Sam looks into Dean's eyes and thinks about what to say.

"I could tell you a secret, if you promise not to be a bitch about it." Dean smirks.

Sam rolls his eyes. "I won't, jerk."

"You may get mad, but I'm just gonna tell you. I feel better the closer I am to you. Sex with Amber doesn't compare to this." Dean runs his hand over Sam's hair. "The look in your eyes when I touch you. It's not sexual, Sammy. It's a bond between us and I've become addicted to it. I'm a junky and you're my fix."

Sam's face is red and he can't stop smiling. He hides his face against Dean's chest as tears start to form in his eyes.

"Sammy?" Dean's worried he may have said a little too much.

"I'm okay." Sam holds onto Dean tightly. "I've felt the same about you for a long time."

"Really?!" Dean's shocked.

"More so, even." Sam can't believe he just said that.

"More so? More so, how?" Dean's confused.

Sam can't look at Dean as he says this, so he keeps his head against Dean's chest. "I've had dreams about you."

"Dreams as in _dreams_ about me?" Dean has images of Sam kissing and touching him in his mind.

"They got so intense. That's the reason I had to go out and get laid."

Dean has been fingering Sam's hair as he's been talking. He's concentrating on what Sam's trying to say. He thinks he understands. "You went and got laid because you kept dreaming about having sex with me?"

Sam lifts his head and looks at the reaction on Dean's face. "Yes."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. "Okay. My guess is that it didn't help."

"It did at first. Sex with Vincent was something I never thought I'd ever be able to do, but I did and it was amazing. Way better than I thought it would be."

"Vincent? You had a date with..." Dean's eyes light up with understanding. He smiles. "I never would have guessed that."

"You're not disgusted by me?" Sam winces at his own question.

Dean presses his forehead to Sam's. "No. You can tell me anything and everything Sammy. I'll never walk away from you. I'll never reject you or hurt you. I promise."

Sam closes his eyes and keeps his forehead against Dean's. "I love you."

"I love you too, Sammy."

"No. De, I love you so much it hurts." Sam holds onto Dean harder and prays he keeps his word about not rejecting him.

Dean wraps himself around Sam and holds him. "Like I've said, I need you like a drug. When you're not near me, I hurt. When we're like this I feel whole. I'm not sure how far we should go with this." Dean pulls back and holds Sam's face in his hands. He sees the tears in his eyes. "Just know that I understand and I'm not going anywhere." He leans in and kisses Sam on the lips. A small, perfect kiss.

Sam is stunned by Dean's kiss. He smiles afterward and wipes at his own eyes. "Sorry I'm being such a bitch."

Dean laughs. "Hey, you're my bitch. It's okay."

"Since I'm your bitch, would you mind kissing me proper?" Sam's eyes are practically begging as he asks to be kissed.

Dean places his hand on Sam's jaw and leans in for a real kiss. His lips meet Sam's and it's electrifying. Dean's tongue presses against Sam's for the first time and it's better than either of them ever imagined. Sam let's Dean control the kiss and he's damn good at it. Dean tastes better than he imagined he would too. It ends a lot sooner than either of them wanted it to. Both of them out of breath and staring into each other's eyes.

Sam places his hand on Dean's cheek. It comes out breathy, but sincere, "I'm forever yours."

Dean's a bit emotional, which he doesn't handle very well. He just wants Sam to feel safe and know what they're feeling isn't wrong. "I know. It's okay Sammy. I won't let you get hurt." His hand cover Sam's. "No matter what, we'll figure this out."

Sam falls asleep on Dean's chest with him fingering his hair. Soon Dean is asleep too.

~~~~~

Sam wakes up first. He has a smile on his face as he feels the warmth of his brother under his head. He listens to Dean's heartbeat and finds it soothing. He loves Dean more than his own life.

Sam looks at Dean's peacefully sleeping face. He's aging gracefully for a man who's been through so much. He's got scars and Sam can remember how Dean got most of them. Sam likes the scruff of a beard he has right now. He wishes Dean would let his facial hair grow out some, but FBI agents don't have facial hair and Sam pushes it with his long hair as it is.

Sam can't stop looking at Dean's perfect lips. Perfectly kissable lips. He can't stop himself. He leans up and kisses Dean softly on his perfectly kissable lips.

Dean smiles, but doesn't open his eyes. "Morning sweetheart."

Sam smiles. He loves the endearment. "Morning."

Dean smiles. "Another peaceful night. I could get use to this."

Sam moves his fingers through Dean's hair. "I could too."

Dean opens his eyes and sees Sam hovering over him. His eyes are dilated and he looks full of a hunger that Dean's very familiar with. "Sammy." Dean moves his hand through Sam's long hair. "We should get up before we do something..."

Sam kisses Dean softly and Dean moans at how tender his brother's affection is toward him. Not pressing or demanding.

They stop and Sam is breathless. "Yeah. We should get up. I gotta go shower."

Dean watches as Sam jumps up like he's on fire and runs for the shower in his t-shirt and pajama flannels. He can see that he's painfully hard and will most likely need to relieve that.

After laying in bed a couple minutes, Dean jumps up and sneaks into the shower. He gets a peek at Sam right as he cums against the tile wall he's facing while jerking off. He hears Sam grunt Dean's name as he climaxes.

Seeing this causes Dean to want to cum himself. He rushes back to bed and quickly pulls his cock out. It only takes a few quick strokes and Dean cums on himself. He's surprised by how intense his orgasm is and how much he came. Still panting, he quickly cleans up before Sam returns.


	5. The First Time

After giving himself a better orgasm than the one he had with Amber last night, Dean gets up and grabs clothes. He heads for the shower. "You done yet?!"

"Yeah!" Sam opens the door. "Just finished shaving.

Dean touches his smooth face and kisses his cheek. "Nice."

Sam touches Dean's scruff. "You should let yours grow out some. I think I'd like a goatee and mustache on you."

Dean practically blushes. "Seriously?"

"Hell yeah." Sam loves that he got that reaction out of his brother.

"Okay."

"Okay?" Sam's shocked.

"Sure. Why not?" Dean shrugs.

"Our ruse as FBI agents? Law enforcement?" Sam shrugs.

"Look Goldie Locks. If you can get away with long hair, I should be able to get away with nicely trimmed facial hair." Dean laughs.

Sam laughs. "True." He side steps Dean and leaves him to take his shower.

While Dean's in the shower, Sam makes coffee and types in his journal on his laptop. He's been keeping this personal journal for years. It's helped him quite a bit with sorting out a lot of his problems.

Dean comes into the kitchen looking amazing! Sam can't take his eyes off his new look.

Dean sees Sam gawking at him. "Stop it."

Sam catches his breath and quickly looks away. "Sorry."

Dean can't help himself. He sits next to Sammy and waits to see what he does.

Sam's surprised to see Dean suddenly right next to him on the bench. He reaches up with both hands and touches Dean's face. He can't stop smiling. "I love it, De!"

"It might be temporary, so enjoy it while you can." Dean sighs.

Sam just hugs his brother. "You be yourself. Don't change for me. I love you no matter how you look."

Dean rubs Sam's back. "I know. I love you too."

Sam touches Dean's face one last time before he goes to make breakfast.

Dean's scrambling eggs. "You know, I have to admit I jerked off while thinking about you today."

Sam was drinking coffee when Dean said this and it goes down the wrong way. He starts coughing.

Dean looks at him and watches as he rushes for a glass of water to clear his throat. After a few swallows he replies, "Why would you tell me that?"

Dean smiles at his brother and goes back to making breakfast without saying anything.

It suddenly dawns on him, "You saw me."

Dean shrugs.

Sam sits back down at the table. "Whatever. You already know I dream about us. You know how I feel. I guess the feeling's mutual then?" Sam waits for a response.

Dean pulls the cooked eggs off the stove. He looks at Sam. "Yes Sammy. I've had dreams like yours. I've just never entertained them until you showed me how you felt. Your kiss..." He shakes his head and smiles. He then goes back to making breakfast.

Sam is ready to jump Dean right here and now. Fuck if he isn't the world champion at flirting. Sam whispers, "You're killing me."

"What?" Dean glances toward Sam as he butters waffles from the toaster.

"Nothing."

Sam types in his journal every detail of these recent events. His biggest question that he asks himself: "Do I pursue sex with Dean or not?" He then types out pros and cons. Pros outweigh cons, of course.

After breakfast, Dean suggests going grocery shopping.

Sam thinks about how domestic their lives are becoming. He likes it, but he has a sinking feeling that something bad is about to happen. Why? Well, because it usually does.

~~~~~

  
After putting away the groceries, they settle back in the man cave with some beer and a few snacks.

Dean pauses the movie. "If I asked you to, would you make love to me?"

Sam can't breathe. He can't believe he's hearing Dean say these words. "Exorcizamus te omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potentus omnic incursio infernalis adversarii."

Dean laughs a hardy laugh at Sam's exorcism. "Seriously?! Come on Sammy!"

Sam is laughing too. "Seriously! Where's my brother and what have you done with him?"

Dean gets up and goes to Sam's recliner and sits in Sam's lap with his knees on either side of Sam's hips.

Sam's a bit surprised by Dean's actions as he holds Sam's face and kisses him full of want and desire. Sam kisses him back and soon they're pulling each other's shirts off and touching each other. Kisses moving over flesh as well as fingers.

Sam's head goes back against the recliner as Dean kisses his neck and sucks at his earlobe. Sam is breathless. "Point of no return De. You sure about this?"

They look into each other's eyes. Both of them have a burning need to give the other as much pleasure as they possibly can. It's not as much about self as it is about giving to their other half.

Dean answers Sam's question. "It's no longer something I want. You're what I need Sammy. I can't go another day without being a part of you. Somehow." He kisses Sam and Sam moans it's so good.

"Let's go to your room then." Sam kisses Dean's neck as he lets him up.

~~~~~

  
Sam's about to get all he's ever wanted. He's lying on his back and holding Dean in his arms. They're kissing and he's really in the moment, but he's not wanting anything more than this.

It's as if there's a spell on them. Right now, Sam's convinced that the moment they cross the line where they become true lovers, he'll lose Dean. He'll lose the man he knows and loves more than his own life.

Dean is kissing Sam's neck and reaches down to cup Sam's cock over his Jeans. He notices that Sam's not hard. He sits up and looks into Sam's eyes. "Sammy?"

Sam grabs his face and kisses him. "De, I can't lose you. Not over this. We do this and everything between us changes."

Dean strokes Sam's hair. "Sweetheart, things have already changed between us. It's better. Don't you think? We're closer than we've ever been. We communicate way better than we ever have. I know you and you know me." Dean kisses Sam's forehead. "I'd love nothing more than to watch you come undone at my touch. Let me love you Sammy with all that I am. You know I'm not like this with anyone but you."

Dean sees the stress on Sam's face. He sighs and relaxes against Sam's chest. "It's okay. I'm just happy to be here like this." He rests his body on top of Sam's. His head lying on the center of Sam's chest.

Sam holds Dean in his arms. He's not sure why his mind and body are suddenly rejecting the thought of Dean sexually touching him. He wanted it more than anything and now, this is all he wants. He has an idea though. "Let's take our clothes off and just lay together."

Dean grins and gets out of bed. Sam follows. They both strip off their jeans, underwear and socks.

There's an awkward moment. They stand naked in front of each other and just look as if seeing each other for the first time.

Dean is fully erect and Sam takes note of how large his brother's cock is. Dean is truly a beautiful man to look at.

Sam is semi-hard. Dean takes in all the physique and beauty of Sam. To Dean, he looks like a Greek god. Dean reaches out and places his fingertips on Sam's jaw as he stands there gawking at him. "You okay?"

Sam sees the love in Dean's eyes and he wraps his arms around him. They stand like this for a moment. Sam moves his hands over Dean's arms as they part.

Dean notices Sam's very hard now. He takes Sam's hand. "Touch me." He places Sam's hand on his chest.

Sam thumbs over one of Dean's nipples and watches his reaction. Dean licks his bottom lip and then swallows hard trying to not moan. He has very sensitive nipples. He looks Sam in the eyes. "I want you, but I won't make a move unless you want me to."

Sam moves his hands over Dean's shoulders. He moves closer so he can kiss Dean's temple and press the side of his face against the side of Dean's face. Sam's slightly trembling and barely audible, "Once we do this, there's no going back."

Dean moves one hand into Sam's hair. His other hand he pulls Sam's body flush with his own. Sam kisses Dean's neck. Dean quietly moans and takes a deep breath, "I'm asking you to show me just how much you love me Sammy. I need to give you this one last part of me. It's like I want to share my soul with you." He sighs deeply. "My heart feels like it might beat right out of my chest. It's because of you and what I'm feeling right now."

"I feel it too." Sam's finally ready. His fingers move through his brother's hair. He talks softly in Dean's ear. "Touch me, De. I want to feel your touch."

Dean's lips move to find Sam's and they kiss. His hand moves from Sam's hip to his hard cock.

Sam closes his eyes and moans at his touch.

Dean stops kissing so he can see Sam's face as he slowly strokes him. See him as he gives Sam pleasure.

Sam's now looking at Dean. His eyes are full of desire and need.

Dean also sees so much love within the fire that's burning in his little brother's eyes. "I love you so much."

Sam can hardly breathe. He places his hand on Dean's very hard dick.

At first, Dean closes his eyes and his head goes back as pleasure rolls through him. A very faint sound escapes his lips, "Ahh."

Sam sucks a kiss against Dean's throat as his head is still facing the ceiling. Sam licks toward Dean's ear. His deep voice begs, "Let me see your eyes."

Dean lowers his head and looks at Sam while Sam continues stroking Dean's very hard and now leaking dick.

Sam watches him pant at his touch. Dean's emerald eyes are dilated and look more green than Sam's ever seen them.

"Fuck. Feels so good Sammy." Dean's breathing harder and is having a hard time keeping a rhythm while stroking Sam's very rigid and pre-cum soaked cock.

They stand there stroking each other and watching each other's reactions. Both of them in awe of one another for different reasons.

Dean finally catches his breath enough (and gets his thoughts together enough) that he takes Sam by the hand. "Come on." He leads him back to bed.

Sam lays down on his back and Dean just looks at the man in his bed.

Sam grins. "What?"

Dean sighs. "You're a fantasy come true. I never thought I'd get what I'd always wanted."

Sam is propped up on his elbows. "I'm yours. Whatever you want, I'll give it to you. Just promise me you'll never leave." Sam looks damn near afraid that Dean might just pack up his shit and go right now.

Dean is immediately in bed with Sam. He has him pressed down and kissing him while fisting his hair. After a few moments, they come up for air with a gasp. "I'll NEVER leave you. I promise. I could NEVER leave my heart. You own me. You have no idea just how much you've become a part of me that I can't live without. A man can't survive without a heart. I can't survive without you."

Sam's stunned by Dean's emotional confession. He's also relieved. He echoes his heart perfectly. "That's exactly how I feel about you, De. Exactly."

Dean kisses Sam's chest while stroking his hardness.

Sam arches his back into Dean as he nibbles on Sam's nipples. His cock leaking more pre-cum.

Dean smiles. "I've never done this, but I've always wanted to with you."

Sam watches as Dean lifts Sam's cock and takes it into his mouth. Sam's so light headed he feels faint from the blood rush as Dean sucks his cock. Sounds come from him he hasn't heard himself make in a long time. Not even with Vincent was the pleasure this intense. Sam's voice is shakey, "I'm... I'm... gonna cum."

Dean stops with his pride swelling quite a bit. His first blow job and he has Sammy on the verge of cumming that fast.

Sam sees Dean's smirk as he stops and looks at his brother with a gloated pride. He smiles at Dean and places his hand on his cheek. "You're gorgeous."

Dean's cheeks blush and Sam loves it. "I want you inside me."

Dean's eyes get big. "What?"

Sam almost laughs. "It's okay. You want to, right?"

Dean thinks a second. "Yes, of course I do. Just show me." His face is very red now.

Sam sits up and kisses him. "You'll love it." There's a seriousness in their gaze. Sam takes a deep breath. His voice is a whisper, "We'll love it."

Dean reaches into his nightstand and pulls out a box of condoms and his bottle of lube.

Sam gets up out of bed. "Hold on a minute. I'll be right back."

Sam returns with a damp towel and a dry towel for later. He also retrieved his dildo.

Dean refrains from laughing at seeing the life-like penis replica. "So, you use that on yourself?"

Sam just nods. "Not very often. I got it not too long ago."

Dean's eyebrows shoot up. "Oh!" Dean finally understands that Sam must have gotten it to help relieve his sexual desires toward his brother. When it wasn't working, he found Vincent. That too failed. Now Sam is getting what he needs. Dean smiles because he's now also getting what he needs.

Sam lays back down on the bed and places a pillow up under his hips.

Dean is watching Sam in complete fascination.

Sam uses the lube and rubs it over his hole while looking at Dean. He then starts fingering his hole open slowly while stroking his cock.

Dean is sitting on his knees facing Sam on the bed. He takes his own cock into his hand and starts slowly jerking off as Sam finger fucks himself. "That's so hot Sammy."

Sam moans at Dean's praise. He inserts two fingers and starts stretching himself open more. Soon, he's stretched enough for his toy. He lubes it up and hands it to Dean. "Go ahead."

Dean takes it and first leans over to kiss Sam. While they kiss, Dean's very hard cock presses against Sam's hole.

Sam gasps into Dean's kiss. "Forget the toy! Lube up. I need you." Another deep kiss. "Do it now!" Sam's voice is desperate and full of passion.

Dean drops the toy and puts on a condom. He lubes up and positions himself at Sam's entrance.

He slowly pushes his cock inside Sam and they both look into each other's eyes. Both of them are tearing up. Not because of pain or doing something wrong. Their emotions are overwhelming them.

Dean's just wanting to remember this moment forever. The look on his little brother's face. They're deeply connected in every way. All Dean can say is, "I love you."

Sam feels Dean's body flush against him. His cock's all the way inside. He holds Dean in his arms, finally feeling whole. His soul feels at peace for once. Sam's fingers touch Dean's face. "We're..." Sam can't think anymore. He can hardly breathe.

"Complete."

Sam just nods.

Dean finished Sam's thought and his emotions open up even more like a flesh wound. He kisses his Sammy and starts moving his hips slowly. Slowly making love to his other half.

Sam wipes the stray tear that falls from Dean's eye. Sam manages to say, "I'm so in love with you." He watches Dean's reaction to every move and touch he gives him. Sam touches his face, neck and shoulders as he gradually moves his hips faster and deeper into Sam. Sam gives back with hip movements and nipple pinches.

Dean's hitting Sam's prostate. Sam moans at how good it feels. His hands go to his sides, gripping the covers as Dean continues to thrust against that perfect spot. He throws his head back against the pillow and arches his his neck. "Dean! Oh fuck yes!"

Dean's cock swells at Sammy's cries of pleasure. Both are very winded and starting to work up a sweat. He kisses Sam's arched neck and can taste Sam's salty sweat on his lips. He's concentrating on Sam's expressions, movements, sounds and words.

"Harder. I need you harder."

Dean repositions himself for better leverage and starts slamming his hips harder into his brother.

Sam grips Dean's back and ass leaving marks. The sound of skin slapping against skin echoes through the room along with their combined grunts and moans of pleasure.

Sam's cock has been bouncing on his abs. It's so hard and heavy. Dean hasn't touched it because he wants Sammy to last as long as possible, but the longer he watches it leaking, he wants to touch it. So he does.

Sam grips the bed covers again as Dean pounds into him perfectly. It feels amazing. If men can have multiple orgasms, Sam's had at least 10. His prostate is in overdrive. Dean starts stroking his cock. "Fuck Dean! I'm gonna cum!!"

Sure enough, Sam shoots his load all over himself. His orgasm is intense too. His whole body is rocked to it's very core. He can't breath or make a sound. His eyes and mouth are open wide and his face is one of pure bliss. Pure love for the man that's making love to him. His brother and soul mate. His De.

As soon as Sam can breathe, tears start falling. Especially at seeing Dean go to pieces in his arms.

Dean understands. He knows every emotion Sam's feeling. As soon as he saw Sam climax, he too found his release inside Sam as his body clinched down on his throbbing cock. Dean cries out his orgasm, "Sammy!! Fuck!"

Sam watches Dean shatter in awe. Dean's face, while looking at Sam and finding his piece of nirvana, makes Sam's heart want to explode. Sam wants this feeling to never end.

Dean collapses on top of Sam and rocks his hips some while still inside him. It makes them both tremble. Dean's still a bit hard and very sensitive, but enjoys the shocks it sends through his body. He even strokes Sam's semi-hard cock to watch him jerk and tremble at the sensitivity of being touched after such an intense orgasm.

Sam smiles through his tears. "You're sadistic."

"Feels good. Admit it. Let's you know you're alive." He kisses Sam's sweaty neck.

Sam turns his head and kisses Dean's salty lips. "YOU are why I'm alive."


	6. Porter, Indiana

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: At the end of this chapter you will see Dean ask Sam to top him and maybe understand why he's asking this. This chapter does not have Sam actually topping Dean just yet. It only happens once in this story and it's in Chapter 7 - "Deep Love & A Rogue Wolf" (the next chapter). I thank you for reading this story. ❤

Dean finally pulls out of Sam and tosses his condom. They clean up with the towels Sam brought before they began.

Dean positions himself on his back and insists that Sam lay on his chest. He wants to hold him and love on him.

Sam doesn't protest. He rests his head over Dean's heart and can't stop smiling as Dean fingers Sam's damp, but quickly drying, hair. Their legs intertwined and Sam's arms holding the love he was born for.

They fall asleep quickly and sleep deeply.

~~~~~

  
Sam wakes up on his side with Dean curled up against his chest. He doesn't want to move. He just watches his sleeping brother for as long as he can. His heart full of love and feeling as peaceful as Dean looks right now.

As if a sixth sense kicks in, Dean wakes up and looks at Sam who's looking at him in the almost dark room. "Are you staring at me while I sleep?"

Sam's fingers move over the side of Dean's face. Dean closes his eyes and savors Sam's touch. "Your peaceful rest is contagious. I felt very peaceful and it was nice. I'm still feeling serenity from you."

Dean grins. "In that case, you're forgiven. I've never had anyone tell me I give them feelings of peace and serenity. Anxiety and fear, sure. Never peace and serenity." He snorts.

Sam laughs. "Yeah, it's me. I'm weird, remember?"

Dean sits up and kisses Sam. It's soft and loving. "You're not weird. You're mine and perfect the way you are."

They look into each other's eyes for a while. A thousand things being said without being said.

"Come on. Let's go shower and I'll make us breakfast. You need to find us a case. I need to go after something. You know?" Dean grins.

Sam smiles. "Yeah. I do."

They shower and Sam lets Dean wash his hair. They don't have sex, but they do touch each other and enjoy the fact that it seems normal.

~~~~~

Dean makes blueberry pancakes. He's in an excellent mood. He cuts up fruit for Sam. Makes some bacon.

Sam finds a case in Porter, Indiana. It's not far from Gary, Indiana. 5 people have disappeared in less than a month. 2 people have been found dead. Reports state they were attacked by an unknown animal.

Dean is all smiles as Sam reads from his laptop about the local news reports. "Sounds good to me. After we eat, we should get going."

Sam closes his laptop and goes to stand behind Dean who's almost done plating the food. He kisses Dean behind his ear. "I love you."

Dean turns around and pulls Sam into a heated kiss.

Sam moans and pushes Dean against the counter, really getting into their kiss. Sam's hands moving over Dean's back.

Dean's right hand moves from Sam's hair to his neck. His other hand gripping the back of Sam's shirt.

Sam's hand inching up Dean's shirts in search of flesh.

They finally come up for air and look into each other's eyes.

Dean sighs, "Food's gonna get cold."

Sam just nods and backs away.

Dean serves up breakfast. He sits beside Sam at the table. His leg touching Sam's as they eat and talk about the case.

~¤~¤~¤~¤~¤~

  
Sam wakes up in the back seat of the Impala. He's in a lot of pain. The engine is roaring and he can hear Dean cursing as he swerves through Porter, Indiana traffic.

Dean hits the steering wheel with the palm of his hand. "COME ON!"

Sam coughs. It's painful and he tastes blood.

"Sammy?!" Dean looks through his rearview mirror at his brother.

Sam chokes out, "Slow down."

"No. I'm getting you to a hospital." He accelerates past several cars.

"You're gonna kill us on the way." He groans as Dean swerves to avoid a turning truck.

Dean hits his horn as he proceeds onto his destination. "Almost there Sammy."

They get to the hospital and Sam's taken inside.

Dean's a nervous wreck. A pack of werewolves. They've handled packs before, but these monsters were juiced up on something. They almost got Sam's heart out of his chest. It's a miracle he's still breathing.

Dean kisses Sam's forehead before they wheel him back for emergency surgery. "You'll be okay."

"I know." Sam touches Dean's face as he's wheeled off.

Dean knows there's blood on his face from Sam's touch. He doesn't care. He's already covered in blood as it is.

He moves the car. He comes back in and fills out the paperwork. All Dean can think about is how much better Sam is at this stuff than him.

While finishing up, a nurse approaches him. "Do you need to see a doctor?"

Dean looks at himself and seriously thinks on that. He gives the cute nurse a smile. "No. I'm okay. This is mostly my brother's blood."

"Oh. Okay." She hands him a packet of wet wipes. "You do have a laceration on your face. If you'd like us to look at it, let me know."

Dean accepts the wipes. "Thank you."

He goes to the desk and gives the paperwork to the receptionist. He then goes to the restroom.

He uses the toilet and cleans up as best as he can in the sink without leaving a bloody mess. The wipes help. He realizes the cut above his left temple should be stitched or at least butterfly bandaged.

He has to fill out more paperwork, but does so with little complaint. He's waiting to hear about Sam's operation. This keeps his mind occupied.

The kind nurse takes him back to stitch him up.

She notices some scrapes on his arms and cuts to his knuckles. "You've been fighting."

Dean sighs. "Yeah. My brother and I are under cover agents. We were working a case when we got jumped. We got the upper hand and, out of nowhere, a large dog attacked Sam. I thought he was going to die."

She can see he's very worried about his brother. She starts stitching his cut on his face after a quick anesthetic. Four stitches and the wound is sealed.

She takes the time to place antiseptic on his scraped up arms and the cuts to his knuckles. She places a gel on the knuckles of his right hand. "Do you want bandages on these?"

"No. Thank you though." Dean's thoughts are entirely with Sam.

The nurse can see his pain. "Let me go check on your brother for you. I'll be right back." She pats his shoulder.

Dean nods as she turns and leaves him in the treatment room.

A man walks into Dean's room. "Don't get up and don't reach for your gun."

He flashes werewolf glowing yellow eyes at Dean. "You really fucked up coming here hunter."

Dean's heart is hammering right now. There's nothing more he'd love to do than rip this guys lungs out.

"That being said, we don't want to kill you or your brother. Yes, you two have killed 6 of our pack members and should die for it, but we know who you are. We know that the Winchesters are better in the world than not. So listen."

"We had a problem with a rogue wolf that got some wild hair up his ass. He and his small pack wanted to run the show and challenge our alpha."

"They are the ones that started the killing and kidnappings in town, which they knew would attract hunters. They were hoping hunters would take out our alpha. You didn't, which is good. Problem is, the rogue son of bitch and his pack are still out there killing and causing mayhem."

"Now, I'm sorry about your brother and I hope he pulls through. I'm just here to give you a couple options:"

"One, help us kill this rogue bastard and return things to the peaceful way they've been for over 100 years."

"Or two, leave in peace and let us get back to trying to do the job ourselves. We know people are dying, but we're doing the best we can."

Dean sighs. "So, you're telling me that your pack and your alpha believe in eating farm animals instead of human hearts?"

He nods. "We haven't fed on humans since the Civil War. Bloody bodies were abundant then and easy to obtain. We gradually weaned ourselves off human hearts and started feeding off livestock."

"Why are you more powerful than typical lycan?"

The man arches his brow at Dean's correct terminology. "I shouldn't say, but I'm sure you've guessed. Our alpha is a direct descendant of Eve."

Dean nods. "Yeah. That explains it."

There's a knock at the door. The nurse enters. "Oh. Hello."

Dean quickly says, "He's an agent from the Bureau checking in."

She just nods at the tall dark man then turns her attention back to Dean. "Your brother is still in surgery. The cardiac surgeon is repairing torn arteries. It's microsurgery. He's recieved a lot of blood, but he's doing okay at this time. The surgeon said he's lucky because just one millimeters deeper with where a particular artery was cut and he wouldn't have made it. His pericardial sac was torn and arteries, but the heart muscle was only bruised and scraped." She places her hand on Dean's forearm where he has no wounds. "He'll pull through okay."

Dean takes a deep breath. "Thank you for checking on him for me."

"It was no problem." She smiles. "We're all finished here. You're free to go."

"Thanks."

She leaves the room.

Dean looks at the werewolf. "My name's Dean Winchester."

"Steven Soren." He holds his hand out in a friendly gesture.

Dean shakes his hand. "I'll help you out. Just need to wait till my brother's better."

"I understand." They stop shaking hands and Steven heads for the door. "Let me give you my number. Call me when you're ready. We look forward to working with you."

They exchange phone numbers.

"Oh, don't get offended. There's going to be cops posted outside your brother's hospital room. They're pack members and they'll be there for his protection. Since he was attacked, the rogue will want to finish him off. It's in their nature. They leave no victims alive. We intend to make sure your brother lives."

"Thank you." Dean hates this. "I have to say I'm sorry for those you lost that have never taken a human life. Sam and I have been hunters our entire lives. It's a learning process. We discovered that sometimes being a monster isn't what you are, it's what you chose to do."

"I couldn't have said it better. I'll see you soon." He leaves.

Dean stands alone in the room for a moment and closes his eyes. "I love you Sammy. Don't leave me. Not yet."

~~~~~

  
Sam makes it through surgery and spends a couple days in the ICU unconcious. Doctors tell Dean it's due to blood loss. He's expected to wake up and be perfectly fine however.

Dean doesn't leave Sam's side. The nurses find Dean's devotion to his brother admirable.

When no one is around, Dean gives Sam kisses on his his hand or face. He waits patiently for Sam to wake up. Tells Sam stories about hunts he went on while they were doing their own thing several years back.

Sam wakes up in a panic. "DEAN!"

Dean jumps up and gets into the bed beside Sam. Sam grips Dean tightly. "I died Dean!"

"No Sammy. You're okay." Dean touches his face in an attempt to calm him. "You're in the hospital and you're fine."

"I died and I had to run from the reapers. One almost had me." He's trembling as he holds Dean tighter and buries his face against Dean's chest. "They wanted to send me to hell! I found a way to hide. Why would they want to send me to hell, De?"

Dean kisses the top of Sam's head. "Shhhh. I got you. It was a nightmare. It wasn't real Sammy. Just a dream."

A nurse walks in. "He's awake."

Dean looks at her. "Yeah. He's having a panic attack."

"I saw that at my station." She points at his monitors that are flashing. "He needs to stay calm. I'm going to give him something to relax him." She injects something into Sam's I.V.

Dean feels Sam's body relax in his arms. "You feeling better now Sammy?"

Sam takes a deep breath. He sits back, away from Dean's chest and swallows. "I'm thirsty."

Dean gets up and pours a cup of water for Sam. He drinks it slowly while the nurse checks his vitals.

She's satisfied he's calm enough. "The doctor will be in at about 1:30 to see you. Maybe sooner now that you're awake. Try to stay relaxed. Are you in any pain?"

Sam moves his head side to side. "No."

"Okay sweetie. Just press the call button if you need me. I'll order you a lunch tray." She looks toward Dean. "I'll have them bring you one too."

Dean grins. "Thank you."

The nurse leaves.

Dean immediately returns to Sam's bed and sets his empty cup of water on the side table before laying beside him again.

Sam takes hold of Dean's face and kisses him. Dean kisses back, but pulls away before getting too deeply into it. He points to Sam's monitors. "Can't get your heart racing like that. They'll pump you full of tranquilizers to keep you calm. You had open heart surgery to repair torn arteries. You don't need stitches getting torn from your heart pounding."

Sam has been staring at Dean's face and touching his jaw and lips. Dean would think Sam's acting strange, but he gets it. When you get that close to death, you cherish those closest to you more. Dean just lets Sam do what he's doing.

"Are you sure I was dreaming?"

Dean moves his hand through Sam's hair. "Yes. I asked the surgeon if your heart stopped at any time during surgery. I had to know. He said it didn't. They were able to make all the repairs to your heart without having to stop it. You never died Sam." Dean kisses his forehead.

"Did you go back and annihilate the werewolves?" Sam grins.

Dean grins back. "No."

Dean tells Sam the whole story about what happened and why. That once Sam is healthy enough, they will help this good pack of werewolves kill the rogue, human killing, werewolf. Once he's dead his followers will return to their original pack or die.

~~~~~

  
The brothers get checked into a motel after Sam is released from the hospital several days later.

Sam's been instructed by his doctor to take it easy for at least 3 months. Give his wounds time to completely heal.

As soon as they enter the motel room, Dean stands just inside the door with his eyes closed. "Cas! Can you hear me now? We're at The Sunset Motel in Porter, Indiana. Room 22. Still needing your help here." Dean sighs watching Sam unpack.

Cas appears. "Hello Dean."

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?! SAM ALMOST DIED!!" Dean was about to hit him if Sam didn't stop him.

Cas turns away as he speaks. "I've been looking for Lucifer. I had him located, but he was gone when I arrived. People are dying in his wake. My apologies for not answering your call." He looks at Dean and then Sam. "How are you Sam?"

Sam places his hand over the huge scar on his chest. "I've been better."

Cas goes to Sam and touches his arm. He can sense his wounds. "You should sit."

Sam keeps his eyes on Cas's face as he sits on the side of the bed. Cas touches Sam's forehead. His hand glows and healing powers go through him to Sam's chest. Sam loses his breath for a moment and his chest hurts, but then it's all better. He feels his chest and the scar's gone. He smiles, "Thanks Cas."

"You're welcome." He loves both brothers and wouldn't want either to die.

Dean clears his throat while scratching the back of his neck. He feels bad for how he greeted Cas. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I know you don't serve me. You serve God. I get that. It's just that..."

"He's your brother. I understand. You love him. I'd be angry too. I will do my best to at least reply sooner." Cas is now standing in front of Dean. "You're my friend. You and your brother are my top priorities. Next to finding Lucifer, of course."

Dean grins. "Of course."

"Let me know if I can help. I'll be listening for you." Cas disappears.

Sam stands up and rushes into Dean's arms. He kisses him, pushing him against the front door of the motel. All of the pent up desire he's had inside of him for days finally comes flooding out. He wants nothing more than to feel his brother's touch on his body.

Dean willingly accepts all of Sam's affection. In fact, he jumps up into Sam's arms and wraps his legs around his waist as Sam kisses him with even more need. Sam moans as he grinds against Dean, pressing Dean's back into the door trying to get some friction.

Dean grips Sam's hair. "Take me to bed. I want you inside me." He nips at Sam's throat.

Sam swallows hard. "You sure?"

"Don't argue. Just do what I'm telling you for once." Dean's breathing hard. He wants to see and feel Sam making love to him. Giving himself over to him completely. What better way than to watch Sam come undone inside him. Dean's rock hard at the thought of it.

Sam carries Dean to bed, kissing his jaw and neck the whole time. He places him on his back. "Let me undress you." It's a request more than a demand.

Dean leans back with arms spread out. He relaxes wanting Sammy to do whatever his heart desires.


	7. Deep Love & a Rogue Wolf

Sam can't believe Dean wants him to top. He needs to give himself to his brother any way he possibly can. It's been way too long.

Sam starts undressing Dean. He removes his boots and socks first. He moves his hand up Dean's thigh as he removes the last boot.

Dean shifts some. His jeans becoming very uncomfortable around his very hard dick.

Sam cups Dean's hardness and watches as Dean moans then lifts his hips into Sam's hand wanting more. "Sammy." It's a pathetic plea that Sam finds fascinating coming from his no-nonsense, monster killing brother.

Sam continues his quest. He undoes Dean's belt and Jeans, then removes them. Dean moans as Sam pulls the denim down over his swollen cock. He then removes Dean's shirts with kisses up his torso, neck, chin and finally his lips.

Sam rubs Dean's straining cock over his underwear while kissing him. There's a good size wet spot on his boxer briefs displaying his need for Sam plain as day. "I've never seen you like this."

Dean makes their kiss deeper. He bites at Sam's lower lip as he pulls back. "I guess it's because I almost lost you again. I just..." He kisses Sam again, getting lost in the moment. Sam gets it.

Dean pulls Sam's shirts off. His hands move over Sam's chest. There's a faint line still showing on Sam's chest where Cas healed him. You'd have to be very close to see it. Dean leans up and kisses his chest, then presses his ear against it to hear Sam's heart. It's beating strong and Dean is eternally grateful.

Sam holds Dean's head to his chest for a little bit before going in for a passionate kiss. "For you. It beats for you, De."

Dean kisses Sam while he removes Sam's jeans and boxers. He's naked on the bed and on his knees in front of his brother.

Dean removes his own underwear and gets up on his knees in front of Sam. They embrace and the love they have for each other is intense. Sam becomes emotional as Dean holds him. "Sweetheart, It's okay. You're okay now."

Sam loves his endearment toward him. He feels Dean's possessiveness with that one word, _"Sweetheart"._ A word only said toward him in private moments like these.

As he kisses his brother, he's feeling a bit possessive as well. He wants to somehow claim Dean as his own right now.

Dean's gentle touches to his face are one of his weaknesses. He kisses Dean's throat and moves down to his chest.

He pushes Dean down onto the bed. His lips and tongue teasing Dean's nipples and chest. His fingers moving over Dean's abs and closer to his throbbing cock.

Dean arches his back against Sam's hand. He gasps, "I need you Sam." as Sam touches his cock for the first time in days.

Sam strokes his very rigid cock from base to tip. He sucks it for just a moment, eyes never losing their connection. This is part of Sam claiming his brother as his own. He loves how his brother tastes.

Sam thinks while looking into Dean's eyes and sucking his cock, _"Yes, you're mine."_ The green in Dean's eyes are like emeralds on fire. Sam releases Dean's cock with a final lick around the crown.

Dean's mouth is dry as he swallows hard. He pants, "You're killing me."

"I've only begun, big brother." The heat in Sam's hooded gaze makes Dean shutter.

Sam kneels between Dean's thighs, hikes up his ass with his legs over Sam's broad shoulders and then presses his tongue to Dean's hole. Again, Sam is thinking _"Mine!"_ as he gets into eating Dean's hole all wet and sloppy.

Dean gasps over and over again at how good it feels. He can't think right now. All he can do is feel and breathe.

Sam does this for a while. He eventually slides his finger inside and watches as Dean moans. His face full of desperation.

"Gah! More!" Dean moans as Sam's tongue leaves, but welcomes the new pressure of Sam's fingers. Dean sees Sam's multicolored eyes and marvels at his handsome face. "Mmm that's it." He squeezes the base of his cock again to keep from blowing his load too soon. He wants this moment to last.

Sam slides a second finger in, spitting on his hole making sure it stays wet while stretching Dean open. Dean squeezes his red, very hard and leaking cock while Sam works his ass open. "Feels so good." Dean's voice is deep and winded.

Sam sets his brother down and quickly finds his lube and a piece of gum. He places a pillow under Dean's hips. After kissing Dean senseless (and Dean stealing the gum from his mouth), he uses a lot of lube and gets up to a third finger fucking his hole. Sam stretches his brother's hole open on long fingers. Dean's reaction doesn't disappoint.

"Fuck Sam!" Dean arches his back. His cock straining in his fist as Sam works his hole open. Sam's clearly hitting just the right spot as he leans down for a kiss.

Dean grabs hold of Sam's face and kisses him with a fierce hunger. Fingers move so they can tug at Sam's hair.

Sam discovers Dean swallowed his gum. Oh well. The kiss makes up for it. Dean sucks on Sam's tongue while Sam finger fucks his brother.

Dean finally cries out, "Sammy please!" It sounds so needy.

Sam makes the split second decision to slide his aching cock right into Dean's lubed and ready hole. Just a desperate need to claim what's his and get as close as he can to his other half.

Dean grabs hold of Sam's whole body and clings tightly to him as Sam fills him up. Sam is rather large and feeling him suddenly inside him, Dean is breathless and trembling. As Dean holds Sam he's thinking, _"You're mine. THIS is where you belong. Inside me. You're a part of me. Stay right here forever."_

"You okay?" Sam asks as he kisses Dean's neck. His fingers moving over his hair and shoulders.

Dean leans back, looking up into Sam's eyes. A curtain of hair surrounding his beautiful face. "Perfect." Both of them have dilated pupils and so much love for each other. Sam smiles and the dimples make Dean's heart beat a little faster.

Sam moves his hips and starts really making love to Dean. Dean places a hand on Sam's face as Sam thrusts harder. "I love you." Comes out of Dean so easily. His hand moves down Sam's chin and throat to his chest. He feels his brother's heart racing and it makes him smile.

Dean watches Sam flex his muscles for a while. His lean hips and abs flexing with each thrust while his pecs and biceps strain above him. Dean's fingers move over every mucsle admiring his brother. Feeling the pleasure his body's giving him with every forward thrust. He wants to feel Sam beneath him. Dean pushes Sam onto his back with some effort.

Sam's a bit surprised by Dean's move. Dean seemed so content and ready to cum just as he was.

Dean rides Sam nice and slow at first. He likes the feel of Sam's girth beneath him. How Sam's cock fills him up completely. Being able to touch his chest and feel his heart beating so strong under his finger tips. Fuck yeah, this is perfection.

Sam looks like he's REALLY enjoying this. His cock seem bigger in Dean's ass. "You like this Sammy?" He rubs Sam's nipples.

Sam gasps. "Ahhh! Yeah. I like this a lot." He grips Dean's ass moving his hips up and down faster. "Ride my cock hard De!"

Dean gets into it. He grinds and rides Sam hard and deep. Sam's cock hitting Dean's prostate perfectly when he leans back a little. Dean's cock slapping against Sam's abs with each downward fall on Sam's cock. Dean trembles with what feels like small orgasms from prostate stimulation.

Sam leans up and kisses the love of his life. "You're a trembling mess." He wipes the sweat from Dean's face.

Dean smiles through his uncontrollable tremors. He has a desperate need to cum right now. His cock is straining and his body is in need.

Sam lifts Dean and places him so his legs are around Sam's hips as Sam gets out of bed. While still inside Dean, he lays him back on the bed and leans over to kiss him as he starts moving his hips slowly.

Dean clings to Sam, kissing him with so much love. Their kiss breaks as they gasp for breath. "Harder Sammy! Fuck me!"

Sam pulls back and grips Dean's hips firmly. He's slamming his cock deep and hard inside Dean. Sweat pouring off of them both.

Dean is arching his back. At first he reaches for Sam's body then his hands grip the covers beside him. "I'm cumming Sam! Oh fuck! Oh fuck!" Dean's whole lower body clenches up with an intense orgasm that shakes him to his core. He doesn't even touch his cock as he cums all over his abs and chest. His eyes stay fixated on his Sammy.

Sam falls over the edge right after his brother. Sam doesn't say a word though. He just feels Dean's body crushing down in orgasm on his aching cock. It triggers his release. He thrusts faster a few times through his climax. Gasping and feeling the intensity of it.

In fact, the intensity of the whole moment has Sam suddenly in an emotional state. He pulls Dean up into his arms, still inside him and kisses him like he might die. He falls to his knees beside the bed while holding Dean in his arms and loving on him. He can hardly breathe, "I can't...love you...enough."

Dean kisses the top of Sam's forehead as he feels Sam slide from inside him. Sam clings to him tighter, holding him around his chest. They catch their breath some as Dean moves Sam's wet mop of hair from his brow to look into his eyes. "Sweetheart, you love me perfectly. Just as I love you." He kisses him. "Come on. Let's go get cleaned up." Dean stands up with a slight groan. Oh he'll be sore for a while.

Sam gets up off the floor and they go shower together.

They get into the shower and Sam lets Dean bathe him. Dean is slow and methodical while washing Sam's body and hair. He worships every part of Sam and Sam loves it. By the time Dean's done, Sam's at full erection and Dean can't stop touching it.

Sam washes Dean with just as much care. Once finished, he stands in front of Dean and strokes Dean's cock. Dean strokes Sam. They lean against each other while jerking each other off. Sam kisses Dean's neck. "I love you." He moan's against Dean's flesh.

Dean is panting hard. He kisses at Sam's shoulder. "Can't get enough." Dean thrusts faster into Sam's large fist. Right as he cums, he bites into Sam's shoulder and moans out his orgasm.

Sam feels the sharp pain of Dean's bite and it only brings him to orgasm faster. "Dean! Oh fuck!" Sam cums with one hand holding Dean's head to his shoulder for the bite. The other stroking Dean over the edge.

They kiss afterward and embrace. Dean touches Sam's face and confesses, "I love you and for some reason I can't stop saying it. We just never say how we feel. Now, it's all I want to say to you over and over. I want it to be the last words you hear. ... You know. ... Just in case." Dean finally just kisses Sam to stop himself from saying anything else. He feels drunk on his brother's love.

Sam's in shock at Dean's words. His brother has literally said what his heart was thinking. "Me too, De. I love you more than words can say."

They finish their shower and return to the unspoiled bed without getting dressed. Dean lies on his back and has Sam lay his head across his chest. Dean holds Sam in his arms. "Dream about us." He kisses the top of Sam's head.

"You too." Sam snuggles in and Dean smiles. They fall asleep quickly and sleep more deeply than they have in a while.

~~~~~

  
Sam wakes up to Dean handing him a cup of coffee made just to his liking. Sam is laying completely naked against the headboard of the bed as he sips his coffee. Dean just stands at the foot of the bed and looks at Sam.

"Like what you see?" Sam gives Dean a crooked grin.

"Yes." Dean is very matter-of-fact with his reply. "Get dressed or you're gonna get attacked. I'm not joking."

Sam sighs as he gets up and heads for his clothes that he placed in the second drawer of the motel dresser. Dean stands behind Sam and wraps his arms around him. Hands over Sam's chest as he buries his face in Sam's hair. "You're mine."

Sam leans back into Dean's embrace. He closes his eyes and places his hands over Dean's on his chest. "Forever yours. Only yours, Dean." Sam turns and kisses Dean, holding him tight.

Dean holds Sam just as close. Their kiss is full of hunger, but they don't have time to make love this morning. They'll have to wait till later.

Sam quickly gets dressed while Dean finishes packing up his stuff. Sam soon has everything else packed up and they check out of their motel.

~~~~~

Dean talked with the alpha werewolf, Dennis Lars, on his cell and they are meeting at the location Dennis designated. It's a roadhouse and Dean goes in prepared to fight. Sam goes in prepared to negotiate. It's just how the two brothers think.

Just inside the doors they're greeted by Steven. The man that Dean met at the hospital. "So glad you two made it." Steven shakes hands with each of them. "We'll assume you're armed and you assume we're armed. Okay?"

"No problem here." Dean grins.

Sam shrugs.

"Just so you know, this place is like a sanctuary. People come here to hide from those chasing them. Of course mostly in our lycan world, but some are outside our.. "monsterdom" for lack of a better word."

Dean glances at a beautiful blonde sitting at the bar as they walk past. Dean notices that she keeps her eyes on Steven the whole time.

The three men walk into a room at the back of the roadhouse. Sam and Dean following Steven, who enters a code to gain entry.

Once inside, they walk to a door at the end of a long corridor. Inside is a beautiful corner office. It has the illusion of being in a tall highrise office building. The view out the windows is amazing! The skyline is Paris, France! You can see the Eiffel Tower and the city below.

A door opens from inside the suite and a man that stands about 6'4" approaches Dean. He's got blonde hair that's very curly, but cut short on the sides and long on top. His eyes are ice blue. "Hello. Sorry to keep you waiting. My name's Dennis Lars." He has a Dutch accent.

Dean shakes hands with Dennis. "Dean Winchester. This is my brother, Sam."

Sam shakes his hand. "Nice meeting you."

Dennis smiles. "Likewise. Please have a seat. Let me get you something to drink. Water, coffee, soda?"

"Coffee. Black is good." Dean could use caffeine right now.

"Uh, water is fine." Sam's not really thirsty.

A lady appears with Dean's coffee and a cold bottled water for Sam.

She hands a coffee to Dennis. He accepts with a smile then turns his attention to the Winchester brothers. "We know where the rouge lycan is hiding. He has supporters. 16 to be exact. They are camping around his home thinking he's hiding there. He's not, but it doesn't keep his followers from awaiting his instruction. They'll do anything he asks including suicide. Once the rogue dies, all his followers will know it. The magnetic pull will vanish and they will no longer be a threat." He awaits Dean and Sam's reactions. There isn't one. He continues. "The rogue is hiding at this location." He gives Dean a piece of paper with the location written on it.

"Are there going to be others from your pack at this location or are you going to leave it to me and Sam? I highly suggest you just leave it to us." Dean is serious.

Dennis nods in agreement. "We will not go to this location unless you call us there, Dean Winchester. This rogue is expecting you at some point because of what he did to Sam. Let me know if you need us. You have my number."

They finish their coffee.

"My assistant, Susan, will show you out."

The lady that brought Dean and Sam their drinks leads them out of the room.

~~~~~

  
Dean and Sam arrive at the location provided by Dennis.

It's a biker bar, but it's closed to the public. Dean parks the Impala a distance away because werewolves have exceptional hearing. He wants to have some element of surprise.

Dean and Sam walk to the back of the bar. Sam has a duffle full of gear. Dean uses a pick to unlock the back door and the guys go inside. Lights are out and the place is silent. The guys use pin size flashlights to navigate the kitchen to the front of the bar.

"Say fellas. Been wonderin' when you'd show up." The voice is deep and comes from across the bar.

"You can stop wonderin'. You almost killed my brother." Dean's voice is deep.

"Yeah. About that. Next time there won't be an almost." He growls.

Dean twirls a silver blade in his hand. "Come on puppy and get some!"

Sam chambers a silver round in his pistol.

A giant werewolf suddenly appears and jumps Dean. Dean stabs it in the gut, but misses it's heart. The lycan yells in agony at having a 6 inch long, 3 inch wide silver blade stuck in his gut. Dean even twists the blade. Dean's reflexes are quick. He pulls the blade out right before teeth were about to chomp his shoulder.

The wolf howls in agony as Sam is suddenly behind him and lobs his head off with one quick swipe of his machete. The wolf never saw or heard him coming.

Brothers working together to bring down  
the monster-of-the-day.

Dean smirks. "The family business. It's what we do."

Sam laughs at Dean's remark.

A couple werewolves walk in. They see their dead leader and flee.

"I guess they'll get the word out that this asshat's dead." Dean nudges Sam. "Get some pics so we can torch this piece of shit and get out of here."

Sam photos the body and head. He sends the pics to Dennis. Dennis confirms that the brothers did in fact kill the rogue he's been after.

The brothers drag the body and head out behind the bar to the dumpster where they salt and burn the bastard. They watch as people flee on motorcycles while they stand beside the burning dumpster. Not one werewolf challeges them. All are cowards that will most likely run back to Dennis Lars and his pack. Will he be merciful? That's not for the Winchesters to decide.

Sam will keep a watchful eye on Porter, Indiana. If humans keep disappearing or "animal attacks" keep occurring, the Winchesters will be back and they'll know who to take out next.

The rogue werewolf is burned and they're able to head for the bunker and take a well needed rest. Finally!

 


	8. Mary's Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: This chapter will start in Season 10 where we left off in chapter 7. Mid-chapter the story will shift from Season 10 to Season 12. All the remaining chapters will be from Season 12. Please remember that this story is canon divergent. Although some of the story being told might come straight from the show, a lot will be altered on purpose. Thanks for reading. ❤

Sam wakes up with a smile. He's in Dean's empty bed stinking of sweat and sex. His body is aching, but he doesn't mind. He grabs Dean's pillow and holds it. He takes a deep breath inhaling Dean's scent. It's enough to make him hard and in need of Dean's touch. Sam moans as he breathes in his brother's scent some more with his eyes closed. "Fuck, I'm so in love with you and you have no idea."

"I have some idea Sammy. I'm crazy in love with you too." Dean's standing beside the bed watching Sam.

Sam opens his eyes and sees Dean standing beside him. He quickly jumps out of bed and wraps his arms around Dean. He kisses him with a hunger, a need that comes from deep in his soul. He needs Dean like he needs air.

Dean responds just as desperate and needy as Sam. Even though they've been together their whole lives and as lovers for a while, their love affair still seems so new and perfect that every touch, movement, kiss, embrace or showing of affection is just what each other needs. They are perfect together in every way. Two halves of the same whole.

Dean brushes Sam's hair from his face and looks into his eyes. "I made food. You hungry?" He kisses Sam's cheek.

Sam nuzzles Dean's whiskered cheek as he kisses him. "Always. I'm insatiable." Sam places Dean's hand on his own hard cock.

Dean kneels in front of Sam, who's completely naked, and takes his hard cock into his mouth. He sucks and licks on Sam's dick, enjoying Sam's reactions.

Sam gasps at first. Soon he's thrusting into Dean's mouth. "Fuck. So good." Dean takes Sam deep down his throat and Sam gasps. "I'm gonna cum, De."

Dean loves the way Sam's voice trembles when he talks right now. He's a wreck and right on the edge of falling to pieces. Dean has been doing all the things that Sam likes. Sucking him just the way he likes it, which took time for Dean to learn. Touching Sam's balls and chest. Rubbing his nipples and not pinching them. Remembering these things about his lover are what brings Sam to orgasm a lot sooner than Dean expected.

Sam feels Dean take his cock deep down his throat once more and his hands move over his chest in circles. He looks into Dean's eyes that are watering some and that's it for Sam. He grips Dean's hair. He feels his balls tighten up as he cums down the back of Dean's throat with several surges of cum being released. His whole body in a state of repose and ecstasy. He swallows then pants the name he cherishes more than his own, "Dean!"

Dean sucks Sam's hard cock dry. He stands up and holds a weak and completely sated Sam in his arms as he tries catching his breath. "I love you so much."

Sam sighs. "I love you." He hugs Dean tight. "You're mine."

Dean is all smiles. "Come on Sweetheart. You came, so I know you're hungry. Let's go eat before it gets cold."

Sam lets Dean go and looks him in the eyes.

Dean's face is flushed from giving Sam head. He rolls his very green eyes at Sam. "What?"

Sam touches Dean's cheek. "You're so beautiful."

Dean pushes at Sam's chest. "Get dressed Romeo!" He then goes to the kitchen.

Sam does as he's told. Gets dressed and then goes to the kitchen. The lights are off and candles are glowing. Sam smells turkey and well...Thanksgiving. He wonders if it's a holiday and knows it isn't. He then sees Dean placing a turkey at a table that's fully dressed like it's Thanksgiving. Lit candles decorate the table and placed throughout the kitchen. Dean even used a really nice golden colored table cloth with matching napkins.

Sam looks at his own attire. Gray sweats and an old burgandy t-shirt that says, "A Vulcan in the streets. A Klingon in the sheets." He laughs, "I suddenly feel under dressed."

Dean looks up from the table he's been setting. He's all smiles. "You're fine. Come sit down."

Sam goes to the table and sits where Dean tells him to. "This looks amazing! I can't believe you did all this while I was sleeping."

Dean can't stop smiling. "I confess. I did slip you a Mickey. I wanted to make sure you slept for 6 hours giving the turkey time to cook."

Sam gets concerned. "A Mickey?"

"Keep your shirt on. I just gave you melatonin. 3mg worth. At least one of us is well rested. Right?" He leans down and kisses Sam.

Sam holds on to the back of Dean's neck and deepens their kiss.

Dean has his hands on Sam's shoulders as he pulls away. He looks into Sam's eyes full of colors and love. "I could stand here looking into your eyes forever."

Sam is looking into Dean's eyes. "Same here, but the food would get cold."

Dean breaks their trance and picks up the carving knife. "Alright Miss Tanya. Let's get you butchered."

Sam arches an eyebrow. "Miss Tanya?"

Dean glances over at Sam as he carves the turkey. He smiles and keeps carving. "Yeah. She was the loosest woman I've ever been with. Stuffing this turkey reminded me of her."

Sam laughs so hard he almost knocks over his place setting. "Oh my God! Are you serious?"

Dean loves hearing Sammy laugh. "Hell yes I'm serious! Her vaj was the size of a dumpster! She was a real whore. I got tested and was lucky to be clean after being with Miss Tanya. I was in my teens and learned the difference between ladies and well... ladies like Miss Tanya." Dean laughs at his memories of his youth.

"I've never been with a woman like that." Sam watched Dean place white meat turkey on his plate.

"You're lucky." Dean pecks Sam on the forehead once he finishes placing turkey on his plate. He then puts turkey on his own plate. The stuffing was removed and placed on a serving dish on the table.

"This looks great Dean." Sam is all smiles.

"Well, dig in!" Dean waves at everything.

Both men start serving themselves from the dishes on the table. Stuffing, roasted vegetables (for Sam), candied yams, mashed potatoes (for Dean), green beans, cranberry sauce, turkey gravy (no giblets), eggnog chilling on ice, bourbon, coffee and water.

For dessert Dean got a pecan pie for Sam and a cherry pie for himself. He also got some vanilla ice cream for himself and frozen yogurt for Sam.

Dean really planned everything out perfectly.

The bourbon spiked eggnog was a nice touch that both men enjoyed. It reminded them of holidays without presents or a tree. Thanksgivings without turkey or big meals. The two of them always managed to celebrate holidays by getting some eggnog, a bottle of whiskey and KFC.

Sam grins as he sits back from the table with a full stomach. He sips his eggnog then holds up his glass to Dean. "Reminds me of holidays in endless motels."

Dean nods. "Me too. I can't wait for the holidays to come around just for the eggnog." He grins.

"So, why did you decide to do Thanksgiving early?" Sam sighs because he ate too much.

"You know me." Dean shrug.

Sam smirks. "You couldn't wait."

"I couldn't wait."

 

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NOTE: Time passes along. We were in Season 10. We're now in Season 12. Dean no longer has the Mark of Cain and Amara gave Dean his mother, Mary, back as a gift.  
(Time jumps from Oct. 2014 to Oct. 2016)

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It's all Sam and Dean can do to hide their love for each other from their suddenly raised from the dead mother.

They have a good idea that she may suspect that they are closer than brothers should be. Especially the way Dean reacted to Sam being kidnapped by the British Men of Letters. Also, the way Dean reacted to seeing Sam tied up and tortured.

Once alone at the bunker, in Dean's bedroom, Dean held Sam and kissed him for over an hour. Sam just rested in Dean's arms and let Dean's affections mend his battered soul. That evil witch of a woman, Toni, tried to break Sam. Sam was too strong for her. Sam tells Dean everything Toni and her henchmen did.

Dean wants blood. He wants it NOW.

Sam calms Dean. "Patience. We have to strategize and go about this properly. She has superiors. They need to fall too."

Dean kisses the top of Sam's head. "You're right."

Sam showers and then Dean does.

The guys meet Mary in the kitchen for dinner. She got store bought meatloaf, potato salad and pie. This shattered Dean's childhood memories of a mom that cooked homemade meals from scratch. Mary wasn't Betty Crocker and Dean had no idea.

After dinner the guys briefly go to Dean's room. Sam kisses Dean goodnight and then goes to his own room.

Mary comes to Sam's room. "Can we talk?"

"Ah, sure." Sam invites Mary to sit on the bed while he pulls up his desk chair and takes a seat in front of her.

Mary takes a deep breath. "First of all let me say how proud I am of you and your brother. You both have accomplished so much. I'm truly overwhelmed."

Sam smiles. "Thanks."

"I also need to apologize to you Sam." Mary starts crying. "I just couldn't live without him."

Sam knows she's talking about the deal she made with Azazel to save John's life and in turn let Azazel come into Sam's nursery when Sam turned 6 months old. Azazel "unbroke" John's neck back in 1973. Then on 11-2-83 Azazel came to Sam's crib dripping blood from his wrist into baby Sam's mouth. Azazel warned Mary in 1973 to stay out of the nursery. She came into the nursery anyway and Azazel killed her, burning her on the ceiling. Her children were left without a mom. Until now anyway.

Sam bites his tongue. John, he and Dean lived without her. Oh how John suffered. Sam turns around and grabs John's journal from his desk. He gets up and sits next to her on the bed. He hands her the journal. "You should read this."

She looks at it. "John's journal?" She looks up at Sam surprised it's so thick and worn.

"Yeah. Dean and I kept it going. It's got our life story in it. It starts with dad's writings. Some of it is lore. Well, a lot of it is lore." Sam laughs nervously. He then leans toward his mother and holds her hand. "Mom, I forgave you a long time ago. If you hadn't said yes, Dean and I wouldn't exist. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people would have died because Dean and I wouldn't have been there to save them." Sam looks down. He still feels guilty over the apocalypse and freeing Lucifer.

Mary hugs Sam. Sam hugs her back. "I love you Sam. You'll always be my baby boy."

"I know mom." Sam embraces her a moment longer then kisses her cheek.

She stands up and Sam stands up too. He hands her the journal she left on the bed. "Mom, I look forward to getting to know you." Sam looks at this woman standing in front of him. His mom. He has a mom now.

Mary suddenly feels exposed or like she's standing before her son naked. How odd! She feels the need to leave. "Well, I have some reading to do." She holds up John's journal. "Sleep well." She gets on her toes and pecks him on the cheek.

Sam hugs her once more. "Goodnight mom." He kisses her cheek once again.

She leaves for her room.

Sam goes to bed with his mind running on overdrive making it impossible for him to sleep. After 3 hours of tossing and turning, Sam sneaks into Dean's room.

Dean is also awake. He's stroking one out because he too is trying to find a way to pass out. He sees Sam come into his room and it makes him smile.

Sam gets into bed with Dean. They kiss quietly. Sam whispers, "Do you have any melatonin?"

"Melatonin! I forgot all about that!" Dean rolls his eyes in the dark. "Yeah. Hang on." He gets out of bed. He's naked and his dick is hard as hell. He goes to his dresser and pulls out a bottle. He takes out 2 pills then goes to hand the bottle to Sam.

Sam gets on his knees and takes Dean's cock into his mouth. He starts sucking him off.

Dean almost gasps too loudly. He quickly grips the dresser to keep his balance releasing the pills from his hand. He sets the bottle on the dresser too.

Bitting his bottom lip, he lets Sam give him what he needs. He fucks into Sam's throat and Sam lets him. They do their best to be quiet.

Sam has his cock out while kneeling in front of Dean. He sucks Dean's huge cock while stroking his own. Sam rubs his thumb over the head of his cock. He moans at how good it feels, but not too loudly. He takes Dean's spit slick cock into his hand and jerks it fast. He whispers, "Cum for me Dean."

Dean lets go of the dresser and holds onto Sam's shoulders as Sam strokes his spit slick cock just right. As soon as Sam whispers in trembling words, "Cum for me Dean." It's all Dean needed to go over the edge. He leans down so he can smell Sam's hair as he cums. Sam works his cock perfectly and Dean ends up a complete mess. He goes to his knees and kisses Sam.

While Dean is kissing him, Sam finds his release. Their lips part as Sam gasps, his whole body strains and then he trembles in Dean's arms. Sam kisses Dean's neck. "I love you." Sam's voice is very deep and shakey.

"I love you more." Dean holds Sam in a crushing embrace. "This is impossible Sammy."

"It'll be okay Dean. We'll find a way. You'll see." Sam kisses his neck again.

Dean turns and kisses Sam possessively. He's very aggressive. So much so, he inadvertently causes Sam's lip to crack and bleed. Sam doesn't care. He keeps kissing. Dean tastes the copper of blood and realizes what he did. He backs away. "I'm sorry Sammy."

"Don't be. I'm not. I'm fine." He takes Dean's hand into his. "Remember that I'm yours and you're mine."

Dean realizes that Sam needs reassuring and a feeling of "oneness" with his brother. Dean pulls Sam into another fierce hug. "You're mine. Always."

Sam can feel his heart pounding. It's a good feeling. "As much as I'd love to wake up in your arms, I need to go to my own bed." Sam stands up as soon as Dean lets go of him.

Dean stands up. He kisses Sam once more. He then hands Sam the melatonin pills he came for. "I'll be dreaming of you tonight."

Sam smiles at the thought while he accepts the pills Dean gives him. "Well then, let's just dream of each other." Sam places his hand on Dean's chest. "I love your heart and soul."

Dean places his hand on Sam's chest. "I love your soul and heart."

Dean cleans the mess they made before taking some melatonin and passing out with thoughts of his brother on his mind.

Sam goes to the restroom and cleans up before returning to his own room. He takes the melatonin and is out in less than 30 minutes.

~~~~~

  
Sam's on a beautiful beach. He throws a frisbee and his dog, Bones, (a beautiful golden retriever) runs to catch it and brings it back. "Good boy Bones!" Sam has the frisbee and tosses it just as Dean comes walking up to him only wearing dark blue swim shorts.

Sam smiles. "Hey stud. Do I have to come up with $500 in cash or can I make payments?"

Dean laughs. "Hey, I've never charged you before have I?" He winks as he wraps his arms around Sam.

Sam embraces Dean. "Good because we're broke."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. "Close your eyes."

Sam closes his eyes.

"Okay. Now open them."

Sam opens his eyes and he's no longer on a beach. He and Dean are in a huge manson. This house has to be worth millions. Dean takes Sam's hand and leads him up a long staircase to the second floor.

They find the master bedroom and then the master bath. Dean lets go of Sam's hand and starts drawing a bath in the huge garden tub.

The bathroom is the size of a normal master bedroom. The walls are painted a very pale blue. There's a walk-in shower with multi-jets in it. It has a digital keypad that looks fun. There's a sauna! The vanity is made of white marble. It has 2 sinks. The wall above the vanity is a mirror.

The tub that's being filled is white marble and oval shaped. The fixtures are gold in color, just as all the fixtures in the bathroom are. Above the fixtures is a huge window. The view outside the window is breathtaking. You can see mountains in the distance and vineyards in the foreground. The sky is blue as can be.

The tub is full and Dean removes his swim shorts. He gets in and smiles at how warm the water is. "Come on in Sammy. The water is perfect."

Sam removes his swim shorts and joins his brother. At first he sits across from Dean taking in the moment. Letting the warm water seep into him with his eyes closed. Suddenly, for no reason, he feels alone. He feels as if darkness is surrounding him. He shivers.

Dean is wrapping his body around Sam and holding him. "Sammy, look at me."

Sam opens his eyes and finds he's sitting on Dean's lap. Dean's arms are around him and fingers in his hair. Sam sighs at how good this feels. He looks into Dean's eyes.

"I love you little brother." Dean kisses Sam and Sam kisses him back with want and desire.

Sam feels Dean harden beneath him and starts moving his hips against Dean's erection.

Dean takes Sam's cock into his hand and strokes him. He watches Sam as he moans at how good Dean's touch feels.

Sam takes Dean's face with both hands and kisses him. He then shocks Dean by slowly impaling himself on Dean's cock.

Dean throws his head back as pleasure suddenly fills him. Sam is riding his big brother and Dean can hardly breathe.

"That's it De. Fill me up." Sam kisses Dean.

Sam is lost to his brother utterly and completely. Dean touches Sam's chest, shoulders and neck. Sam moves up and down on Dean's cock a little bit faster.

Dean grips Sam's ass and thrusts up into him with quick upward thrusts. Each time Dean is hitting Sam's prostate.

"Fuck De! Ummhh!" Sam grips Dean tighter. His body shaking from the pleasure Dean's giving him. "I'm cumming! Dean!" Sam cums in the water without being touched. Dean continues to fuck Sam hard.

Dean grunts. He holds Sam tight in his arms as he too cums deep inside Sam. His voice is muffled against Sam's shoulder as he climaxes, "Sam. Fuck."

Sam holds Dean's head to his shoulder as Dean slowly thrusts a few more times. "Sammy. My Sam."

Sam rocks in time with Dean's final thrusts, both of them completely spent. He holds Dean, cradling his head against his shoulder. "I got you brother. I'm never letting go."


	9. Fierce Sam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: Confession. I forgot about this bathroom scene. My bad... or good, depending on how you look at it. However, this explains EXACTLY why Sam can't be top when it comes to his brother. It just doesn't work. (Tags have been added.) I'm posting chapter 10 tonight as an added bonus. Thanks again for sticking with this story. ❤

Sam wakes up and looks at his clock. It's 9:26am. He sighs feeling content. Then he realizes his boxers are a bit messy. "Really?" He sits up. "I'm too old for this shit." He then closes his eyes and remembers his dream. "Okay. Maybe I'm not too old."

He's really confused about his dream because, in his dreams, he's usually the one asking if he can fuck Dean.

They've been lovers for years now and Dean's only let him fuck him once and that was because he thought Sam was going to die. Dean said that when they left the hospital he was still afraid Sam was going to die because he was so weak and needed months to heal and they didn't have months to fight this rogue werewolf. So, when Cas healed him, it moved something in Dean so deeply he needed Sam in a real way. At least that's how Dean explained it.

Ever since that one time, Sam hasn't really thought about topping Dean again, except in his dreams. He's truly content with things the way they are. At least he thinks he is.

Sam sighs as he gets up. He goes to the bathroom, cleans himself and gets dressed in clean clothes (including clean boxers). Afterwards, he goes and pours himself some coffee.

Dean suddenly wraps himself around Sam and kisses him. Sam smiles. "Where's mom?"

"She left." Dean shrugs.

He gives Sam the letter she wrote basically saying she needs to go "find herself" and has no idea how long she'll be gone.

"Seems our mother is a piece of work. Just like our old man." Dean smirks as he sips his coffee.

Sam just sips his coffee and nods in agreement. He sets the letter down and wraps his arm around his brother. "At least we have the place to ourselves again." He nuzzles his temple against Dean's cheek.

"Hello Dean."

Sam and Dean quickly part at the sound of Cas' voice.

"Cas, where have you been?" Dean is legitimately concerned.

Cas approaches Dean. "The British Men of Letters have set up a headquarters not far from here. They're systematically taking out vampires and werewolves. They've recruited American hunters to help them."

Sam asks, "Why?"

"I'm trying to figure that out. All the property they own has angel warding surrounding it. Even their property in England. They're hiding secrets that they don't want angels and possibly hunters to know about." Cas seems deeply troubled.

Dean is in deep thought. "Well, keep looking if you will Cas. Maybe you'll find a weakness in their defenses."

Cas nods. "Okay. By the way, congratulations on your consummation. It's about time really. You two were born for each other." Cas looks at Sam then at Dean. "Nothing to be ashamed of. Angels mate with their siblings all the time." He shrugs then vanishes.

Dean looks at Sam. "I though angels didn't..."

Sam smiles. "Angels lie." He sips his coffee and then shrugs. "Who knew?"

Dean seems betrayed somehow. He whispers under his breath, "Son of a bitch."

Dean returns to giving Sam affection. Sam doesn't mind. He even laughs at the way Dean grabs his ass. "Are you horny?"

Dean sucks a kiss against Sam's neck. "Mhh huh."

Sam bites at his bottom lip and lets Dean devour his neck and collarbone. Dean's hand slides into Sam's boxers and takes hold of his erection. "Mmm Dean."  
  
Dean moves his lips against Sam's jaw. "You want me?"

Sam takes a deep breath "Especially after last night's dream."

Dean works Sam's cock. "Tell me your dream."

Sam is breathing faster. His hand is in Dean's hair. The other holding his shoulder as Dean works Sam's cock perfectly. Dean's wicked lips continue to kiss Sam's neck and Jawline.

Sam tries to tell Dean his dream through heavy breathing and gasping. He sometimes pauses, forgetting what he's trying to say as pleasure runs through him. He grips his brother tight. "I'm so close Dean."

Dean kisses Sam. Tongues exploring as he brings Sam over the edge. Sam gasps and holds onto Dean as he comes down from his high, trying to find his breath and his balance again.

They're rubbing each other's backs slowly in a comforting and loving way. Heads resting on shoulders. Just standing there in silence letting their body language speak for them. Their mom walked out on them, but they're okay because they have all they've ever needed. Each other.

Dean takes Sam's hand and they go to the showers. Dean bathes Sam and washes his long hair.

Sam washes Dean and then stands behind him. He presses his body against Dean's back. He takes Dean's erection into his large right hand and slowly starts working it. His left hand moves over Dean's wet chest and abs. Sam kisses Dean's neck and nips at it. He feels Dean's cock swell some in his hand. He kisses Dean's shoulder and moves back up to his neck.

Dean moans, "Sammy." His hips start moving, thrusting into Sam's hand. Pre-cum leaking. Dean's right hand covers Sam's on his chest.

Sam moves faster as he strokes Dean. Enjoying the sounds his brother makes. He licks and sucks at Dean's earlobe.

Dean reaches back with his left hand and grips Sam's ass. Sam moans, his cock swelling against Dean's crack. Dean presses his ass against Sam's cock as Sam continues masturbating his brother.

Sam kisses his way down Dean's spine and pushes him so he's leaning forward. Dean's hands are against the tile. Sam spreads him open and licks his puckered hole. Dean gasps. Sam nips Dean's butt cheek and Dean yelps. Then Sam buries his face between Dean's butt cheeks and eats Dean's hole the way Dean loves it.

Dean arches his back and opens himself completely. He moans and gasps. Sam has licked his ass many times, but right now he's being a bit more aggressive and Dean's surprised by just how good it feels.

Sam completely makes sure Dean is wrecked by what he's doing. He sucks on Dean's balls one at a time.

"Oh fuck!" Dean slaps the tiled wall.

Sam slides a spit slicked finger inside him while sucking his balls. He rubs against his prostate.

"Fuck me Sam! Please, just... Fuck!" Dean pushes back against Sam's hand.

Sam's surprised by Dean's request. "You sure?" Sam nips at his ass as he slides a second finger inside.

"YES! Fuck me!" Dean feels desperate now as he pushes back against Sam's hand and fucks himself on it. He hands Sam the small bottle of lube they keep hidden behind their men's body wash. He's trembling he want this so badly.

Sam lubes Dean up and inserts a third long finger stretching Dean completely. He stands up and lubes his hard cock, sets the lube on the ledge. "You realize I've never had sex like this until you."

Dean's confused. "Gay sex?"

Sam laughs. "No, frequent sex." Sam slides his hardness deep inside Dean with no warning. Pushing Dean against the tiled wall. Sam's breath is hot on Dean's ear. "I've never wanted anyone the way I want you." He thrusts his hips into Dean.

Dean's palms are flat against the cool tile. He arches his back and takes what Sam's giving him. "That's it Sammy. I want you. I want all of you."

Sam tilts Dean's face and kisses him. He then takes a step back and lets Dean feel every inch of his cock as he holds Dean's hips and gives Dean what he asked for.

Dean's cock is very hard and hanging low as Sam moves at a steady rhythm. Dean balls up his fists against the tile and cries out several times how good it feels. He begs Sam to go faster, but Sam keeps moving at an agonizingly steady pace. "Sam, you're killing me!"

Sam nips at his Shoulder. "Death by Sex. Better than... death by bacon. Right?"

"Not funny Sam." Dean's about to take over when Sam backs away.

Sam turns Dean around and slams him against the wall. He kisses him forcefully holding his wrists tighy with both hands. He looks his brother in the eyes. "You like it when your baby brother fucks you, huh? Fucks you hard in your tight ass."

Dean sees something in Sam's eyes he doesn't like. The hunter Sam that he's watched kill monsters. Dean doesn't really want this Sam in their bedroom. "Let me go Sam."

At hearing the tone in Dean's voice change, Sam lets Dean go. Dean instantly wraps himself around Sam. "I shouldn't have pushed you like this Sammy." Dean knows that Sam is reverting to something he's experienced in his past that he knows nothing about and probably doesn't want to. He feels awful.

Sam closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He sees images of Ruby taking his sexual aggression with a wicked grin. Next he sees Lucifer laughing and mocking him after Sam was forced to cum deep inside him. He has to get away from Dean. It's all too much.

Dean releases his embrace and Sam abruptly grabs a towel and leaves the shower.

"SAMMY WAIT!" Dean's feeling like an ass and thinks he should have known better. "Fuck."

Sam goes to his room and locks the door. He needs to sort out his thoughts and emotions. What was he thinking? Why would he try to go all dom on Dean like that? It's one thing when Dean wants to bottom, but Dean's always dominant even when he bottoms. Dean will always be alpha in their relationship. Why would Sam all of a sudden decide he wants to be alpha and dominate his brother? Sam runs his hands through his wet hair in frustration. Again images of dominating Ruby and even Lucifer letting Sam dominate him in gruesome ways fill his mind. Of course there was game playing in those relationships and in the end Sam lost. Just during sex, Sam felt powerful and in control. Fierce. Sam flops onto his bed. "Fierce." He sighs as he stares at the ceiling. "How could I ever even think of being fierce with Dean?" He's hating himself.

Dean suddenly has Sam's door open. Pick lock tools in hand. He sets them on Sam's dresser as he grabs a chair and sits beside sam's bed. Sam has rolled over and turned his back to Dean. He's still in his bath towel. Dean has his hand almost on Sam's shoulder and thinks better of it. He pulls his hand back. "Sammy, I love you. Please don't shut me out."

Sam can hear the agony in Dean's voice. "There's something still in me Dean. I'm sorry."

Dean gets into bed behind Sam and holds him in his arms. Sam holds Dean's hands tightly to his chest.

Sam's trying not to cry. "I don't know what came over me Dean."

"Shhh. I know Sammy. I understand." Dean presses his face against Sam's back. "You and I both still have monsters inside us. It doesn't make us bad. I need to feel blood on my hands, but never your blood. You understand?"

Sam turns to look at Dean and he sees tears in his eyes. Now Sam's eyes start to tear up. He asks his big brother, "How am I to get this kind of aggression out of me? You're able to go out and kill a vampire or another monster. What am I suppose to do in order to get this violence out of me?"

Dean wipes at Sam's tears. "What did you do in the past?"

Sam looks away. "Remember Piper? We met at that diner. She was a sub that wanted to be dominated. I took her to a secluded area and had my way with her before we passed out in the Impala."

"Oh." Dean's eyebrows go up in understanding. Sam cared for her afterward like most doms do. Dean didn't look at Piper close enough to see if she had any marks, bruises or scars.

"I could..."

"Don't even say it Dean. I could never let you. You're too alpha. Besides, I really do enjoy being your little brother and having you as sorta my dom." Sam rests his head against Dean's chest. "This is perfect."

Dean places his hand in Sam's hair. "It is." After a minute Dean says, "Whatever you need, I can give you. If you need to be physical, I can give you that. I just can't look into your eyes when you're like that. I saw someone I remember that I don't like."

"Yeah. Blood junky me."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. "No. You had the eyes of a predator. A hunter after his prey. I remember blood junky you. The look in your eyes was different. If I didn't know you, Sam, I would have feared for my life. Your eyes said you wanted blood, but not to consume. That's what caused my reaction. I had no idea what caused you to act the way you were." Dean kisses Sam. "In all honesty, you scared me."

"All I felt was shame. I realized I was feeling the desires I had with Ruby and Lucifer when they let me dominate them. I know it was all head games with them and they wanting me to feel powerful, but what can I say." Sam shrugs. "Their plans worked. I felt so alive when I topped them. Like I was a master over very powerful creatures. Something inside me still craves that more than anything. More than demon blood. I can't tell you why." Sam's shame creeps back up again. He hides his face against Dean's shoulder.

Dean just holds Sam. "It's okay Sammy. We'll figure this out." He lays on his back and holds Sam to his chest. They both fall asleep.

~~~~~

  
Dean's in a dark room. There's a spotlight on the back of his naked brother. He sees Sam walking toward a woman that's chained to a wall. Both hands tied above her head. Her legs parted. She's naked. Long brown hair flowing down her back.

Sam quickly comes up behind her and impales her. She moans and Dean can tell she's gagged. Sam fucks into her hard and fast, gripping her hair hard. Whether they are lubed, Dean has no idea.

Dean sees a chair and takes a seat as he watches.

Sam fucks her relentlessly for a while from behind. He soon turns her around and has her legs around his hips as he fucks up into her deep and aggressive. Her face is masked. Sam bites her breast and she arches her chest up toward him wanting more. His hands gripping her ass cheeks as he pounds her with his huge dick. She's crying through her gag. Sam doesn't stop. His deep booming voice shouts, "Shut up or I'll stop!" She quiets down immediately not wanting him to stop.

Dean is getting hard watching them.

Sam releases her cuffed hands from the chains holding her up. She falls to the ground still hand cuffed. "Get on your knees." She gets on her hands and knees. Sam gets behind her and lubes her ass. He fucks her ass with fast deep strokes. No other prep and no condom. He fucks her relentlessly. Sweat pours from him as he comes close to his climax.

He pulls out, turns her around, pulls off her mask then cums all over her face.

Dean looks from Sam's face as he climaxes to the woman's face as Sam shoots his cum all over her.

Dean's in shock! He jumps from his seat, "What the fuck!" He pulls his pistol and shoots 5 bullets at her.

She stands up and looks at Dean. Ruby pulls the gag from her mouth. "What the fuck Dean?!"

He's about to lunge at her with an angel blade when...

~¤~¤~¤~¤~

  
Sam wakes him up. "Dean. Wake up!"

He wakes up with a start looking for Ruby. "Where is she?"

"Who?" Sam looks around.

Dean looks around. "Never mind. Just a dream."

Sam wipes at the sweat on Dean's brow. "Go get dressed. I made us something to eat."

Dean notices that Sam's dressed. He gets out of bed and hugs Sam. "I love you."

Sam hugs him back and kisses him. "I love you."

Sam notices that Dean's body is sweaty, not just his brow. He asks out of concern more than curiosity, "Did you have a bad dream?"

Dean moves his hand over Sam's chest as he heads for the door. "I'll be okay."

Sam sighs.

Dean hasn't had bad dreams in a while. He wonders if the stress of their relationship might be the cause. He heads for the bathroom.

 


	10. Mom Knows

Dean meets Sam in the kitchen as he's pulling fries out of the fryer. Sam made homemade hamburgers. Dean sets about building his burger while Sam plates up the fries.

"Bring your plate to your room. We're going to watch a movie." Sam smiles.

"Sweet!" Dean follows Sam down the hall. Once in his bedroom he sees the beer cooler set up by the nightstand and a pie for dessert. There's also a bag of left over Halloween candy sitting by the pie. "You must really love me."

Sam hasn't stopped smiling. "You know I do."

Dean sets his plate down and takes Sam's. He sets it down and then kisses Sam proper. Sam kisses him back. Things could easily escalate, but their food is getting cold. Sam gets into bed first and Dean hands him his plate. Dean gets in and holds his plate. They find a movie on Netflix and eat their meal while watching it and drinking beer.

Once the movie ends, Dean turns the TV off and straddles Sam. He moves his fingers over Sam's face and thumb over his lips. "I want you."

"Anything you want. I'm yours." Sam holds Dean's palm to his lips and kisses his open palm.

Dean looks into Sam's colorful eyes and sees desire and love. He slowly undresses Sam, touching him and kissing him as each piece of clothing is removed.

"Dean, you make love to me so perfectly." Sam kisses Dean and the two of them almost melt together.

Dean slowly undresses and Sam watches with hooded eyelids. Once Dean is completely naked, he hovers above Sam.

Sam takes in every part of Dean. His hands move over Dean's shoulders and back. He spreads his legs and wraps them around Dean's hips, pulling Dean on top of him. They kiss with a deep hunger. Dean kisses his way down Sam's chest. He sucks on Sam's cock a short while and then pulls lube from under his pillow. He lubes himself and Sam's hole.

No need to stretch. Sam wants this. In fact he needs it. He wants Dean now. He wants to feel the ache and pleasure. "Go ahead. I want you to."

Dean kisses Sam. Sam's legs are around Dean's hips. Dean slowly pushes inside Sam and sam pulls Dean closer to him. "I'm yours." He's breathless.

Dean kisses Sam's neck up to and behind his ear. Burying his face in Sam's hair, he braces himself with his left arm while holding Sam's face in his right hand. "You're so perfect for me." He lifts his head and looks into Sam's eyes. Sam is filled with emotions. Dean moves his hips and both of them moan at how good it feels. Dean's eyes brighten and he swallows hard. "I love you Sammy." He kisses his brother as he grips his hair and continues making love to him.

Sam holds Dean for a moment while kissing him. He then starts moving his hands over Dean's body as he moves. With each thrust Sam feels the muscles in Dean's back, shoulders, flanks and glutes as they flex. He loves Dean's body just as much as he does his mind.

Dean pauses and gasps. "Where are you?" He kisses Sam.

Sam smiles showing dimples. "I'm thinking about how much I love your mind as much as I do your amazing body that's making love to me right now. You amaze me in so many ways."

Dean shuts Sam up with a deep kiss. His tongue invading Sam's mouth as he begins moving his hips more aggressively.

Sam holds Dean tightly in his arms. Their kiss breaks with a gasp as Sam holds Dean so close. Dean's lower body keep moving. Sam's voice is quiet, breathy and trembling. "Mnughh Dean. So perfect. I'm cumming." His body tenses then trembles as he falls over the edge.

Dean whispers in Sam's ear. "That's it. I love it when you fall apart beneath me. Just keep holding me and don't let go."

Sam grips Dean tighter. His voice is deep and shaky, "Never letting go, De."

Dean finds his release in Sam's arms. He too ends up a shaky mess. He kisses Sam with trembling fingers touching his face. They kiss like this for a while. Neither of them want to move.

Sam bearing Dean's weight doesn't bother him. Nor does his semi-hard cock still being in his ass. Sam's forever looking into Dean's green eyes. Dean asks, "How long have you been watching?"

Cas moves so he's standing within their line of vision. "Long enough."

Sam's about to freak out when Dean calms him with a kiss. "It's okay. Just relax."

"What do you mean "Long enough"?" Dean is adamant. He's daring Cas to say something about him and Sam making love. In fact, he and Sam have yet to move from their position. Dean is still somewhat hard inside Sam and Sam is still holding onto Dean tightly. It's as if Sam's afraid Cas might zap Dean off someplace. Dean hates that Sam feels this way. He knows Sam like he knows himself. He strokes Sam's hair. Sam loosens his grip on Dean.

"You left your door ajar and your mother stood in the doorway for a good majority of your lovemaking." Cas says this like it's just something that happens everyday. Like it's no big deal.

Dean looks into Sam's eyes and sees his tears forming. "Can we have some privacy Cas?"

"Yes. Call me when you're ready." He vanishes.

"Dean, she's never going to speak to us again!" Sam's very upset.

"Shhhh. I know." He wipes at Sam's tears and kisses his cheeks. "If she can't accept us..." Dean has a stray tear. "You've got me Sammy. We have each other. It's how it's always been. I know you were looking forward to getting to know mom, but she should still be in heaven with dad. She's been having trouble with us as we are. Now that she's seen us like this, I..." He sighs. "I don't think she'll be back."

Sam kisses Dean's stray tear from his cheek. "We'll be okay." At some point Dean became free of Sam tight embrace and is now just resting his body on top of Sam.

Sam welcomes Dean's weight on top of him like this. In fact, it feels good to hold and be held by the one person who truly loves him.

Dean rests his head against Sam's. "I love you."

"I love you more." Sam strokes the back of Dean's head. His fingers going through his short blonde hair. "No matter what, I'll be here Dean. I promise."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. "Don't make promises you can't keep." He kisses Sam and it's a very heartfelt kiss. He then gets up and grabs his robe, putting it on before heading for the shower.

Sam gets under the covers, curls up and literally cries himself to sleep.

Dean returns to his room to dress and finds Cas sitting on his bed next to Sam who's quietly snoring. "Hello Dean."

Dean holds his finger over his own lips to silence Cas. "Shhhh." Dean quickly dresses then has Cas follow him into the kitchen. He starts a fresh pot of coffee.

He turns and looks at Cas. "What was her reaction?"

Cas sighs. "She watched in silence at first. She then shook her head and walked away in tears."

"Where did she go?" Dean is upset. He feels violated. She had to have heard them having sex, why would she walk into the room while he was having sex with ANYONE. He throws the empty coffee mug he was holding across the room and it shatters against the refrigerator door.

Dean's leaning against a table on his left, but still facing toward the fridge with his head down. "I really wanted Sammy to have time with her. You know? He never had a mom."

Cas stands in front of him and places his hand on Dean's shoulder. "Sam had you growing up."

Dean shrugs away Cas' hand and walks around him to get another mug and pour himself some coffee. "It's not the same. You wouldn't understand."

"You're right."

Dean looks at Cas.

"I wouldn't understand because my Father created me and dumped me on my brothers and sisters. Anna practically taught me from a young age about the way things are. We always had our archangel brothers that we could go to if we had serious problems. I would usually go to Gabriel." Cas has tears on his cheeks. Something Dean doesn't remember ever really seeing on Cas. Memories Cas has buried or just forgotten are becoming painful for him. "Go to him Dean and don't let go. Your memories as a boy with your mother you'll always have. You may not always have Sam. He may not always have you. What's more important?" He vanishes.

Dean's in tears. He sits at the table and buries his face in his arms. "I'm sorry Cas." Soon he feels arms around his shoulders and looks through blurry eyes to see Sam sitting beside him.

"I heard the smash. I guess it was your coffee cup?"

Dean quickly has Sam in a crushing hug. "I'm here for you Sam. Anything you need, I'm here. And I'm sorry about mom."

"You know it's not your fault I grew up without a mom..."

Dean leans back. "I know. I just though..."

Sam interrupts, "Let me finish." He looks into Dean's green eyes. "You were better than any mom ever. When I was in grade school, kids would talk about how their mom wouldn't let them do things. I was always talking about how my big brother always did cool stuff with me. They'd show up at lunch with a tuna sandwich and raw veggies. I had a peanut butter and chocolate syrup sandwich, those cheese n' crackers with the red stick and a can of Big Red. I'd go back to class on a sugar rush, but I never let on." Both of them laugh. Sam continues, "You let me keep my hair long. Other guys wanted to, but their mom's would refuse and tell them boys don't have long hair. You took me to car races, rated R movies, shooting fireworks, bowling to check out chics bending over." Sam laughs. "Moms don't do that. You know? All through school I was hearing about how mom's were overprotective and then kids went out and did what their moms told them not to do anyway. I had you and had no urge to really rebel against you." He sighs. "It was dad I rebelled against because he wanted me to become you. I wanted to write and get into learning. He wanted me to get my hands bloody. Well, damned if I didn't do both. Not because of him and not because I was forced to. You taught me everything I know." Sam looks down at his hands almost nervous. "I hope I... as the Sammy you raised... I hope I made you proud like a father or a mom would be."

Dean tilts Sam's face up. "I'm more proud now than ever. Not just because of raising you." Dean uses his right hand to moves Sam's hair behind his ear as he did when Sam was a little boy. His emotions feeling raw. "Mostly because you're smart enough to realize you never really needed a mom. You just wished she was around."

"Exactly." Sam nods.

"Me too." Dean's upset because he had a mom once that moved his hair behind his ear as she talked to him when he was 4.

Sam knows why Dean's upset now. He curses Mary in his heart for it. He holds Dean, comforting him as best as he can. "Dean, giving you my heart and all that I am was the best decision I ever made."

~~~~~

  
Several weeks have passed. No word from their mother and they've come to terms with it.

They've put all their effort into locating Lucifer who has fallen off the grid.

They tried summoning Crowley and got nothing. They captured a demon that told them, after some of Dean's special persuasion, that Crowley is either dead or in deep hiding. Sam exorcised the demon and took the surviving human to the E.R.

A week passes and a box appears on the war room table after they returned from a grocery run. The brothers go on high alert and search the bunker coming up empty.

There's a note beside the box:

 

*****

"Hello Sam,

I'm sorry things went so bad last time we met. Let's not let that happen again. We have a key to your bunker. We planted a bomb that's set to detonate in 24 hours from the time you and Dean left on your errand, unless you both come to our headquarters straight away. The coordinates are on the back of this letter.

I look forward to seeing you again. I'll have a bottle of wine waiting for you.

Best regards,

Toni

P.S. We have your mother. You should hurry."

*****

 

While Sam's reading the note out loud, Dean opens the box and immediately puts the lid back on. "That cunt is dead! Come on Sam!" He pulls on Sam's arm.

Sam's never heard Dean use that language. He gets loose from Dean and looks in the box. Inside is a severed finger with Mary's wedding ring on it. Sam drops the box. "Oh my God!"

"Sammy, this doesn't mean she's dead. Those sons of bitches have her. No matter how she feels about us, we have to save her."

"You're right." Sam pulls his cell phone and calls all the nearby hunters he knows. Dean does the same. When they hear that Mary's been captured and what the BMOL did, they are eager to help.

Dean thought about calling on Cas, but he knows the Brits have their headquarters marked with angel warding preventing Cas from entering. He'd be of no help on this mission.

The hunters meet at Phillip Wilson's house. He's one of the hunters that are willing to help.

Dean lets Sam organize everything because he knows Sam's good at it. Sam's also determined to kill Toni himself.

With less than 3 hours before the bunker explodes, (according to Toni) they arrive outside the BMOL headquarters with 8 other fellow hunters.

The plan is for Sam and Dean to get inside, steal keys and open the doors so the other 8 can get inside. First, they want to make sure the bomb in the bunker is defused and Mary is released or located so she can be freed.

~~~~~

Sam and Dean are escorted inside at gunpoint. Guards search them and removed all their weapons.

"Good to see you again Sam. You made it just in time." Toni sets down the glass of wine she was drinking and turns to a computer monitor. She types away and images of the inside of Sam and Dean's bunker appear. She touches the screen and zooms in on a shelf in the dungeon where files are kept. Tucked between boxes and hanging files are packs of C4 explosives and some kind of detonator with a flashing light. She types something and the light stops flashing. "There we are. Bomb defused as promised."

Dean has hate and rage in his eyes. Toni can see it. Sam is calm and his anger is under control. It's just under the surface.

Toni remembers how Sam was before. She wants nothing more than to break him. "I have some people I need you both to spend some time with." Toni taps her nails on her hips.

Dean practically snarls, "Where's our mother?"

Toni grins. "Oh yes. Mary is quit well."

A door opens and Mary enters. She's dressed in a military type uniform. All black with laced up army boots and a black cap. Her hair is tied up in a bun under her cap. She stands at attention with her hands at her side. She's looking toward the ground. "Madam, you wish to see me?"

"Your sons are here to see you." Toni points toward Sam and Dean.

Mary looks at the men standing in front of her. She shakes her head and looks confused. "Madam, I don't know these men. You must be mistaken. I don't have any children."

Sam and Dean are in shock. Dean pleads, "Mom, you have to remember that you married John Winchester and had 2 boys named Dean and Samuel? You named us after your parents. Don't you remember?" He takes a step toward her and she takes a step back.

She looks at him. "I assure you, I've never been married and I've never had children. Besides, you're too old to be my sons. We're practically the same age!" She looks toward Toni. She's very distraught by this man and his strange accusations. She's wringing her hands. "May I be excused now?"

Dean's about to grab Toni and knock her into next week, but Sam grabs Dean before he can get to Toni. He tells Dean, "Don't! You'll only make things worse!" Sam then whispers in Dean's ear, "Patience. Just stay calm. Look at mom's finger."

Dean looks at Mary's hands. She has all her fingers, just no ring. Toni's a tricky bitch. She probably has Mary under a spell of some kind.

Toni nods, "Yes Mary. You may leave us."

Mary gives a small nod toward Toni and leaves the room.

Toni smirks. "Gentlemen, follow me." She opens the door using a key card and leads the men down a hallway. Six men walk up behind Sam and Dean. There's a struggle, but Sam and Dean are subdued.

Toni opens a door with a key and the guards push Sam inside. Toni shuts the door, locking it. There's a small window in the door. "Take a look Dean. I know you'll want to see this."

Sam is in a completely dark room. "Hello?" He feels around in the dark for the wall. He is searching for a light switch. He hears a noise. Someone clears his throat. Sam yells, "Who's there?!"

Red eyes glow in the darkness. "It's just me Sammy. Did you miss me?"

Sam backs up against the door. His breathing becomes labored as he tries the doorknob in vain. "I can't say I have."


	11. BMOL HQTRS

Toni explains to Dean, "I've introduced a hallucinogen into the room with Sam."

Dean's banging on the door. "SAMMY!! WHATEVER YOU SEE OR HEAR, IT'S NOT REAL!!"

"STOP THAT! He can't hear you!!" Toni sighs.

Dean looks at Toni with deep anger in his voice. "Why are you doing this?"

She waves her hand matter-of-factly, "Sam has things in his head I'm interested in. I want to see if he'll give up some secrets."

Dean lunges toward her, but the guards hold him back. "YOU STUPID BITCH! Sam's been through enough!"

She scolds Dean for his rudeness. "Sam still has a unique relationship with you, Castiel, Crowley, LUCIFER. I need to know what he might be willing to share while under the influence. Now be quiet so I can take notes." She watches on closed circuit cameras using her portable laptop.

Dean watches through the window again.

•●•●•●•●•

The room is still dark.

Sam feels a touch to his forehead and suddenly the room looks like a kitchen. "What the hell?"

Sam looks around and the room is bright and cheerful. Stainless steel appliances, cherry wood cabinetry. Gray granite countertops. The kitchen belongs in a very wealthy home. It has all the amenities. Lucifer is there dressed in jeans with a white, long-sleeved, button down shirt.

Sam looks and sees that he's wearing a new outfit as well. He's wearing new stonewashed jeans that fit him perfectly, shiny black boots and a pale blue button down shirt.

"Ah, their done!" Lucifer grabs oven mitts and pulls out a sheet of cookies from the oven.

"You made cookies?" Sam wrinkles his brow in confusion.

Lucifer plates 3 cookies and gives the plate to Sam. "Come over to my side Sam. I've got all things that are good."

Sam looks at the plate of chocolate chip cookies. "What is this? None of this is real. What are you up to?"

Lucifer snaps his fingers and the room goes dark again. Lucifer grabs hold of Sam and places his hand over Sam's head. Sam goes unconscious in Lucifer's arms. He reads Sam's thoughts and memories then laughs. "Oh, you're a naughty one!" He then recreates Dean's bedroom from Sam's memory with 100% accuracy. He then alters Sam's mind so when he sees and hears Lucifer he will believe he's seeing and hearing Dean. He lays Sam on "Dean's" bed and snaps his fingers. Instantly they are both dressed differently. Sam is dressed as he came and Lucifer is dressed like Dean.

Lucifer leans over Sam and kisses him. "Wake up Sammy."

Sam moans as he wakes up. "What time is it?"

"Not quite dinner time." Lucifer pulls Sam into a warm embrace. Sam kisses him. They both start getting into it.

•●•●•●•●•

Dean is still standing outside Sam's BMOL prison door next to Toni Bevell. There's enough light in Sam's prison he can see him on the floor moaning and doesn't like it. He starts banging on the door again. His anger is red hot. Sam must know that what he's seeing isn't real!

Dean feels a sharp sting on the back of his neck. He turns toward Toni and suddenly feels woozy. He falls to the floor unconscious.

•●•●•●•●•

Lucifer rubs against Sam and one thing leads to another. Lucifer knows exactly how to do everything Dean does perfectly because he recieved that info straight from Sam's memories. He knows how to kiss, touch, undress, lick, suck and fuck just as Dean would.

Lucifer fucks Sam hard and deep. Sam climaxes right as Lucifer does. Lucifer kisses Sam's neck while Sam holds him.

Sam sighs, "I love you so much Dean."

Lucifer raises his head showing Sam his true identity and Sam freaks out. "NO!"

The room changes to look like the inside of Lucifer's cage in hell.

Sam yells repeatedly, "NO! NO! NO! NO!"

He punches at Lucifer who gets off Sam. Sam feels Lucifer's cock leave his body. He's suddenly nauseous and turns to the side of the bench he's now laying on and throws up.

Lucifer laughs. "Awe come on Sammy. I wasn't that bad."

After a couple minutes Sam quickly gets dressed and curls up in one of the corners of the cage. He holds his knees and rocks back and forth.   
  
Lucifer shakes his head. "Just an old rerun. I thought you'd be a little bit bolder by now. You know?" He yawns. "Same ol' Sam. I'm actually kind of bored with you."

Lucifer walks around. "What will I do with you?" He taps his chin.

•●•●•●•●•

Meanwhile, Dean has been taken to another room. He wakes up clamped into a steel chair.

"Hello Dean."

"I know that voice." Dean cringes.

"You should. We use to be BFFs. Right now, you're just my bitch."

"Bite me Crowley!" Dean's pissed off and wants out of this mad house.

Crowley injects Dean with something.

"What was that?!" Dean struggles against his restraints.

"You'll learn soon enough darling. Just sit still like a good little Squirrel and be patient." Crowley picks up a note pad off his desk and writes something then picks up a glass tumbler and takes a sip of his whiskey.

Dean soon recognizes familiar sensations and symptoms. He's starting to have a severe sensitivity to light and sound. He's also very thirsty, but not for water. "You son of a bitch! You injected me with vampire blood?!" Dean feels fangs forming as he moves his tongue over his upper gums.

"Calm down!" Crowley injects Dean again with something else. "That should be the remedy."

Dean is suddenly unable to hear due to a loud ringing in his ears. "WHAT?! WHAT'S HAPPENING?!"

Crowley grabs a bucket and holds it as Dean throws up into it.

It's not as bad as drinking the tea remedy, but at least it worked and Dean's not a vampire.

Crowley gives Dean time to recover. Gives him some water to drink. "Are you ready for round two?"

Dean's eyes get big. "ROUND TWO?!" He coughs and drinks more water given to him by his captor.

Dean looks around, "Why are you working for Mary Poppins' evil step-sister?"

Crowley cracks a grin. "She has me stuck here in a trap." Crowley shows Dean a bracelet with a devil's trap symbols on it. "Only way she'll release me is if I do these experiments and give her cures for vampirism and lycanthropy. She also wants the formula to close the gates to hell. I told her I don't know the formula. She doesn't believe me." He rolls his eyes.

Dean adds, "Only Kevin knew it and he wasn't sharing. He took it to his grave."

Crowley nods. "Exactly!"

(Dean and Crowley both know the formula, but they won't let anyone else know that. The demon tablet has been destroyed, but it is rumored that these tablets have a way of mending themselves and relocating to hidden locations. After all, they are the Word of God.)

Crowley injects Dean again with yet another unknown concoction.

Dean looks at Crowley, "Werewolf?"

He nods. "Stay calm. I got the cure."

"You sure about that?" Dean wonders when the turn will happen. "How soon will the turn happen?"

Crowley hits Dean with a hand held taser. "Right about now."

The jolt of pain from the taser angers Dean enough to cause the change to start happening. Dean's eyes change first, then his vision changes. His hands have claws growing from his finger tips and his mouth fills with fangs. This is very painful at first.

The chair Dean's in is made of steel and his arms and legs are clamped down with steel clamps with pad locks. He can't get out. In fact, the clamps are crushing his limbs because his limbs have grown in size some during his metamorphosis.

Crowley quickly injects Dean with the "cure". However, it doesn't work. Crowley injects him with serum #2. It also doesn't work. "Bullocks!" He finally injects Dean with a sedative which causes him to pass out. He slowly returns to his normal self as he rests.

Crowley looks at Dean then at his notes. He downs his glass of whiskey. "What a mess." He rests his head on his desk of notes.

Toni's voice is heard over the intercom, "Was that the remedy?"

Crowley wants to lie, but he knows she'll test it on someone else. "No. I had to sedate him. The 2 remedies I made for lycanthropy failed. I'm back to square one. I did find a remedy for vampirism however."

"Good. Keep trying on the lycan remedy. I'll check back in a few hours."

Crowley rolls his eyes as he sits at his desk and continues working on this remedy.

He wishes he had his mother around. "Wow!" He can't believe he thought about that bitch...witch. He pours himself some more whiskey and opens up his books on magic, potions and incantations.

•●•●•●•●•

"What did she promise you?" Sam refuses to look up. He's still got his arms wrapped around his knees as he sits in the corner of a room that looks like the cage. "Did she promise to give you Chuck? What did Toni promise you to get you to agree to this?"

Lucifer snaps and Sam's chained to a cold steel table and memories of what he endured in the cage runs through his mind. His body involuntarily trembles, but he refuses to back down from his line of reasoning. "Whatever she promised you, she lied. She's a manipulator. Chuck's not here. She can't get to him any more than you or I can. Think about it. You're his son and you can't find him. How can she?"

Lucifer loosens Sam's wrist then places a large hook in the palm of his hand. Sam cries out in pain. Lucifer straps his hand back down to the table letting the hook hold his hand in place. He then does the same to the other hand. Sam has tears pouring down his face. He yells, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!!!"

Lucifer's eyes turn red. "The Book of The Damned!"

"Rowena had it last." Sam's panting in pain.

"I killed her!" He's livid. He gets into Sam's face. "Did she tell you where she put it?"

Sam's in a lot of pain. "WHY WOULD SHE?! SHE STOLE IT FROM ME!! AUGHH!!" Sam's dreading what he'll do next.

Lucifer's about to stab Sam when Sam hears an ancient incantation being said.

Suddenly, Sam's no longer on the steel table. He's on the floor in a dimly lit room. He's clothed in what he was wearing when he arrived. There's not a mark on his body.

Toni enters the room with a clip board. "Thank you Sam. We'll eventually find The Book of The Damned. It's a shame Lucifer killed Rowena. We do know her last whereabouts however. I'm sure we'll locate it soon enough."

Alarms start going off all over. There's been a breech.

Toni looks away from Sam for a moment.

Just long enough for him to knock her to the ground and get hold of her throat. "Don't move. I will kill you."

With his hand wrapped firmly around her tiny neck, he removes her lab coat. He empties her pants pockets. He pats her whole body down for any weapons. He finds her taser and pockets it.

He then puts her onto the small bed up against the wall. He uses the bed restraints to secure her to the bed.

She's scared. "You're being watched by cameras."

Sam sticks to his task. "Everyone is busy with more important problems right now."

He empties her lab coat and tosses it over the camera in the room. He places the keys, key card, and syringe (full of what he assumes to be a sedative) in his pockets with the taser. He rips the bedding and makes a gag that he puts on Toni to keep her quiet. The room is mostly sound proof, but if they listen in, all they'll hear is her moaning.

He takes her clipboard and ink pen with him as he leaves the room in search of his brother and mother. Looking at the paperwork on the clipboard, Sam learns that Dean is in room 24. He just left room 16. He follows the hallway until he finds the right room.

Sam hears fighting happening at a distance in a separate part of the building. He's assuming his hunter friends got tired of waiting and decided to attack on their own. Good.

Sam looks into room 24 and sees Crowley sitting at a desk. Dean is clamped down into a steel chair. Sam uses the set of keys and finds number 24. He uses it to open the door.

Crowley turns to see Sam. "Oh Moose! I'm so glad it's you! That bitch was forcing me to find a cure for lycanthropy."

Sam was in the process of freeing Dean when he heard Crowley. "What?"

Crowley stops Sam. "Don't loosen him just yet. He's a werewolf."

Sam punches Crowley in the jaw, firm and with all his strength. Crowley falls to the ground holding his jaw in pain. Sam holds his hand in pain.

Dean awakens to see Sam slug Crowley. "Good one Sam!"

"Dean!" Sam goes to his brother. "You okay?"  
  
"That son of a bitch turned me into a werewolf."

Crowley shrugs. "It's true. My mother's a bitch."

They hear the fighting getting closer.

Sam looks at Crowley. "We gotta go."

Crowley grabs all his notes and books. He holds his wrist out to Sam. "Do you have the key to this?"

Sam looks through the keyring in his pocket. One key has a matching devil's trap symbol. "You take him with you. You find a cure!"

Crowley nods. "I will. I'm taking him someplace he can't hurt anyone or escape if he turns. I'll call with the address."

Sam frees Dean and they embrace each other. Sam kisses Dean's neck. "I'll get to you as soon as I can."

"You kill that bitch for us. Sam, burn this place to the ground." Dean pats Sam's cheek.

"I plan on it." Sam's determined.

Dean gives Sam a peck on the cheek. Sam removes the devil's trap bracelet from Crowley. Crowley places a hand on Dean's shoulder and they disappear.

Sam hopes he won't regret sending Dean off with Crowley.

He looks for the weapons room on the clipboard. He finds it and heads there. He gathers his and Dean's weapons. He grabs a duffle bag and grabs a few other weapons of interest. He then returns to room 16.

He enters the room to find Toni still tied up. Sam walks up to her and points his pistol at her head. "I hope you had fun. This is for making me relive my personal hell and turning my brother into a werewolf. Who knows what evil you've done to my mother and countless others. Hell is a real place Toni. Tell whoever you meet in Hell, Sam Winchester sent you." Sam puts a bullet between her eyes and walks away without a second thought.

He quickly heads toward the fighting and uses the map on the clipboard to locate the control room. He hopes to find his mother along the way.

Sam comes across several dead guards dressed like Mary.

He sees one of his friends wounded. He's trying to limp toward the exit. Sam helps him out and quickly runs back in.

He spots his mother. She's bent over doing something. Sam pulls the syringe from his pocket and approaches her.

Mary turns on Sam and there's a struggle.

Someone jumps Sam, but he's able to throw them off.

Mary, however, is able to get away. The guy Sam tossed gets up and Sam knocks him out with one punch. He then goes looking for the control room.

Sam's outside the control room when he hears a pistol being chambered behind him. "Drop your gun." It's Mary.

Sam bends down to drop his gun. He comes up and knocks Mary's hand, but she was expecting it. She shoots at Sam grazing his arm.

He's able to finally grab hold of her and subdue her using a pressure point in her shoulder. She crumples to the ground helpless. Sam injects her with the sedative and she passes out.

Sam drags Mary up against a wall and leaves her there. He'll come back for her in a moment, first he needs to take care of a few things.

Sam enters the control room and he finds 2 of his buddies are already inside. They're holding everyone at gunpoint.

Sam is done trying to negotiate.

He sees a woman in a suit on a large computer monitor. She introduces herself as Dr. Hess, the leader of the British Men of Letters in London. She starts talking about whatever.

Sam interrupts her. "Listen, I don't care about anything you have to say. This building will no longer exist in about 15 or 20 minutes. The evil people you sent here to take over our way of life are no more. They are dead. Anyone else you send here will also die. You have been warned. You stay over there and we will stay here. Basically, mind your own damn business and stay out of ours." Sam shoots up the computers and electrical equipment.

One of the BMOL pulls a gun and shoots at the hunter holding a gun at him.

Sam and the other hunter shoot all the BMOL in the room dead. 5 BMOL died.

One hunter got shot in the gut. His buddy puts something over the wound and helps him out of the building.

Sam opens the duffle bag his hunter friends brought in and starts setting C4 explosives throughout the headquarters on a 10 minute timer.

He picks up his mother and the bag of weapons, then heads for the Impala.

He and the 5 surviving hunters have just started driving away when the building explodes.

Sam gets a text from Crowley with the address where he and Dean are. He's hoping that maybe Crowley can also help unscramble Mary's brain. He drives straight for the address on his phone.


	12. Crowley's Hospitality

Sam arrives at the address given to him by Crowley.

Just as he stops the car, Mary starts showing signs that she's waking up. Sam reaches into the glove box and pulls out handcuffs. He cuffs his mother's hands behind her back for his safety and hers.

He calls Crowley. "I'm here.

Crowley appears outside the building.

Sam gets Mary out of the Impala and meets Crowley where he's standing.

Crowley asks, "Who's this?"

Sam introduces them. "Crowley meet my mother, Mary Winchester. Mary meet the king of hell, Crowley."

Mary scowls at Sam. "I'm not your mother."

Crowley laughs.

She scowls at Crowley.

He looks at Sam. "She might be related to my mother."

Sam swallows hard at that thought. "No way in hell we're related, Crowley."

He nods, "True. I'm allergic to flannel."

"I'm allergic to bullshit. Can we go inside now?" Sam's getting impatient.

Crowley places a hand on their shoulders and all three are suddenly in an extremely large room.

In the center of the room is a large cage. Dean's in the cage. The cage is like an upscale hotel room. It's very accommodating with a memory foam mattress bed, nice bedding, sink & toilet (in a separate closet), stove, stocked fridge and TV with Netfix. Dean's also got his cell phone with his charger plugged in. All the comforts of home.

Crowley has a desk with a computer and tons of books outside of the cage. He's got a lab with testing equipment set up. There are also demons working on Crowley's experiments to try and find Dean's cure.

Sam asks, "What happens if he "wolfs" out?"

Crowley looks up from a paper that was handed to him by a demon. He thinks about Sam's question. "There are demons in this room equipped with tranquilizer guns. They are instructed to only shoot werewolves, whether they are in cages or not. About 60 years ago I learned the hard way exactly how much tranquilizer it takes to knock out a werewolf. It takes a lot. So, stay out of the path of those darts if they have to shoot into Dean's cage."

Sam feels bad for his brother. "Just hurry up and fix him so we can get out of here."

"What about mommy dearest?" Crowley grins.

Sam looks at Mary who has a vacant stare. "She can wait. Do you have a cell we can keep her in?"

He nods and snaps. Mary vanishes.

Sam looks around, "Where did she go!"

"I put her in a private cell were she won't be messed with. She has the same amenities as Dean, she's not in shackles, there are demon guards that will alert me if she escapes and there is no escape where she is." He smirks.

"You put my mother in hell!" Sam is pissed.

"It's just till we find a cure for your brother. I can't think of any place else to secure her so she can't escape! She's a WINCHESTER!" Crowley yells.

Sam concedes. "Point taken."

Sam goes up to the cage and Dean meets him. "We're going to cure you. I promise."

"I know Sammy. I have no doubt." Dean kisses the palm of Sam's hand and holds it to his cheek. He doesn't care who sees. He closes his eyes. "Just you being here has calmed me so much. I've felt like I could turn at any minute until I saw you. Once I saw you were here, I felt my whole body relax."

Sam smiles. "That's good. Stay calm and you won't turn."

"Where did mom vanish to?"

Sam sighs. "Crowley put her in a cell like yours to keep her safe until we find a cure for you. Once we cure you, we'll figure out why she can't remember her husband and children."

"Maybe she doesn't want to." Dean lowers Sam's hand from his face and just holds it in his. "After witnessing what she did before she left us, maybe she wants to forget she ever had a family." Dean looks upset.

"No Dean. I refuse to believe that. This is something that bitch Toni did to her brain. If it was just her forgetting she had kids, maybe, but she forgot her husband too. Why would she forget the love of her life? I'd NEVER forget you." Sam palms Dean's face again and looks into his eyes. "I love you. We'll fix you and mom. Okay?"

He nods. "Okay. You should get your arm looked at."

Sam looks at where Dean's looking. He sees the blood and tear in his shirt on his upper right arm. "It's just a small flesh wound. Mom grazed me with a bullet."

Dean's eyes get big. "Really?"

Crowley walks up. "You two finished? I'd like to get to it so we can move on to other things."

Sam follows Crowley toward his work station.

After Sam bandages his flesh wound, he starts helping Crowley with whatever he needs. They work together to find the cure for lycanthropy by taking Crowley's failed cures and seeing where they went wrong.

Crowley has 4 lab chemists he kidnapped and brought to the lab to work on this cure as well. They take vials of blood from Dean and work with it under a microscope for hours using chemicals, biological elements and magic to try and come up with this cure.

Demons don't need sleep. Sam and the scientists do. They take shifts sleeping on twin beds located against a far wall. Sam would sleep for only 3 hours, then get up and back to studying again.

It took 72 hours of around the clock work, but they believe they have it. This cure is made of some very rare ingredients. Crowley had to go to the other end of the globe and steal some of them.

To test it, they need a werewolf. Crowley sent his demons on a hunting trip. They have 2 werewolves in chains and metal cages in hell.

Crowley snaps and one werewolf appears in a small cage in their lab. He is a 30-something year old male. A demon reaches into the cage and shocks him with a taser. He immediately turns into his wolf form.

Dean was watching and his own eyes turned at the sight and sound of the human becoming a werewolf. He had to go put his earbuds on and listen to his music real loud. He lays on the bed staring at the top of the cage ignoring what's going on in hopes he won't change.

The werewolf is shot three times with a dart gun full of the cure that they hope works. (He had to be shot 3 times to give him the proper dosage.) Withing 30 seconds the werewolf becomes human again. It appears to have worked.

After 10 minutes, a demon lab tech opens the cage door, removes the darts from his skin, draws blood and takes his vitals. The "werewolf" is told he's been injected with an experimental cure. He's asked to let the "nurse" know if he feels anything other than normal.

Sam gathers Crowley and their lead werewolf scientist together. Sam crosses his arms and explains, "Back in 2006, I witnessed a non-pureblood werewolf fail to change during the night of a full moon. It was unexplainable. She should have changed. The next night she did change. I tell you this to say that he could be showing a false cure. I'm hoping this is the real thing. Believe me."

They all look at their test subject at the same time. He seems normal.

Crowley walks over, reaches into the cage and zaps him with the taser. The man jolts, but doesn't "wolf out". No wolf eyes, claws or teeth.

Sam walks up to the cage and asks, "What's your name?"

The poor guy is shaking all over. "Mike."

Sam grabs a blanket, opens the cage and covers his naked body. "Mike, you seem to be cured. However, for your safety and ours we're going to keep you locked up for 24 hours."

He nods. "I'm hungry. I haven't eaten in a long time."

Sam gives Crowley an dirty look. "What do you want. You name it."

He smiles. "Anything but bloody, raw animal meat." He laughs. "It suddenly seems gross and I've been eating it for decades."

He gets a cheeseburger, large fries and a soda from his favorite fast food place. Crowley snaps and it appears on a small table in his cage.

Sam makes sure Crowley feeds Mary and Dean too.

"What would you like Samantha?" Crowley's fingers are ready to snap.

Sam rolls his eyes at Crowley. He then looks at the 4 other human scientists. "Just give us a small buffet of do-it-yourself sub sandwiches including a variety of cheeses, meats, vegetables and condiments. Also include chips, soft drinks and water. This way we all have something to eat." Sam motions toward the ones still looking at slides under microscopes and sitting at computers.

Crowley snaps and a buffet of food appears just as Sam described. Crowley even included pie. Sam grinned at that.

Sam finishes eating and takes a piece of apple pie to Dean.

Dean greets Sam with a smile that Sam knows Dean's only wearing as a mask. Dean kisses Sam's palm again.

"The cure seems to work. One more test and a 24 hour waiting period, then we should be good to go." Sam caresses Dean's jaw. "I love you."

"I'm okay Sammy. Thanks for the fast food and pie. The fridge in here has food, but it's more to your liking."

Sam laughs. "Rabbit food."

"Yep." Dean sighs. "I do have chips, beer and Netflix though. Could be worse. Awesome thing is the beer magically replenishes itself. I drink a sixer and it magically shows back up in the fridge! We need a fridge like this in the bunker."

Sam nods. "Talk to your Ex-BFF over there. Maybe he'll hook you up."

After Mike finished his meal, Crowley snapped his fingers and Mike was replaced by a different man in his chains and cage.

A demon uses a taser on the new test subject and he yells out in pain. The yell becomes a roar as he becomes a werewolf.

Sam is looking into Dean's eyes as he sees them change. Sam quickly pulls back his hand.

Dean closes his eyes. "I'm okay. It's just the sound of him changing. That's all." Dean turns his back. "You should go Sam." He quickly puts his earbuds on and lays down letting the music drown out the sounds of the other werewolf.

Sam goes to the other cage and witnesses the darts being shot at the werewolf that will cure him. Within 30 seconds he is back to his normal human self.

They wait 30 minutes before using the taser on him again. They get the same results. He stays human.

Sam opens the cage door and places a blanket over him. His name is Sergei.

The tech takes Sergei's vitals and draws blood. Sergei begins to look very pale. He passes out. They check for a pulse, none. They get him on the ground and attempt CPR. A tech has a defibrillator charging.

Crowley shakes his head. "You can stop. He left with a reaper. He's gone."

Crowley touches the body. "He had a heart attack. He was in his 40's. The zap from the taser could have done him in, not the cure." Crowley snaps and the body vanishes. "Do you want to test another one?"

Dean yells across the room. "TEST ME!"

Sam faces Crowley. "Put me in Dean's cage and give us some privacy."

"If he bites you..."

Sam doesn't want to hear it. "JUST DO IT!"

Crowley snaps and Sam is suddenly standing beside Dean and the cage is covered by a giant tarp. Inside there are lamps turned on for light.

Sam pulls Dean into a tight embrace.

Dean hears Sam's heart and his mouth waters. He refuses to think about it.

"If anything happens to you, I had to at least get to..." Sam can't finish.

"I know." Dean kisses Sam as if he might not ever get to again.

Dean has his hands on Sam's face as he kisses him. His fingers move through his hair and then his arms move around his neck.

Sam holds Dean as their kiss ends. His hands reach up under Dean's shirt just to feel his skin. His hands against his body.

Dean lowers his arms and places his hands under Sam's shirt at his waist while they kiss. The sound of Sam's heart echoes in his ears.

"Don't get dead." Sam refuses to shed any tears because his brother will defy death as he always has.

"No promises. I've noticed something though. For some reason, the grave doesn't want me Sammy." Dean kisses Sam's neck.

"Don't joke." Sam can't take jokes right now.

"Okay. Look." Dean steps back looking into Sam's soulful eyes. He's also grateful to be a step further from the smell of his fresh tasty heart. He swallows. "I got this." He's assuring himself more than he is Sam.

Sam nods.

Dean sees Sam's pain and worry. He can't not comfort him. He caresses him. "I love you." A kiss to make it better. Sam's too old for that now.

"I love you more." Sam places his hand on Dean's chest. One more kiss and it's soft, but heartfelt.

Sam steps back. "OKAY CROWLEY!!"

Sam is suddenly standing beside Crowley.

Dean is now in chains and inside the small cage in front of them. Crowley at least let Dean keep his dignity by keeping his jeans on. All other clothing has vanished. "Why do I suddenly feel like Bruce Banner?"

Crowley looks confused. "Who?"

Sam smiles. "I get it."

Dean winks at Sam. "Damn right you get it. We grew up watching that show."

"And reading the comics." Sam adds.

Dean shrugs. "Whatever."

While distracted, Dean gets zapped with the taser.

"OWWWGGRRRRAAAAARRRRRR!!"   
Dean quickly turns into a werewolf. He pulls at his chains trying to get free.

Sam yells, "DEAN STOP!"

Dean stops and looks at Sam. He then gets hit by the darts with the cure. He roars again, but he sees Sam and whines. Within 30 seconds he becomes normal Dean again.

Dean is sitting on the steel bench that's made to the cage as he tries to catch his breath.

Sam asks, "How do you feel?"

Dean smiles at Sam. "I'm okay. A little tired."

A tech opens the cage and takes his vitals. He takes some blood too.

Sam gives his brother a bottle of water and a blanket. They touch hands.

Dean whispers, "Thanks Sammy." He then quickly downs the water.

30 minutes pass and Dean gets zapped again. Of course there's no werewolf. Just Dean cussing like a sailor.

Crowley snaps and Dean is in his big, uncovered cage again. He's fully dressed and sitting on the bed.

Sam is about to get very angry that Dean vanished. He looks at Crowley.

Crowley points to the cage and Sam sees that Dean is in there safe and sound. "Now if you'll excuse me for a little while, I have hell to raise and deals to manage."

Crowley hesitates holding up a finger and looking toward the ground. He thinks a moment then looks like he just remembered something. "Ah, yes!"

He snaps and a beautiful tiny woman appears who looks mean. "This is Yang. If anything should happen and you need me, tell Yang. I'll return A.S.A.P.." Crowley vanishes while Yang finds a spot against a wall to stand watch.

Sam goes to be by Dean's side, even if bars are between them. "Are you okay?"

Dean sits with his shoulder against the bars and his legs stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles. Sam looks at him with concern. Dean squeezes Sam's hand, "I really am okay."

A demon approaches the brothers. "So, the Righteous Man and the Boy King." He scoffs. "I'm not impressed."

Sam doesn't look at him. He just says, "Go. Away."

Dean gives the guy a glance. The demon isn't leaving. Dean scoffs and rolls his eyes, "Dude, you've been warned."

The demon pulls a knife on Sam.

Sam grabs his hand holding the knife and punches him in the throat faster than he can blink. The demon's choking.

Out of nowhere, Yang appears with an angel blade. She quickly stabs the demon in the back. His face and body flashing with that familiar orange flickering glow as he passes away to oblivion.

Yang retrieves her blade and wipes it off on the demon's shirt. She then addresses Sam. "I apologize for his behavior, Mr. Winchester. All demons have been instructed to either treat you, and your family, with respect during your time here or avoid you completely. If they can't do that, this is what will become of them."

Two other demons are already disposing of his body.

Sam gives Yang a slight head nod, "Thank you."

"If you need anything, please let me know." Yang walks away and returns to her former position against the far wall, standing watch.

Sam whispers to Dean, "I wish we could just leave, but we can't. We need to find out what the Men of Letters did to our mother." The more Sam thinks about what they've done to him and his family, the more angry he gets.

Dean thinks the demon attack is what really upset Sam. He wonders if the smell of demon blood gets to him like it use to. "I'm here Sammy."

Sam looks at Dean and longs to be closer to him. He turns toward Yang. "I want in the cage."

Yang doesn't argue. She has a key and uses it to let Sam inside and locks the door behind him. "If he turns, get as far from him as you can."

"I know." Sam nod. Sam's convinced the cure worked.

Dean's back on the bed. He's completely exhausted. Sam goes to him. Dean makes room under his blanket and Sam curls up against Dean's front as best as he can. Sam's head is buried beneath Dean's chin. Dean is fingering Sam's hair. Both of them are breathing each other in. Sam finally says it, "I can't go through this again."

"Shhh. I know Sammy. I know. Just close your eyes and rest now." Dean feels Sam's hurt and wants to make it go away. He always wants to make his pain go away. He never can though. All he can do is suffer beside him.

It doesn't take long until they're both asleep.

~~~~~

Sam is dreaming that he has taken over hell. He snaps his fingers and a demon turns to dust. He walks past a mirror and sees his reflection. He's wearing a white suit and his eyes are glowing red.

~~~~~

"Well aren't you the cutest couple?"

Sam is startled awake by the sound of Crowley's voice. He's standing right over him and Dean.

Dean groans, "Fuck off."

"Such language! You kiss your mother with that mouth?" He scratches his scruffy face. "Speaking of the lady Winchester, she hasn't taken too kindly to her incarceration."

Both Sam and Dean are now sitting on the side of the bed facing Crowley. Sam is flattening his crazy hair.

Dean fixes his shirts while giving Crowley that _Are you kidding me?_ look Dean gets, "Come on man! Who would be happy being locked up in hell? Seriously!"

Crowley now rubs his eyes and tries to explain better, "She's on the verge of hurting herself unless she gets her freedom."

Sam and Dean look at each other and nod. Dean says, "She'd do it."

"It's been long enough. I think the cure is a success." Crowley shrugs.

Dean stands up in front of Crowley. "You have the taser?"

Crowley snaps and it appears in his hand. "Yes."

Dean sighs and steels himself for the jolt. "Do it."

Sam steps back and demons have tranquilizer guns ready.

Crowley zaps Dean. Dean grits his teeth and curses under his breath, but no werewolf transformation. His eyes stay a vivid green and there are no fangs or claws.

Crowley puts the taser in his pocket. "Success!" He snaps and the cage door is open.

The three of them exit the cage.


	13. Curing Mary Winchester

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: It's the weekend. I decided to post this next-to-the-last chapter. Tomorrow I will post chapter 15, the final chapter. I hope you've enjoyed the story so far.❤
> 
> P.S. - I wrote this chapter before episode 300 came out showing Dean playing with a perfume bottle and fire coming out called "Dragon's Breath". What can I say, great minds. Right?"

Crowley has an idea on how to cure Mary. "Now, about your mum. I think I have an idea. Remember when I went into Moose's giant skull to get that angel out?"

Dean yells, "We're NOT putting NEEDLES in her head!"

Sam adds, "Or letting you POSSESS her!"

Crowley scowls and yells. "WILL YOU MORONS SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!" He starts pacing to calm himself. "We have access to a machine that will allow you to share your memories with her. If you.." he points at Dean. "...have childhood memories of being with mummy and dadums, she can see herself in your memories and it could ignite her own memories causing them to return."

Dean looks at Sam. Sam nods and says, "It's worth a try."

Crowley snaps and Mary appears in a small cage, just like Dean was in. Her hands are chained down so she can't grab at the techs or equipment as they go in and attach leads to her head that have wires bundled up going to a computer.

Mary yells, "What are you doing to me?!"

Dean hates this. "It's okay Mary. No one's going to hurt you."

She sees a tech attaching leads to Dean's head and relaxes. Wires going to the same computer.

A scientist comes forward. "Hello. My name is Dr. Thomas Schaffer. My assistant is now injecting you both with a serum that will put you into a state of hypnosis. Dean, how old were you when you had the most vivid good memories of your parents?"

Dean clears his throat as the lab assistant injects him with the serum. "Um. I was about four."

"Okay." The doctor types on the computer. "Dean, concentrate on when you were 4 years old and happy with your mom and dad. Only good and happy memories, okay?"

Dean is now smiling big. He sounds like a little boy. "Okay."

"Tell me what you're doing with your mom and dad?"

Dean has his eyes closed and he's remembering a happy time with his parents. "We're at the park. I love going to the park. Daddy pushes me on the swing."

Sam is smiling at Dean's little boy voice.

The doctor asks, "What is mommy doing?"

Dean smiles. "She's holding Sammy and watching me swing." Dean yells, "LOOK MOMMY! SEE HOW HIGH I CAN GO!! I'M FLYING!!"

Mary's eyes are closed as she's crying. She lifts her hand and waves. She's also seeing Dean's memories. "I see you baby!!"

At hearing Mary's voice in the room, something changes in Dean. "Mommy?"

The doctor sees Dean's brain waves spiking erratically. "Dean! Remember, I said happy memories!"

Dean's face is one of terror, "Daddy! Why is mommy burning up there?!"

Mary can't breath. Her eyes are wide open in terror seeing nothing. When she can get a breath she yells out, "JOOOOOHHHHNNNNN!!!!!!"

Sam yells at the doctor, "STOP IT NOW!!!!"

The doctor severs the connection between Dean and his mom. Mary instantly collapses, unconscious. Dean is still out of breath, but he's confused about what just happened. He feels like he's in a drug induced haze. He tries to remember what he was seeing, but he can't. It's like waking up from a dream you can't remember.

Sam shakes his head. "I was afraid of this."

The doctor looks confused.

Sam explains. "Mary died in a house fire in front of Dean when he was four. She was just recently brought back to life."

The doctor looks at Crowley. "Don't look at me." Crowley points to the ceiling. "Upper management gave her a second chance at life. She's one of a select few." Crowley gives Dean a stern look. "It's actually in their DNA."

Sam rolls his eyes at Crowley as he takes the leads off his mother's head and tries waking her. "Come on mom, wake up."

She moans. "Sam? Sam, what is it?"

Sam smiles because it worked. He gets the chains off her wrists and hugs her tight. "Mom. I love you."

She just hugs him back. Her last memories of Sam and Dean in bed together still have her conflicted, but she still loves her babies. Tears fall for her dead husband and her sons that she doesn't know what to do about. She feels lost.

Sam goes to his brother.

Dean has the leads off of his head and he's standing next to Crowley. He looks exhausted.

Sam asks, "Can we go home now?"

Crowley smirks, "I'll take you to your Batmobile."

Dean just grins ear to ear at hearing Baby being referred to as the Batmobile.

Mary places her hand on Crowley's shoulder. "Can you just send me to the bunker? I can't be in the Impala. Too many memories." She's crying.

Crowley feels for her. "Of course dear lady." He looks at Sam and Dean. "I'll be right back boys." He places a hand on Mary's shoulder and they disappear.

Sam looks over his shoulder and sees another woman standing next to Yang. She looks identical to her except not as mean. He wonders to himself if her name is Yin.

Crowley returns looking at Dean. "I left her with your pigeon. She seemed happy to see him." He smirks.

Dean rolls his eyes.

Crowley looks toward Yang. She approaches him. He gives her orders, "Make sure everyone is where they should be when I return. I want this place emptied." He then walks toward one of the lab tables and picks up 2 boxes. He pockets one. The other he hands to Dean.

Dean opens the box and sees a syringe full of amber liquid and a syringe full of blue liquid. Both are clearly marked.

"Those are the cures for vampirism and Lycanthropy. Underneath, on the paper, are the recipes to make them. It won't do me any good." He shrugs, almost bored. "Demons are naturally vaccinated."

He lifts an eyebrow and his hands. "If you flannel wearing wonders are ready?"

Sam and Dean nod.

Crowley places his hands on their shoulders and they are instantly outside standing next to Baby.

Crowley vanishes as soon as the brothers are next to the Impala.

Sam pulls the keys from his pocket and heads for the driver's door. Dean gets into the passenger seat with no argument.

Once inside the car, Dean sets the box with the cures in the back seat while Sam starts the car. It's after 1am and pitch dark outside.

Before Sam can put the car into reverse to back out from where it's parked, Dean slides up close to Sam, grabs his face with both hands and kisses him.

Sam is stunned at first, but immediately turns toward Dean and pulls him closer. He parts his lips and deepens their kiss inviting Dean's tongue inside. They kiss like this for a while.

Dean reaches up and kills the ignition. He presses Sam against the door while kissing him. Sam turns his body toward Dean and Dean gets his knees on either side of Sam's hips.

Sam pulls Dean's shirts off. Dean gets Sam's off. They don't talk. They just touch and look into each other's eyes as best they can under the dim moon light.

Dean leaves a trail of kisses from Sam's lips, chin, jaw, neck, collarbone, chest and nipple. He spends time licking them both just a bit knowing Sam doesn't like nipple play as much as he does. He then kisses his way down his stomach.

Sam is breathing heavy with his hand gently moving through his brothers short hair. He watches Dean's lips move over his body and it has him so hard. He's aching to feel Dean's warm mouth around his cock.

Dean removes Sam's shoes then pulls down Sam's pants and boxers. He then removes his own boots, jeans and underwear.

Dean pauses as he sees Sam completely naked in front of him. "Sammy."

"Touch me." Sam takes Dean's hand and places it on his chest over his pounding heart.

Dean closes his eyes and just feels. Sam places his hand on Dean's chest. His heart is racing just as fast.

Sam lays down more across the seats so Dean can lay down on top of him. Bodies coming together. Sam baring all of Dean's weight with ease.

Dean bunches up his jeans to place under Sam's head. He kisses Sam with his fingers in Sam's hair.

Sam grips the curve of Dean's back and his butt cheek as he grinds upward. Their cocks are in perfect alignment while Sam creates friction with his thrusts.

After a few minutes Sam lifts his legs around Dean's waist. Kisses are more frantic. Biting bottom lips and sucking of tongues. Sam gasps, "I need you Dean. Please!"

"Shhh." Dean kisses Sam more softly. Hand stroking his cheek. "I got you brother." He sits up and gets the lube from the glove box.

Sam stretches his legs up over the back of the seat and up on Dean's shoulder. Dean uses the lube to stretch Sam open on his fingers. Once he has 3 fingers inside his brother, Sam is all but fucking himself on Dean's fingers and begging for Dean's cock.

"Hurry Dean! Please! I need you!" Sam's cock is very hard and leaking all over himself. Dean has been steady stroking his prostate and it's all Sam can do to not cum.

Dean lubes himself and presses against Sam's hole. He starts pushing in and leans over his brother. As he moves his hips to meet Sam's, he's kissing Sam's gaping mouth. Licks at his lips. "Fuck Sammy. You're so tight."

Sam wraps his legs around Dean's waist trying to get him as deep as he possibly can. "Deeper! Dean! Need to be closer!" He's trembling. "I need you!"

Dean thrusts his cock in as deep as he can. He holds Sam's body as close to himself as possible. "I'm here Sammy. Right here." He kisses Sam's temple. After a minute he starts thrusting his hips. He looks into Sam's eyes. "Sammy, look at me."

Sam looks into Dean's brilliant green eyes as he makes love to him.

"We made it. We're okay." He thrusts harder with a grunt. He's breathless. Lips constantly pressing against Sam's face, lips or neck.

Sam nods as he throws his head back just feeling everything. His nails are digging into Dean's back, ass and shoulders. He's moving his hips in a counter motion to Dean's thrusts. He looks into Dean's eyes yet again. He gasps out, "Harder. Make me cum."

Dean readjust his knee position. He lifts Sam's thighs so his ass is at a better angle as he thrusts harder and deeper into Sam. Sam uses his lower back muscles to lift his ass up higher too. They both watch as Sam's body is jolted over and over with each thrust given by Dean's powerful hips.

Sam keeps his head from hitting the door by keeping his arms over his head and pushing against the door with every incredible thrust. Sweat rolls off of Dean's face and body as he gets closer and closer to his climax.

"Feels so good! I'm almost there!" Sam moans. His cock is stiff as a board. He feels his balls drawing up. "Oh fuck! Dean!" They both watch Sam's cock jerk and spurt out over 10 spasms of cum all over Sam's body. First few hitting his chin and cheek.

Dean feels Sam's insides tighten with his orgasm. He keeps thrusting against Sam's prostate prolonging Sam's Climax.

Dean leans over Sam and kisses him as he thrust a few more times. He licks the cum off Sam's cheek and chin. The taste of his Sammy is like home for Dean. It's all too much. He gasps, "Sammy... Oh fuck." He makes sure he's deep inside his brother when he finds his release. It seems to go on forever. He feels Sam's arms holding him tight and his legs around him like a vise.

His body is spent. He is still breathing heavy. "Don't let me go Sammy."

Sam has a tight grip on his brother. His lips fused to the spot right below his ear. "Never... you're mine... I'm yours... always."

They slowly loosen up and kiss for a bit. Dean exits Sam's body and Sam feels cum oozing out. Dean quickly uses one of his own shirts to clean up Sam's bottom after cleaning off their chests.

They dress and hit up a fast food place on the way to the bunker.

"Do you think mom remembers seeing us together?" Sam is tapping the steering wheel nervously the closer they get to the bunker.

"Yes." Dean has the junk food trash gathered in a bag.

"What do you think she will do?" Sam is deeply concerned.

Dean sees Sam's concern and takes his hand in his own. "Remember what we decided before?"

"If she can't accept us like this it's her loss."

"Exactly. We lived without a mom all this time. Right?" He kissed Sam's hand.

Sam nods. "I just hope she reconsiders."

"Me too." Dean continues to comfort Sam until they get to the bunker.

Sam suggests, "If she is still upset, I suggest we get Cas to erase it from her memory the way he did _"she whom I must not name or get my nose broke"_."

Dean sighs heavily. "Let me think about that one." He pauses for a moment. "Let's just hope she'll be more understanding. Okay?"

Sam nods as he parks Baby in the garage. Dean grabs the nasty shirt to put it in the washer.

~~~~~

The brothers walk into the library and find both Cas and their mom sitting at a table talking. Cas stands up and greets them. "Can I speak to the both of you alone for a minute."

Dean puts the nasty shirt in his dirty clothes hamper and grabs a Snickers from his nightstand. He goes back out into the library eating his candy.

The three men go into the garage and shut the door. They then get into Baby and shut the car doors. Cas sighs, "I'm sorry about the secrecy, but Mary can't hear this."

Dean finishes his candy and takes a drink from a bottle of water. "Sorry."

Sam's eager to know about their mom. "It's fine Cas. What's going on?"

"Mary was extremely upset about the two of you being intimate. She explained to me that incest in today's society is absolutely immoral and wrong. It's one of the absolute worse things anyone can do next to matricide." Cas rolls his eyes.

"What did you tell her?" Sam's getting impatient. Dean takes his hand and holds it trying to calm him.

"I tried to tell her that the two of you are in fact soul mates. That heaven put the two of you together for a reason. It's fate and destiny. She disagrees and nothing I can say will convince her otherwise. So, I erased the event from her mind. She never saw you two having sex."

Sam smiles at Cas, "Good idea Cas. Wish I would have thought of that."

Sam lightly slaps Dean's thigh and gives him a face that says _"I told you so!"_

Dean just smirks at Sam. He then realizes something. "So, Sam and I now have to act like non-soul mated brothers around her again."

Cas gives a shrug. "Unless you want her to find out again."

Dean is so damn frustrated. "Whatever." He gets out and heads back inside.

Cas asks Sam, "Did I do something wrong?"

"No. He's just frustrated because others keep changing his life around him. Crowley turned him into a vampire, cured him, turned him into a werewolf, cured him and now this."

Cas is in the back seat. Sam asks Cas to hand him the box with the cures in it. Sam opens it and shows Cas the syringes. He closes the box.

They both go inside the bunker and Sam becomes busy with filing the box into the Men of Letters archives.

Mary is curious as to what Sam's doing. Sam explains. She's fascinated that there's now a cure for two very terrifying monsters. Sam explains further, "These are cures for recently turned vamps or werewolves. Ones that just turned within a few days. We cured a werewolf that was turned years ago, but the scientists suggested we stick to curing only recently turned werewolves."

Mary puts John's journal on the table. "You should document it."

Sam smiles, "Good idea." He finishes making a MOL file and index catalog file card. He then sits and writes all about the BMOL headquarters in America and their fall. Why and what he learned.

He remembered he collected weapons from the BMOL and retrieves them from Baby. He lays them out and knows what half of them are. The other half are foreign to him. Literally.

Mary picks one up that looks like an egg. "Hyperbolic Pulse Generator. It can exorcise an angel or demon from it's vessel."

She picks up a capsule. "AVD. Anti-Vampire Device. Releases a gas toxic to vampires, but harmless to humans."

She picks up a gun. "VIR. Vampire Irradiation Gun. It messes with their DNA somehow and kills them. Faster than using a machete." She smiles.

She picks up brass knuckles. "Enochian Brass Knuckles. Angels don't know what hit them."

She picks up a chrome tube. "WEB. Werewolf Exhaustion Bomb. If you're in a pack of werewolves, this bomb emits a cloud that alters their DNA. It will render them all too weak to move or shift back to their human form. Easy to behead or get to their hearts with silver."

The last one looks like a pen light. No bigger than an expensive fountain pen. Mary picks it up and smiles at Sam. "We need to go outside." They start heading for the door. "Have you watched the Harry Potter movies?"

Sam laughs. "Yes."

"You'll love this!"

They get outside and Mary points the "pen" toward nothing. "This is called Dragon's Breath." She presses something and suddenly there is a gigantic burst of flames emitting from the small device. Enough flames to engulf an entire car all at once. She releases whatever she pushes to activate it. "This is used to kill Rugarus and other monsters, burn evidence, and ignite graves. Use with caution."

Sam asks if he can try it. She shows him how. He makes it work and the flames are huge. "Does it ever run out of fuel?"

She laughs. "I asked the same thing. No, it runs on Men of Letters magic." She pats her son's back.

They both go back inside. 


	14. Just One Fit of Anger

Dean's standing in the War Room with his arms crossed next to Cas. They're watching Sam and Mary come down the spiral stairs after testing the "Dragon's Breath" weapon Sam brought back from the BMOL headquarters.

"What were you doing?" Dean is not too happy.

Sam pauses at Dean's attitude. He's at one end of the map table and Dean is at the other end. "Checking out a weapon. Why?"

Dean just shakes his head and walks off. Sam follows him toward Dean's bedroom.

Mary asks Cas, "What was that all about?"

Cas shrugs. "They bicker a lot. Dean is overly protective of Sam and Sam is finally putting his foot down after being under Dean's watchful eyes his whole life. Thing is Dean doesn't want Sam to "fly away" just because he's finally "found his wings"."

Cas grins at himself for not only coming up with the clever metaphors, but for keeping the truth hidden. Although, he wasn't really lying about Sam wanting to be more independent of his older brother. He doesn't need Dean hovering like a guardian.

Cas remembers how he had to learn to back off when he was hovering over Dean too much. Not just invading his personal space, but constantly wanting to watch over him and protect him. Cas learned that Dean can truly take care of himself. If Dean needs help, he'll pray for it.

Mary finishes putting the weapons back in the duffle, but leaves them on the library table. She hears her sons arguing. Raised voices, but unable to hear what's being said. "Cas, would you care to join me for some coffee?"

Cas doesn't enjoy food or drink. They're just molecules. "Yes. Thank you." He does this human gesture to make Mary more comfortable as they talk. They'll most likely sit and talk about her sons. He won't mind. After all, they are his reason for existing at the moment.

~~~~~

Sam follows Dean into his bedroom and shuts the door. "What's your problem?"

"You and mom took off and I freaked out. That's all!" He kicks his small, empty, trash can and it goes flying into his dresser and hits Sam in his shin.

Sam grabs his lower leg and sits on Dean's bed trying not to yell too loudly, "Real mature Dean!"

Sam lifts his pant leg and there's a minor cut on his shin. It's going to bruise up.

Dean starts heading for the door.

"No! Where do you think you're going?" Sam has him by the arm.

"First aid kit and ice." Dean feels bad.

Sam is standing up against the door. He points to the bed. "I'm fine. Go sit down. We need to talk."

Dean gives Sam a certain look that tells him _I'm only going to sit down because I want to, not because you told me to._

Sam sits next to his brother. "You need to get over whatever it is that's eating you. Is it because we can't do THIS out there?" Sam grabs Dean into his arms and kisses him.

Dean is blindsided by Sam's arms suddenly engulfing him and his lips assaulting his, but he needed this more than he realized. He grips Sam's hair and pulls. He gets forceful with his kiss and bites at Sam's lip.

Sam punches Dean's chest to get him to stop biting him and let go of his hair. "WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM? DID I DO SOMETHING?" Sam touches his bottom lip and his fingers come back bloody.

Dean gets up and starts pacing. "I CAN'T DO THIS! WE CAN'T DO THIS HERE!" He hits the brick wall with his fist. He stops and looks at Sam. There's a flash of glowing orangish yellow to his eyes.

Sam stays calm as he approaches Dean. "Dean, listen to me. You need to calm down. Please. Take deep breathes. Do it for me."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes and sees the worry there. "What is it?"

Sam is standing in front of Dean and touching his cheek softly. "I'm sorry I upset you. Okay? Just breathe."

Dean takes slow deep breaths unconsciously trying to match Sam's slow steady breathing. "I'm sorry I hurt you. Why did I do that?"

Sam holds Dean in his arms. "The cure is failing. I saw your eyes start to turn just now."

Dean purposefully stays calm. He holds onto Sam like a lifeline. "Are you sure? I mean, are you sure you weren't imagining..."

"Your eyes turned for just a second, but they turned Dean." Sam comforts his brother. Hand in his hair and his cheek pressed against his jaw.

Dean pulls away and looks at his hands as if looking for claws. His knuckles, that had hurt and should be bloody from punching the brick wall, are now completely healed. "I need Cas to take me to Garth. Maybe he can help me learn to live with this."

"We'll figure out the right cure." Sam's reaching out to Dean's hand.

Dean looks at Sam. "Meanwhile, I need to be someplace safe. Not a cage and not the dungeon."

Sam walks into Dean's arms. "I can't be away from you. Not now."

Dean is so quiet. "You'll have to come with."

Sam looks up from where he had his head on Dean's shoulder. Dean strokes Sam's face and wipes at the blood drying on his bottom lip. "I bit you Sammy. I'm so sorry. I didn't know."

Sam's eyes tear up. "But you weren't a werewolf when you..."

"It doesn't matter. If I'm still infected and I bit you, you're infected." Dean kisses his cheek where a tear fell.

"Your bloodwork came back clean. You were cured. I don't understand how you can be infected again." Sam wipes at his face. Angry at his own tears as much as the werewolf virus that is infecting his brother and most likely himself now.

Dean fingers Sam's hair again. "Clean up your face and then I'll pray for Cas."

Sam uses Dean's sink in his room to wash his face and make sure his lip isn't bleeding any more.

Dean prays, "Cas, I'm praying because I'm not cured of the werewolf thing. I might have infected Sam too. I need you to send us to Garth's home."

After close to an hour Cas knocks on Dean's door and Sam lets him in. Cas starts out by saying, "Mary was exhausted. She went to bed. I'll explain to her whatever you want me to tell her tomorrow."

Dean nods. "That's good. I'm apparently not cured and I bit Sam's lip. I wasn't a werewolf when I bit him, but we don't want to take any chances. If you could take us to Garth's ranch in Grantburgh, Wisconsin it would be a great help. We'd take Baby, but it's not a good idea to risk me getting a case of road rage and wolfing out."

Cas gets a slight grin. "Completely understandable. You've been to this ranch before?"

"Yes." Dean nods.

Cas touches Dean's head for a moment. "I can take you there. Are you ready?"

Sam hangs up his phone. "Yeah. Garth is expecting us any minute. I just need to grab some things."

Sam quickly packs a duffle full of clothes, toiletries and bullets for his gun. He did toss in a box of silver bullets too. Dean also packs a duffle.

In less than 10 minutes the 3 of them are outside of Garth's home.

Garth greets them at the door and invites them in. He hugs everyone, of course. "Long time no see amigos. How have you been?"

Sam just sighs.

Dean smirks, "British Men of Letters and Crowley...."

Dean tells Garth and Bess, Garth's wife who joins them, the whole story about the BMOL and Crowley.

Garth says he can help. "It's 50/50 as to whether Sam's infected or not."

(Dean explained he was mad at Sam and a brotherly kiss on the cheek became a bite on the lip out of anger and a fight ensued. Garth said he understands how things like that happen, but they shouldn't. Dean and Sam said they both made up and aren't mad at each other any more.)

Garth said he needs to see if Dean is a werewolf. He picks up a small wolf figurine made of silver using a napkin. He touched it to Dean's arm. Not only does Dean's flesh burn, Dean's eyes also change and return to normal quickly. "Yep, you're one of us. Sorry." Garth sighs.

He looks at Sam and then touches his arm. Same thing happens, only claws start to come out of Sam's fingers and he starts to go through his first change.

Dean's in Sam's face. "Sammy! Look at me! Just breathe! Calm down and breathe!"

Sam's eyes are still glowing golden in color, but his fangs and claws start receding. After a few more seconds, his eyes return to their multicolored hazel. Sam has all kinds of endorphins flowing and he's feeling energetic.

Dean pulls his brother over to the sofa and they sit down together. "I'm so sorry Sammy."

"I'm okay Dean. Really." Sam's letting Dean comfort him even though he really does feel okay.

Garth sits on the love seat next to Bess across from Sam and Dean. Cas is in a side chair.

Garth explains, "Because your brothers, there's a special dynamic that will be beneficial for you both. Something I didn't have till Bess found me." He holds Bess's hand.

Sam and Dean look at each other.

Garth continues, "If one of you changes the other can reign him in and he'll listen. He won't listen to anyone else while in lycan form. It has something to do with sharing the same womb. For me, it was finding my soul mate."

Cas starts saying, "Well..." Dean kicks Cas's foot and Cas gives Dean a look.

"Oh, sorry Cas." Dean tells Cas with his eyes, _SHUT UP ABOUT SOUL MATES!_

Cas stands up. "I'm going to leave Sam and Dean here for now." He looks at Dean, "Just call me later. My phone is on. I'll come get you when you're ready."

Dean grins. "Thanks Cas."

Cas vanishes.

Garth smiles. "It must be pretty neat having an angel as a bestie."

Dean fake smiles. "It's cool beans."

Garth knows Dean is grumpy. "Have you two resigned yourselves to this or are you trying to find a cure?"

Sam speaks up quickly, "We haven't decided yet. We thought Dean was cured and it failed. We need to decide if we're going to try again for the cure or stay like this."

Dean looks at Sam. "This isn't that bad."

"Until one of us shifts and the other isn't around." Sam's always the pessimist.

"You both would be welcomed into our community." Bess is so friendly. Garth gives her a squeeze. He looks at the brothers, "You could finally retire."

Dean shakes his head, "We can't retire. Too many people need us to fight what they don't believe exists so they can sleep at night."

Garth sighs, "We aren't the only hunters out there and you won't live forever Dean. When you die, the world will still be here with just as many monsters. There's no quota of lives you must save. It's not your responsibility to save the world."

Garth wasn't there when Chuck and Amara ascended. Dean asked "God" why is he leaving? The world needs "God". Chuck simply told Dean that the world was in good hands because he's leaving it in the care of Dean and Sam Winchester. In that moment Dean literally felt the weight of the world on his shoulders. He thought, _Gee, thanks Chuck. No pressure here._

Sam answers for him and his brother, "We need some time to think about it and talk it over."

Garth nods, "That's totally understandable. Let me show you two where you'll be bunking while you're here." Garth leads them to a room with 2 beds. One is a queen the other is a fold out sofa bed.

The brothers immediately drop their duffles and play "rock-paper-scissors" for who gets the queen. Sam wins. Again.

Sam laughs, "Always with the scissors." He plops his bag on the bed.

Dean places his bag on the floor by the sofa. "Maybe I lost on purpose because I wanted the sofa."

Sam just rolls his eyes. "You keep telling yourself that Dean."

Garth leaves the brothers alone to settle in with the door closed behind him. Sam makes sure it's locked.

Dean walks up to Sam and they embrace each other. "I'm so sorry I got you into this Sammy."

Sam kisses Dean's neck. "It's not your fault. You didn't know. Besides, I'd rather things be just like this. We'll deal with it together."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. "No. I didn't want this for you." His eyes are so sad.

Sam can't do anything to change how Dean feels. All he can do is show Dean how he feels. "I'm right here with you. That's all that matters." He kisses Dean and makes sure he feels his unconditional love. A bond nothing, not even a werewolf curse, can break.

Dean pushes Sam onto the floor. He's about to take Sam's pants off when Sam holds Dean's hands. Sam talks softly, "Not in the house. They can hear everything. Listen beyond our door."

Dean listens and he can hear Bess doing dishes in the kitchen. He can clearly hear the water running and the dishes rattle. He can hear Garth talking... he's baby talking to his infant... son as he changes his diaper. Dean whispers, "I didn't know Garth had a baby."

Also whispering, "Me neither. You see why we can't..." Sam waves his hand over his crotch area. "We'd need to go for a walk." He sighs and gives Dean a grin before pulling him in for a heated kiss.

Dean gets up and gives Sam a hand up off the floor. They straighten up their clothes and sit beside each other on the sofa.

Dean takes Sam's hand and holds it in both of his on his lap. "I don't want to quit hunting. To be completely honest with you..." Dean looks away while saying this. "I... I enjoy killing bad things."

Sam quickly responds so Dean doesn't have to continue. "I know you have a need to kill and I understand it. You've done it your whole life. I also know that shooting Bambi won't cut it. Being a werewolf might be the most dangerous thing for us both. I'm being honest with you now..." Sam's eyes change color. "I'm hungry. I mean really hungry."

"Breathe Sammy. Just take deep breaths." Dean holds Sam's face in his hands and strokes his cheeks with his thumbs.

Sam takes deep breaths and looks into Dean's green eyes. He finds inner peace and his heartbeat slows down.

Dean sees Sam's eyes return to their beautiful hazel.

"There you go." Dean kisses Sam's forehead. "We have to decide fast Sammy. Stay like this or cure. Once we feed, I think there's no going back."

Sam nods. "I agree. We should summon Crowley. Try one more time for a cure. If it fails, we come back here for good."

Dean pulls out his cellphone. "I can call the bastard. If he won't answer, we'll summon."

Sam shrugs. Should have known Dean had Crowley on speed dial.

After a couple minutes on the phone Crowley appears in front of the brothers. "Hello boys." He looks around the room. It's a typical farmhouse and looks very cozy. Crowley has his own thoughts, "You two have decided to become the American Gothic incarnate I see. Which one of you will have the pitch fork I wonder?" He stares at Sam. "Moose?" His eyebrows raised.

Sam just gives him the middle finger. Crowley cracks a grin.

"Cut it out you two. We need to let Garth know we're leaving." Dean opens the door to find Garth standing right outside the door.

"Sorry." Garth seems embarrassed. "I sensed something and then heard a new voice. I was making sure you boys were okay." He glares at the king of hell. "Crowley."

"Hello Garth." Crowley nods.

Dean looks confused. "Have you two met?"

Garth replies, "Only once. I was busting a crossroads demon and he showed up. He apologized for his demon's..." Garth is trying to remember the exact word.

"Malfeasance." Crowley replies.

"Yes! Malfeasance and promised me his demon would get his just punishment." Garth just rolls his eyes with his arms crossed.

"Oh he did. He's cleaning toilets."

Garth, Dean and Sam look at Crowley with confusion.

Crowley shakes his head. "Morons. He's in hell! He's cleaning dirty toilets for all eternity." Crowley is now rolling his eyes while the others are making faces of pure disgust. "If we're done here, I'd like to get going. I have hell to tend to."

Dean explains to Garth that he and Sam are leaving with Crowley. They want to try one last time to find a cure.

"If it doesn't work out, you boys have a home here." Garth goes in for a hug with Dean first. He then hugs Sam.

Sam pats Garth's back. "Tell Bess we said bye and thank you for having us."

They leave with Crowley, taking their duffle bags with them, and arrive in the same cage they were in last time. Same furniture. Same everything. The lab is set up, but not all of the scientists have arrived yet.

Crowley is outside the cage standing beside Yang. "Yang is in charge while I'm away. The scientists and lab techs are already busy."

A lab tech approaches the cage door. Yang unlocks it. The techs go in and take blood samples from both Sam and Dean. They leave and the cage door locks behind them.

Crowley scoffs, "Never thought I'd see the day that Lucifer is free and the Winchesters are in a cage."

Dean speaks for both brothers, "Fuck you Crowley."

Sam's eye change and he growls deeply.

Crowley looks at Dean. "Better calm your wolf-moose brother or it's the dog house for him." Crowley looks toward the demons pointing dart guns at Sam.

Dean takes deep breaths as he ignores the guns pointing at his brother. He turns Sam's head toward him. "Ignore that asshole. Look at me Sammy. Just look at me."

Sam's eyes return to normal.

"He's fine. You all go away now and let us be until you find a cure. Go on now!" Dean's protecting Sam by holding him.

Sam keeps his arms around Dean and closes his eyes.

Everyone goes about their business leaving the brothers alone.


	15. Finding A Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOTE: Here it is! The final chapter! I hope everyone enjoyed reading "Trouble Sleeping" as much as I did writing it. I'm already in the process of writing a new story that so far has been so intense, there's been zero opportunity for any sexual anything for Sam or Dean with each other or anyone. I'm amazed at how some stories write themselves. It's about witch-like monsters called Baba Yagas. I hope you read it when I start posting it sometime within the next week.
> 
> Thanks again for reading my stories. Please comment afterward and let me know what you think. I love your kudos & thoughs. Until next time ~Enjoy❤

Dean decides to make food and let Sam get some rest.

He gets up and goes to the fridge. He finds precooked hamburger patties (Crowley was smart enough not to put raw red meat in the fridge.) and stuff to make burgers. It doesn't take him long to cook some bacon, heat up the burgers on a skillet and prepare the burgers with swiss cheese and veggies. There is even a convection cooker that cooks the frozen fries in just minutes while he prepares the burgers.

Dean wakes Sam up to get him to go to the table.

Sam is surprised to see the meal Dean made while he slept. "Thanks De. I'm starving." Sam devours his burger quickly. "Did you make another?" Sam's hopeful.

Dean smiles as he gives Sam a second burger he was keeping warm in the oven.

Sam devours it and then starts on his fries.

Dean laughs. "I haven't seen you eat like that since you were 17."

Sam looks at his empty plate. "I know. It's strange, but I'm still hungry."

Dean shakes his head. "It's not food you're hungry for Sammy."

Sam looks at Dean and realization strikes him. His eyes change and teeth elongate. His mouth drools. "You're right."

Dean's eyes change. "Sammy, we have to keep control." He gets up and grabs his ipod and turns it on. He sits beside his brother and turns it up placing one earbud in his ear and one in Sam's. "Listen Sammy. Just Breathe and listen."

Dean plays calming songs he likes listening to at night or when he feels like wolfing out. Right now he's playing: Bon Jovi - "I'll Be There For You"

The song grabs Sam's attention. He looks into Dean's eyes that are vivid green. "I'm right here Sammy." Sam returns to normal.

Sam takes the earbud out of his ear and takes Dean's hand pulling him to the bed. He lays down and Dean lays down facing Sam. Sam places the earbud back in his ear. They don't lay on each other's chest because the sound of a heartbeat is too much. They want to feed and that's what they want. A fresh juicy heart. So, right now, this is better. They hold each other's hand, close their eyes and let the music lull them to sleep.

Sam wakes up shaking and covered in sweat. He's curled up in a tight ball and Dean is holding him. Sam's head tucked under Dean's chin. "Dean, why is this so hard for me and not you? It's like when I was craving demon blood. Is it because I'm an ex-junkie?"

Dean looks at his brother. "No Sammy." He wipes his damp hair from his face. "Everyone's different. Remember Kate and her sister? Everyone's different. That's all. I'll help you get through this." Dean looks toward the cage bars and yells, "YANG! CAN YOU COME HERE PLEASE?"

Yang comes to the bars. "How may I be of assistance?"

"I need a syringe full of the antidote that was given to me the last time I was here. I know it's not a real cure, but it might help my brother some until the scientist get a real cure."

She sees the state Sam's in. "I'll see what I can do." She vanishes.

"Do you think it will help?" Sam's a mess. He's barely holding it together.

"Something's better than nothing." Dean kisses him softly.

Yang quickly flashes into the cage beside Dean and drops a syringe into his hand and flashes out of the cage.

Dean sees Yang outside the cage. He says, "Thank you." She nods and vanishes.

Dean sits Sam up on the bed. He kneels on the floor in front of Sam. "Look at me Sammy." Sam does. "I'm giving you this same serum I was given. Let's see if it gives you some relief. Okay?"

Sam gives Dean his arm. Dean finds the meaty part of his upper arm and injects him with the serum.

After a second or two, Sam's eyes flash golden yellow then return to their normal hazel color. His breathing doesn't seem to be as labored after a couple minutes. He takes a deep breath and sits up straighter and more alert.

"How are you feeling?" Dean's hopeful.

"Like I could use a shower." He smiles. "It worked. The cravings are gone for now. I'm good."

Dean hugs his brother and they kiss. They don't care who sees.

There's a small restroom in the cage with a shower. Sam takes advantage of it.

Dean takes a shower after Sam finishes.

Sam notices that Dean changed the bedding and cleaned up the dishes while he was showering and shaving. That's Dean. Forever taking care of his little brother. Sam can't help but smile.

A tech asks Sam for a new blood sample since he has the old serum in him now.

"Mr. Winchester, would it be alright if the tech took your blood through the bars?" Yang is trying to be polite, but her mean face makes her request seem more like it's not an option.

Sam just nods. "That's fine."

He sits on the floor and places his arm through the bars. The tech draws blood and all ends well.

Dean sees Sam getting up off the floor as he exits the shower. "What the hell's going on?" Dean rushes to Sam's side.

"It's nothing. I'm fine." Sam has his hands up and around Dean.

Dean is looking over Sam for injuries.

"A tech just drew blood for tests. That's all."

"From the floor?!" Dean's pointing where Sam was sitting. His eyes flash werewolf yellow.

"Yes, through the bars. Dean calm down. I'm okay. Everything's okay." He kisses Dean and it calms him instantly.

Dean holds Sam. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Sam smiles. "You're sexy when you're angry."

Dean pulls away and gives Sam a smirk with a raised eyebrow. "Now I know you're messed up."

Sam just gives a quick, "Ha!" He can't stop smiling.

Neither can Dean.

~~~~~

  
They've tried three cures. All failures. It's Sam's turn to try serum number 9.

It's hard to believe there have been this many failures. Sam's ready to pack it in.

Five seconds after injection, Sam's eyes turn lycan yellow then glow bright lavender. He passes out.

Dean's immediately by his side. "SAMMY?" He finds no pulse. "Come on!"

A doctor has a defibrillator and it's charging. "Excuse me."

Dean looks up and sees the doctor. He quickly lays Sam flat on the ground and removes his shirt. He then moves out of the doctor's way.

The doctor uses his stethoscope and hears no heartbeat. "Clear!" He uses the defibrillator on Sam's chest.

Dean flinches as Sam's body jolts from the electric shock.

The doctor listens for a heart beat and rhythm while charging the defibrillator again.

"Come on Sammy." Dean whispers. He's anxious as hell.

"Clear!" Another jolt of Sam's body. The doctor listens... He's smiling, "He's back. Strong heartbeat. No tachycardia."

The doctor stands up and puts his defibrillator away.

Dean rushes to his brother and sits beside him. He puts Sam's head in his lap, his hand in Sam's hair, the other on his face. "Sammy wake up. Come on Sam." He lightly taps his cheek.

Sam moans. He's very groggy. He curls up and wants to fall back asleep just like this with Dean's fingers in his hair. He groans, "What time is it?"

Dean smiles at his little brother's behavior. He dies and acts as if he's just waking up from a long slumber. "Time to get up off the floor sleepy head. I'm glad you told that reaper to piss off."

Sam yawns. "Yeah. She said I'd wake up soon."

"Oh she did?" Dean's curiosity is piqued. "What else did she say?"

Sam smiles as he hugs Deans leg to his body. His head resting on Dean's thigh. Dean's fingers still moving through Sam's ever soft hair.

[The brothers are on the floor of the lab and all the techs, doctors and demons assigned to be there are quietly watching them.]

Sam sighs happily, "She said I'm no longer a werewolf. This antidote works, but requires death and resuscitation in order for it to be successful. It's why I died. So the mutant cells could die. Once revived, the mutant cells couldn't reanimate because of the antidote. I'm cured." Sam yawns again like it was no big deal.

The room gets louder with doctors and scientist talking and discussing their new discovery.

Dean whispers in amazement, "Well, fuck me."

Sam can't stop smiling, "If you're lucky."

Dean laughs, "Oh I'm lucky! The luckiest bastard in this hell hole." It takes some effort, but he pulls his lazy bones brother up into his arms and embraces him. His werewolf strength making the effort much easier than it should have been. He softly whispers in Sam's ear, "You're alive. I'm next and I promise you I'm going to come right back to you. I'll never leave you." Dean's fingers moving through Sam's hair. "Okay?"

Sam just nods as he grips his brother tight. "I love you jerk. Don't stay gone too long. The reaper's hot. I'll know you were flirting with her if you stay gone too long."

Dean throws his head back in a really good laugh. He sobers and looks into Sam's eyes. "You're the only one I see. The only one I'll ever see."

"I see you too." Sam feels all warm inside.

Dean kisses Sam and their kiss is quick. People are watching and waiting for Dean to take the antidote.

Sam stands up and feels somewhat light headed. He's not sure if it's medical or Dean... or both.

Dean stands and moves into the chair the doctor has ready for him. They remove the long shackles and chains they had attached to his ankles to keep him more than an arm's length away from the doctors and staff. He is locked into the metal clamps on the chair that go around his wrists and ankles. No padlocks needed, just switch locks. Just in case he wolfs out during the injection.

Sam is seated in a chair near by. The brothers can't take their eyes off each other.

The tech injects Dean with the antidote right as Dean mouths the words "I love you." to Sam.

Sam feels his love and grins.

Dean's eye color changes and Sam sees that glowing bright lavender color. He knows that's witchcraft. Dean has a deep growl right before he passes out.

Sam knows he's dead. It's like he feels Dean's death in his own soul. A huge weight is crushing down on him and he can't breathe. "De..."

The techs quickly get Dean out of the chair and on the floor. The doctor has the defibrillator charged. He listens for a heart beat and says, "Clear!"

Dean's body jolts with electricity.

Sam looks away as tears start to form. He can't watch. Memories of Dean almost dying after the Impala crashed with the semi while they were in their twenties come flooding back. Finding dad dead on the floor. Even the time when Dean's heart almost gave out and Sam found the miracle to save him. Only a witch was binding a reaper and using it to swap people's time. Dean got someone else's time to be alive and Sam never felt one ounce of regret for it. The look of death on his face after the hellhound killed him because he sold his soul to bring Sam back. His bloody face as he died in Sam's arms from being stabbed by Metatron...

"He's back! Heart strong. No tachycardia."

Sam whips his head around to find Dean blinking his eyes open and trying to sit up.

Sam quickly goes to his brother and does for him what Dean did for him earlier. "Relax Dean. Just breathe."

Dean lays back down with his head in Sam's lap. Sam carding his fingers through his short hair. Dean clears his throat, "You were right."

Sam raises his eyebrows.

Dean looks into his brother's bloodshot eyes. He can tell Sam's been crying, but he has to say it. "She was hot."

Sam snorts. "Whatever."

"Did you see her tits?" Dean arches his eyebrows.

Sam's thinking about the reaper. "Yeah. They were nice."

Dean shrugs. "She's not my type though."

Sam scoffs. "Oh really. You love pussy."

Dean grins. "Human pussy."

Sam just nods in agreement. They have an unspoken diatribe as they look into each other's eyes. Dean hooked up with Anna and Sam was with Ruby. Never, EVER, again would either of them consider being with anyone that isn't human. Besides, they only want or need each other.

Dean smiles, "She may have a pussy, but she's still a dick." Meaning she's technically an angel.

Sam laughs out loud.

Crowley appears and looks down at the men. "You realize how bizarre the two of you look right now in this setting?"

Sam and Dean look at themselves on the floor. Dean on his back with his ankles and arms crossed. He's wearing only jeans and socks, no shirt. He's also got his head in Sam's lap. Sam's sitting crossed legged in jeans and socks. He has a hoodie on. His hands on Dean's face and in Dean's hair. They look around them and the lab is full of tables, chairs, equipment and people in lab coats.

They both look up at Crowley in unison. Dean asks, "What's you're point?"

Crowley just raises his hands like he has no clue. He rolls his eyes. Maybe he's the moron this time. He sighs, "You ready to return to the 100 Acre Wood, Tigger and Pooh?" (Crowley's thinking he's returning them to Garth's farm.)

Dean sits up looking at Crowley with his brow furrowed. "The fuck?"

Sam's giggling. Yes, giggling.

Dean jumps up and looks at Sam. "Get up. Besides, you're more like Owl than Pooh."

Sam's offended, "What makes you think I'm Pooh? Maybe I'm Tigger." His nose in the air all proud.

Crowley looks at Dean. "You're right. He's Owl. Can we go now?"

Sam's offended. Then he grins and shrugs. He grabs Dean by his shirt (now that he has one on). He whispers in his ear, "Owl needs to know how many licks does it take to get Tigger off?"

Dean puts his hand over his face to hide his blush at Sam's comment.

Sam laughs.

Crowley is getting impatient. "Crowley doesn't need to know nor does he care. Can we please go?!"

Demons start disappearing because they're seeing Crowley's anger rising and want to be as far away from him as possible when he explodes.

Sam quickly gets serious. He faces Crowley. "I need a syringe of the antidote and a copy of how it's made."

"Yes!" Crowley turns to the doctor who has been helping his techs and other staff make more of this antidote. There's a box all ready for the Winchesters to archive in their Men of Letters bunker. Crowley hands it to Sam. Sam opens the box and sees the lavender colored serum in the vial. He looks over the paper before putting it back inside and closing the box.

The men go to the cage to dress properly and grab their duffles. Afterward, they return to the lab floor to let Crowley know they're ready to go to the bunker.

They'll call Garth about the cure. Sam knows Garth and his family will refuse it. They have embraced their lycan lifestyle completely.

Crowley places his hands on their shoulders and they arrive in the bunker instantly. Crowley looks at the brothers. "Call me if this cure goes south in any way. Otherwise..." One snap and he's gone.

"Does he have to leave that foul sulfur stench behind?" Sam waves at the air.

Dean grabs the air freshener from the bookshelf and sprays some. "He does it on purpose."

Cas walks into the library. "Hello Sam. Dean."

"Hey Cas." Dean grins.

Sam starts to take his and Dean's duffle to their rooms, but Dean stops him. "Don't unpack just yet."

Sam sets the duffles down.

"Leaving again so soon?" Cas is confused.

"Sam and I need to go on a case. We're finally cured and we need to be out on the road. Being in that cage really got under my skin." Dean looks at Sam.

Sam nods. "Yeah. Me too." He looks around. "Where's mom?"

Cas shrugs. "She's a Winchester. She's hunting."

"Alone?" Dean asks.

Cas shrugs as if he could stop her.

"How's Jack?" Sam asks Cas.

"He's tired of being confined to this bunker, but he understands it's for his own protection." Cas looks toward Dean. "It would be good if the two of you spent some time with him."

Dean explains, "Sam and I need some alone time. We had to die so the new cure would work."

Cas looks over at Sam who's lost to his own thoughts. Being around the brothers all these years, he can tell that Sam's still a bit distraught over their ordeal. Dean seems to be taking it in stride, as he usually does. "Do either of you need anything from me?"

Dean places a hand on Cas's shoulder. "What you're doing for Jack is enough. We'll take him out when we get back."

Sam takes his bag to his room. He grabs some clean clothes and tosses his dirty clothes in the hamper. He goes to Dean's room and gets some clean clothes for him as well.

When he's about to leave Dean's room Jack is standing in front of him.

Jack looks Sam in the eyes. "I just wanted to thank you for believing in me. I've been wanting to thank you for some time, but you've been busy." He smiles.

Sam places his hand on Jack's shoulder. "There was a time when no one believed in me. Not even Dean. No one should feel that way. Especially when the circumstances are beyond your control. You never asked for any of this." He removes his hand from Jack's shoulder.

Jack nods. "I'm better now. Castiel has taught me so much." He hands Sam a parchment. "This is how we'll open the portal between our universe and the one your mom's in. Castiel and I have gathered almost everything. We just need archangel grace."

Sam looks up from the parchment. Dean and Cas are standing behind Jack.

Dean looks defeated and angry. "Cas just told me. I have no idea where we're going to find archangel grace. They're all dead except Michael who's locked in a cage and Lucifer in another universe." Dean sighs and turns to walk away.

Sam grabs Dean's arm. "Don't give up just yet. We'll find a way. We always do."

Dean looks into Sam's eyes. He thinks about all they've been through. The miracles that keep happening over and over again.

Dean smiles as he places his hand on top of Sam's. "You're right. We always find a way."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading Trouble Sleeping. Please let me know what you think. Your kudos and comments encourage me more than you could ever imagine. ❤


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